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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27195685">Aegis in the Abyss</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/6romide/pseuds/6romide'>6romide</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Aegis Arc [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Accidental Bonding, Dubious Consent, Forced Bonding, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, M/M, Manipulation, Mind Games, Mindfuck, Past Sexual Abuse, Rape/Non-con Elements, Slash, Time Travel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 16:48:48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>66,945</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27195685</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/6romide/pseuds/6romide</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Unbeknownst to Harry, at the moment of Dumbledore's death, the protection bond known as the Aegis latched onto a  new protector. Two years later, Voldemort finally has his hands on his human horcrux and has granted Severus the privilege of breaking him. It's the old adage: you can't break what's already  broken. But who broke Harry Potter in the first place and is Snape willing to put him back together again...or does he have other ideas? HP/SS</p><p>  <i>“But, you said it was wise not to trust you,” Harry said.</i><br/><i>Severus blinked. “I lied.”</i></p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy/Voldemort, Harry Potter/Severus Snape, Harry Potter/Tom Riddle, Harry Potter/Tom Riddle | Voldemort, Harry Potter/Voldemort, Lucius Malfoy/Harry Potter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Aegis Arc [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2016265</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>139</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>469</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Captured</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Harry takes a plunge.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm taking massive liberties with canon. This fic was inspired by two of my favorite Harry/Severus stories: (1) Nights of Gethsemane by starcrossed (on AO3 under HPFandom Archive, can also find on Live Journal as starcrossedkayla or kibatsu) and its lovely companion piece, Invictus from Snape's POV. And of course, (2) Tread Softly by Dius Corvus (on fanfiction net). I urge you to read those. I would be remiss if I didn't mention them. However, this is my own story and I hope you don't compare because I know I'll come up awfully short.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>“Beware that, when fighting monsters, you yourself do not become a monster...for when you gaze long into the abyss. The abyss gazes also into you.”</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>― Friedrich W. Nietzsche</strong>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <strong>Chapter 1. Captured</strong>
</p><p>…He was in the graveyard again. Clutched to the stone chest of the tombstone, paralyzed as he watched a figure rising from the steaming cauldron in the middle of the night. Wormtail smiling up at the birth of the monster in glee, his arm dripping with blood…Cedric's face, peering out lifelessly into the night. The figure turned its reptilian head just then, hissing something that sounded so familiar, yet so garbled, as if he were speaking underwater.</p><p>"Ah, my own…" Harry's scar had exploded in pain, pinpricks behind his eyes, and he fought to stay conscious through it all. What was it Voldemort had said just then? "The boy…it is the boy…the one unintended…prized above all others…" The distortion stopped and the Dark Lord's words snapped into sharpness. "Give me your arm, Wormtail!"</p><p>The dream sequence proceeded as before. Death Eaters arrived on scene, their white masks glowing in the dim light of the moon. No, what was it that Voldemort had said to him then as he rose from the cauldron? What was it? Prized? Cherished? Unintended…his very own. Harry fought his mind, attempting to replay the scene again, but it was too late. The more he fought, the more awake he became.</p><p>"Harry! Harry!"</p><p>Just before rising to the surface, he thought he heard a distinct crooning in his ear. <em>I can touch you now</em>.</p><p>"Harry!" Hermione slapped him hard across the face, sending him spiraling off of his sleeping bag and onto the cold grass of the forest floor.</p><p>Harry grimaced, touching his cheek gingerly.</p><p>"I'm sorry, Harry. It's just, you said to wake you up when it got bad and…it seemed rather bad."</p><p>They were in the Forest of Dean. On the run. Two fugitives. Hunting horcruxes. Harry steadied himself. He had lost his wand, but he was proficient enough in wandless magic, a trait he had picked up seemingly out of nowhere. "Thanks, Hermione," he mumbled. He looked up at the moon, still visible within the protective wards he and Hermione had put up when Ron had left them. There was a full moon tonight, bright and glowing, just like the one in his dreams. They hadn't had any luck locating any of the other horcruxes apart from Slytherin's locket, despite all of the signs and Hermione's deduction skills. It seemed they were all out of the sheer dumb luck that seemed to overflow at Hogwarts.</p><p>"Do you…want to talk about it?" Hermione asked cautiously. She looked dead on her feet, having spent the last hours keeping watch over their tent as Harry had slept. It was clear that Ron's absence was doing a number on her.</p><p>"It's the same one," Harry said, waving her off with a casualness he didn't feel. "I still can't make out what he says. I'll…I'll just take over the watch now, okay?" The words were meant to sound dismissive and comforting at once, but his heart beat too fast for that to be the case. She was too clever for her own good and Harry was positive that he was keeping secrets that were even unknown to him, more secrets than just this one. His instincts told him to keep those secrets close, whatever they were.</p><p>"But I still have a couple more hours," Hermione protested weakly. "I just came in to wake you."</p><p>"No, it's fine. I can't sleep now anyway…I'll be fine. Go sleep now, Hermione."</p><p>She flashed him a grateful smile and reached to take the heavy locket off her neck. "Thanks, Harry."</p><p>As Hermione crawled into bed, Harry couldn't shake the guilt that clung to his skin. It was true that he couldn't make out exactly what Voldemort had said, but he heard enough now, over the course of the last few months, that he now knew exactly what he was. Harry fingered the horcrux hanging from his neck, the weight a physical reminder of the weight he also carried. He just couldn't bring himself to tell her that, as if that single thread would unravel the entire thing. "Good night, Hermione," Harry whispered, stepping out of the tent and into the night.</p><p>It had been a few months since that night on the tower, yet Harry dreamed of it nearly every night, taking turns between that and the graveyard. Hermione insisted that it was trauma and that his subconscious was trying to process the horror and the loss. Harry wasn't so sure. It was as if part of himself were urging him to see…<em>something</em>. And to his growing trepidation, Harry was starting to see. At first, it was little inaccuracies, like a spoken word here or there, but with each iteration, snatches of conversation grew into long speeches. Moments were actually hours of memories. Dialogue once muffled was crystal clear, like a veil had been lifted at the exact moment of Dumbledore's death. That alone wasn't the most comforting thought.</p><p>An owl hooted overhead, the sounds of the forest a backdrop to his thoughts as he replayed the night of Dumbledore's death. He and Dumbledore had just arrived at the Astronomy tower, his invisibility cloak falling over him as Dumbledore froze him in place, his tongue locked to the roof of his mouth. Not a second too soon as Draco Malfoy barged into the room. Dumbledore had tried to persuade the boy even then, but now, Harry was sure there was another reason why he wasted his last breaths on the likes of Draco Malfoy: he had been stalling for time. It wasn't until Snape arrived, his robes swirling around him, that the air thickened, the tension holding everyone in place. <em>Please…please…</em> Harry remembered it with such clarity, that he felt the hairs on the back of his arms stand at attention. The headmaster pleading with Severus Snape. At the time, Harry had been so overwhelmed that he could only think of escape. Now though? Harry acutely remembered Albus passing one last glance upon Harry's hidden form, a wisp of a smile on his face, as if the next few moments would be making up for a multitude of sins Harry could only hope to guess. It was as if he were setting Harry free…free from what? Except, the next moment, as Snape struck, the green light shooting out and engulfing Dumbledore, blasting him off the tower and down to the world below, Harry felt as if he were anything but free. He had put it down to nerves before, a queasiness accompanied by the death of a loved one being murdered before his eyes…Harry shut his eyes now, reaching inside himself for the anchor that had settled like lead in his chest at the exact moment Albus had died. No, something else had happened that night, something more sinister…If only Dumbledore had trusted him enough to tell him. Always keeping him in the dark, uninformed, the last to know about himself…</p><p>Harry couldn't help feeling more than a little resentful. His ignorance cost him Sirius and many more besides. His entire fifth year, the headmaster had refused to even look at him as if he were tainted somehow. And now, as Harry stared at the horcrux in his lap, he couldn't help but think maybe Dumbledore was right. He had known after all what Harry was…thus, he gave Harry to Snape to do his dirty work and look into his mind when Dumbledore would not. As if those occlumency lessons actually helped. Sirius was still dead, Harry thought bitterly. There had been no point at all in allowing Snape to access his memories. <em>Clear you mind, Potter. Pathetic. Why am I wasting my time on you?</em> Despite his efforts, Harry couldn't erect an occlumency shield to save his life. It was as if he were doomed from the start. As his thoughts turned to the potions master, Harry's chest lurched. Another strange development after Dumbledore had died, one Dumbledore either hadn't foreseen or hadn't deigned to share with Harry. Another secret.</p><p>Harry was lost in his thoughts, when the air around him seemed to freeze. Not a moment after did a silvery-white patronus materialize out of the air…The silver doe gazed at him steadily before turning its great beautiful head and walking away. He should tell Hermione, he thought weakly, knowing in his heart that he would not. It could be a trap…Harry dismissed that thought as soon as it came. It was a patronus. No dark wizard Harry knew could conjure something so good and light. Besides, that tugging in his chest again was urging him to follow her.</p><p>He wondered whether the caster of the patronus was still around, perhaps behind the trees he ran past to catch up with the doe. He couldn't think of anyone he knew in the DA whose patronus was a doe, and it was possible one of the Order members had a patronus he had yet to see or one that had recently changed…The doe bounded into a small clearing by a frozen pool and promptly vanished into mist, leaving not even a physical hoof print in the white powdery snow. Harry took a deep breath, trying to steady his heart which, if anything, continued to beat faster. With the doe's absence, he should have felt afraid, lured here, in the middle of a forest, alone. But he didn't. His eyes scanned the trees surrounding the clearing. Who…? The answer came promptly to his mind as his chest ached again. He shook his head. No, now was not the time to get sucked into his memories. He had to focus. What if Hermione came looking for him and panicked? He would be fast.</p><p>Harry stepped further into the clearing, rounding the frozen pool. <em>Lumos</em>, he thought, a small ball of light appearing in front of him, which he directed down towards the pool. Something reflected the light back at him and he could only blink rapidly as he recognized the sword of Godric Gryffindor. <em>Accio sword</em>. Nothing. He looked around the trees again. The first lights of dawn just touching the horizon. Did he dare…? He pushed out his magic, cracking the layer of ice and parting it, so that there would be enough room for what he intended. Teeth chattering in the cold, Harry began to strip…</p><p>The ice cold water bit into his skin as he plunged beneath the surface. His hand grasping blindly for the ruby-encrusted hilt. The horcrux in the locket tightened the chain around his neck as if sensing its own mortality so near the weapon of its destruction. Harry wondered why the horcrux in his own head wasn't struggling, an absent thought as he felt himself sinking to the bottom, the locket intent on killing…The answer also absently floating in his mind that maybe his own horcrux thought it had the best chance of survival if all the other horcruxes were gone. Voldemort wouldn't be able to afford to kill Harry or the horcrux within…his own survival guaranteed. All this was for naught, however, as the locket continued to choke him. The wandless, wordless spells Harry thought of bouncing harmlessly off the cursed object. The dark spots before his eyes growing…</p><p>Strong arms wrapped themselves around his waist, hoisting him up towards freedom. He broke the surface, gasping for air, his eyes screwed tight. <em>Hermione?</em> But no, the arms were stronger, masculine. Had Ron returned? Lightheaded, he felt his bare back collide with the snow. His hands clawed viciously at his neck, trying to get the chain off him, not realizing that it had been cut off and was lying in the snow some feet away. His hands were clasped in a strong grip and yanked upwards over his head, preventing him from hurting himself even more. The weight in his chest was back…or on his chest, as he felt a body settle above him. No, definitely not Hermione.</p><p>"Shhhh." He felt a warm hand brush hair out of his face. He attempted to open his eyes, but he was too weak, too dizzy. The ache in his chest got worse. "Stupid boy. Taking everything off <em>except</em> for the locket."</p><p>Then he heard another voice and he could feel the body above his tense. "Severus, where'd you run off to?" the cultured voice of Lucius Malfoy floated through the trees.</p><p>Harry's emerald green eyes shot open. No longer able to deny who his savior was. Snape's coal black eyes bored into his, closer than he had anticipated. The man smelled of herbs. Maybe he had even been out harvesting them during the full moon…The man had a peculiar look on his face as he stared down at Harry who had not once tried to get away from the man who killed Albus Dumbledore. Who, instead, seemed content to lie in the snow beneath him.</p><p>Lucius' voice came again, closer this time, and the boy visibly shuddered. Harry's eyes seemed to beg Snape to do something, maybe roll off of him, hide him, get him some clothes, fight with him…</p><p>"Ah, Severus, I see now why you wanted to go alone…" The smirk in Lucius' voice was unmistakable. Unabashedly, he drank in the sight of Harry lying naked on his back, pinned beneath a fully clothed Snape. Behind Lucius was Hermione and…Ron, tied up with a spell and immobilized. Ron must have inadvertently led them here, Harry thought, and while Ron went to find Hermione, he had been lured away.</p><p>"Lucius…" Snape growled.</p><p>"Fine, fine, have it your way," Lucius said. "And to think <em>he</em> doubted you. He should have put you in charge of the hunt months ago. Would have saved us a lot of time…"</p><p>Harry could only blink up at Snape, feeling the ache settle in his chest. <em>Protection</em>. And then his vision began to swim.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. The Contest</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus is uninvited...or is he?</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There was a reason that Harry, Hermione, and Ron had been unable to locate the other horcruxes. Lord Voldemort had reabsorbed them all, all but two: the locket and the boy, and the locket he was intending to absorb that very evening. When he had risen from the cauldron about three years before, the connection between Harry and himself had sizzled into being, renewing their connection and awakening Tom Riddle within its host. It made him acutely aware of the vulnerability of having split his soul, and drove him to undo the damage before it was too late. Voldemort could feel no such foreign presence now as he looked at the unconscious form of Harry Potter, beaten and bloody in the middle of the throne room.</p><p>The others he had thrown in the dungeons of Malfoy Manor for safe keeping. The boy, however, was his.</p><p>Severus watched detached at the proceedings. Each of the members of the inner circle had gotten their turn to torture the boy-who-lived. Even Draco, not quite that high in their ranks, was permitted a turn to tear a crucio induced scream from his classmate. It wasn't meant to be like this. He was to give the boy the sword and leave, and later tell the Dark Lord his mission was a failure. He couldn't have predicted the idiocy of the Weasley boy, basically leaving a trail of breadcrumbs for anyone to find them. And Lucius…Severus glanced at the proud man grinning wolfishly beside him. What<em> had</em> Lucius been doing following him when he had specifically told him he would be going <em>alone</em>?</p><p>"Severus…" The Dark Lord pierced him with scarlet eyes, the only things that hadn't reverted back to fully human when he had absorbed the other horcruxes. "Revive the boy so that we make speak to each other."</p><p>If anyone had noticed Severus had not taken a part in the entertainment that evening, no one commented on it. He doubted it had escaped the Dark Lord's notice though, as he approached the crumpled figure on the stone floor. His nakedness did not seem that obvious now, covered in his own blood.</p><p>"Enervate!" Severus said harshly, the boy gasping in a lungful of air as his eyes snapped open, trying to focus on Severus' dark ones through the haze. Tremors ran through the small body, but still, he pushed himself up on his knees at least, unwilling to just stay down.</p><p>"Welcome back, Harry Potter," Voldemort said, as if he were inviting the boy to tea. The Death Eaters jeered in the background.</p><p>"Voldemort," Harry whispered, his voice hoarse from screaming. For once, Severus did not reprimand him.</p><p>The two stared at each other. Finally, Voldemort spoke again. "Harry, has your precious Dumbledore told you what you are? What you carry inside of you? Or has that muggle loving fool kept you in the dark yet again…"</p><p>Harry looked off to the side, and it was clear to everyone that he had struck a nerve. The crowd laughed.</p><p>"Foolish, foolish boy…and they thought you were the hope of the wizarding world."</p><p>Harry didn't know what made him do it, but he couldn't stand having that wound ripped open once again. It was enough that Dumbledore had left him all alone, but that was his choice. Voldemort couldn't take credit for that.</p><p><em>"I know exactly what I am. I am your unintended. The horcrux you never meant to make. You will not kill me. I know this already.</em>"</p><p>The room went deathly silent as the parseltongue flowed from the boy's lips.</p><p>"Yes, you will be a magnificent prize," Voldemort replied in English, pleased beyond comprehension, and scaring the boy more than any curse would have. "Don't you know, my unintended, that there are things worse than death? And I can save you from it all, if you only bowed down to me." He emphasized each sentence with a wordless spell that felt like a whip had slashed across Harry's back, making him fall back to the ground.</p><p><em>"I will never be yours," </em>Harry snarled.</p><p>"Everyone has a breaking point, Harry," Voldemort explained patiently. "We just need to find yours." Harry attempted fruitlessly to back away, but found himself pressed against someone else…against Snape. <em>"Tell me, Harry. Are you a virgin?" </em>Harry couldn't help the blush that stole up his cheeks, fighting anger and shame at once. He was a war prisoner, yes, but he hadn't thought…<em>I can touch you now</em>. No, he had known. He just couldn't believe that this creature could desire anything but destruction.</p><p>"Then that will be the first thing you will grant me, won't you, Harry? When you are broken, you will beg for me to take you. <em>Crucio</em>!"</p><p>As Harry lay writhing on the ground, he was dimly aware of the rules Voldemort was now laying down to break him. He was to be passed like a ragdoll from person to person, until they either gave up or broke him. The spell lifted and he lay gasping on his side.</p><p>"My lord, please, let me go first!" Bellatrix crooned, as demented as the day in the Department of Mysteries, simpering after her lord. The Lestrange brothers would have their turn. Then MacNair, Rosier, Crabbe, Goyle, and Lucius…</p><p>Harry tried to keep the names straight in his head, to know what fate had in store for him. Then Severus was called to step to the front of the room.</p><p>"Severus…" Harry struggled through his pain to hear. He was sure he would not break. Something in him was absolutely sure that he was in a sense unbreakable, though he couldn't fathom why. But as Severus stood before Voldemort, Harry began to worry. There was something off about Snape…or off with Harry. Something that changed the night Dumbledore died, something he had to keep close to his heart lest Voldemort use it against him. "Lucius tells me that you have touched the boy before you came here…I was unaware that you felt that way about him, Severus."</p><p>He would have to tread carefully here. "My lord, you wanted him alive. I had to save him from his own stupidity, drowning in the pool." He did not have to fake the bitterness in his voice, still miffed that Lucius thought he had caught him in a compromising position.</p><p>"And why was he in the pool in the first place, my slippery servant?"</p><p>"My lord?" Severus gave nothing away as he occluding his mind, even as the pale hands of the Dark Lord came to lift Severus' chin so that their eyes met. The red gaze scoured the thoughts of his servant, but finding nothing but loathing for Potter, eventually pulled away.</p><p>"You will not participate in the breaking. This is final."</p><p>Surprisingly, it was Lucius who spoke up. "My lord, if not for Severus, we would have never found Potter in the first place."</p><p>Severus risked a glance at Lucius in surprise. It was obvious Lucius wanted something from him, for he had never known the blond to stick his neck out for anyone else's benefit. Though, it was Lucius who had gotten him in trouble in the first place.</p><p>Voldemort seemed to consider this, his gaze lingering over Harry who was still fighting to stay awake. "Very well. I shall think on this. Bellatrix…you may take him. Remember, no lasting damage…"</p><p>"Of course, my lord…"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Advice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus offers Lucius some advice.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been over a month since Severus had last seen the boy, dragged by his hair by Bellatrix Lestrange. Word had it that even she hadn't been able to break the boy and that her husband and brother-in-law had not fared much better. Gossip had it that MacNair hadn't been heard from since the Dark Lord received his progress report. The boy was now in Rosier's hands, no doubt enduring the unyielding words of the Dark Lord's most proficient breaker. Dumbledore had believed the boy would be their salvation, but Severus was not as blind as to believe a mere seventeen-year-old could rid the world of evil. If anything, he would be a prisoner of war soon long-forgotten by everyone…everyone but him. Not that Severus liked the boy or anything. Arrogant, foolhardy, idiotic…the boy was a menace, and yet, Severus was honor bound to protect him. Albus never said anything about not letting the boy shatter, though. Sardonically, Snape thought to himself that if the Dark Lord managed to break the boy, which was no doubt going to come to pass, it would make it that much easier to keep him out of trouble and relatively free from harm until the Order got their shit together and freed them both from this hell.</p><p>He was sitting now in Malfoy Manor, in one of the many drawing rooms, decorated with fine vases full of fresh blooms and golden artifacts worth a small fortune. A glass of elf wine was in his hands and he sipped it modestly, not daring to get inebriated at a time like this.</p><p>It was a ritual of sorts. Every Friday, Death Eaters would gather in Malfoy Manor, their base of operations, and get stupidly drunk, sharing news and gossip, and generally relaxing from the week of doing a madman's bidding. Severus couldn't lie. It was nice, in a dangerous sort of way, to come here and unwind after hours of leaning over a cauldron. It was also a perfect time to gather intelligence, because, unsurprisingly, the Dark Lord didn't take it upon himself to keep everyone abreast of each other's movements and alcohol did tend to loosen the lips.</p><p>Above the general chatter, Bellatrix's voice could be heard a room away, whining to all who would listen. "Who knew itty bitty Potter had a backbone?" It seemed she was still not over her failure at breaking the brat. Truth be told, Severus was surprised the boy had lasted that long. Then again, Bellatrix didn't have the subtlety to completely break Potter. She could hurt him, yes. Make him scream even. But she didn't understand the inner workings of his pitifully shallow mind, his unoriginal hero complex, or his near-sighted motivations. She wouldn't get far in bending him towards unyielding, eternal servitude with a whip and a knife.</p><p>"Severus…" Lucius came out of nowhere and sat himself in the chair beside the potions master, glass of wine in hand.</p><p>"Lucius," Severus acknowledged. The rest of the room was drunk enough now that they could speak in relative privacy, but then Severus felt the wash of a silencing charm descend upon him. Curious now, he turned to fully face the Malfoy patriarch. "Another fine gathering."</p><p>"Thank you…I take it you've heard the news regarding Mr. Potter?" Lucius asked quietly. "Bellatrix is quite stricken. The Lestranges didn't even show tonight."</p><p>Severus had noticed that as well. No doubt they were too embarrassed to show their faces here after the tongue lashing (and the real lashing) Voldemort gave them last meeting.</p><p>"He'll break soon enough," Severus said easily, not even feigning that he didn't care one way or the other.</p><p>"I wouldn't be so sure, old friend," Lucius said mildly. "Rosier flooed me earlier today and said that his mind wasn't like the others. You know how he broke those muggle children last summer. You would think Potter would be putty in his hands."</p><p>That caught Severus by surprise. Rosier was a man of his craft. "I assure you, Potter isn't that strong. Rosier still has the rest of the week."</p><p>Lucius was shaking his head. "I can't take that chance. The Dark Lord has designs on Draco if he isn't broken by Monday."</p><p>That was news to him. Maybe with the Dark Lord's youthful looks came other carnal desires…Severus suppressed a shudder.</p><p>"You don't doubt your own abilities, do you Lucius?" Severus asked, swirling his wine. "He is just trying to motivate you. Draco won't come to any harm."</p><p>"Even so," Lucius said stiffly, "I would like to call in a favor."</p><p>"Indeed."</p><p>"For the time I spared you from the Dark Lord's wrath after the boy's capture," he clarified.</p><p>"Ah…" He knew Lucius would never forget even the slightest good deed. "What would you have me do, Lucius? You know I cannot save Draco from his fate a <em>second</em> time." The death of Albus Dumbledore hung unspoken in the air between them.</p><p>"No, I want information. You have taught the boy for six years, my friend. Surely there is something there, something that I can work with."</p><p>He could not believe he was having this conversation with Lucius of all people. It felt surreal. Had the world gone mad? Strategizing to break the most empty-headed boy alive?</p><p>"The boy is a simpleton," Snape sneered. "His unwillingness to break has nothing to do with his conviction but his lack of self-preservation. He has no brain cells to speak of, is undyingly loyal to his friends who were stupid enough to lead us straight to him. He is a Gryffindor through and through. He would never bow to the Dark Lord, not even when faced with death."</p><p>Lucius glanced towards the cellar door. "I see. Perhaps I should offer him a deal, then…"</p><p>Severus shot him a bewildered look. "Potter is too virtuous for deals—" <em>and much too smart to take them from you</em>. Where had that thought come from? Was he really defending Potter in his own mind? "Even if you could free his friends, he would not bow," Snape finished lamely.</p><p>"Then give me something else, Severus. What else do you know of the boy? I am only trying to save my son…"</p><p>"Lucius, believe me, you won't have a problem making the boy submit. The boy was raised by abusive muggles. Touch starved. He grew up believing he was unworthy of love, a waste of space, and a freak. Everyone who has had a crack at the boy has approached him as the boy-who-lived, as if he wields a power that needs to be subdued. Don't be blind to the obvious. He was isolated and starved for years growing up. He just needs reminding where he came from and he'll fall apart, I guarantee it."</p><p>Part of Snape felt a little guilty as a malicious grin spread over the aristocrat's face. From a certain angle, he was surely sealing the boy's fate, but from another (and perhaps more correct angle) he was saving them both from having to extend this charade of a breaking contest. Didn't Potter understand that life would be better for him (and indeed for Severus) if he just gave the Dark Lord what he wanted to buy them both time? Now, he had the Dark Lord's full attention. An obsession. But once he stopped kicking, the Dark Lord would soon grow tired of the boy and move on. At least, that's what Severus believed.</p><p>"Severus, I am surely in your debt," Lucius smirked. "Who knew you would be privy to so much of the boy's past?"</p><p>"You did apparently," Severus sneered.</p><p>"Regardless, you have my thanks."</p><p>As Lucius walked away, Snape stared into his wine glass. Perhaps he had had too much to drink after all. He drank the last bit and glanced at the cellar door. Maybe it wasn't all a waste. With any luck, he would have freed the Granger girl and the Weasley brat at least, and maneuvered Potter safely out of the spotlight. Not that the boy would ever thank him...</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. A Deal</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Lucius Malfoy makes an offer.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lucius could hardly believe it when he woke up after his first day to screams coming from the guest room. Surely Bellatrix would have mentioned he was a screamer? The boy was tangled in the bedsheets, sweat pouring down his face, his back arched at a painful angle.</p>
<p>"<em>No, no, no…Crucio!</em>" Between his muffled words were piercing screams. Lucius approached the bed, wand out. He wasn't really afraid, per se. The boy's magic was contained in the deceptively delicate chains around the boy's wrists. Still, it was better to be cautious where Potter was concerned.</p>
<p>He knew the boy was privy to visions. It was something that fascinated and terrified most Death Eaters. Seeing it was another matter entirely. He was just about to <em>Crucio</em> the boy awake when a whimper spilled from the boy's mouth, "<em>Draco</em>."</p>
<p>Lucius' blood ran cold. In a minute, he had the boy awake with a stinging hex. The emerald green eyes locking onto him as soon as the vision cleared.</p>
<p>"Potter," Lucius nodded.</p>
<p>Harry only blinked at him stupidly. Following Severus' advice, he had directed Crabbe and Goyle to spend their week with the boy keeping him in isolation and more or less starved. He knew the boy must be hungry by now, and summoned a house-elf into the room with a mere thought.</p>
<p>"Bring some breakfast for Mr. Potter," Lucius ordered, keeping his eyes trained on Harry's face as the boy tried to process what new torture the week would bring. The vision of Draco being split open, his back a bloodied mess, as the Dark Lord thrust in and out of him was fresh in Harry's mind. It was what broke the strong resemblance between Draco and his father now. One, a picture of aristocracy. The other, fallen beyond repair. He looked away.</p>
<p>"He has Draco," Harry spoke softly into the silence of the room.</p>
<p>Lucius only nodded. His fist tightened over his cane, the only indication that he was ill at ease with the arrangement. He had been eager at first to break the boy with violence, but with Draco in the Dark Lord's clutches…he would need to expedite the process, and if that meant treating Potter like a politician he had to wine and dine, he could do that.</p>
<p>The house-elf popped back into the room with a plate of eggs and waffles and a glass of orange juice. The tray was floated over to the boy, the smells making his stomach growl. Harry looked at the food and then back at Lucius.</p>
<p>"Eat," Lucius commanded.</p>
<p>Harry nodded. The food could have been poisoned, but somehow he didn't think so. Though Draco and he had never been friends—indeed, the blond was only too happy to torture him a few weeks ago—he also understood that no one deserved to be in sexual slavery to the Dark Lord. If only temporarily. He didn't need to study Lucius long to figure out that the Dark Lord's method of motivation was working. The Malfoys could be played off each other like that. Narcissa's life could be threatened to motivate Draco to murder the headmaster. Draco's safety could be threatened to make Lucius break him…In a way, it was admirable. Harry had no one he could be threatened with any more. No, that was selfish. There was still Ron and Hermione…the Weasleys…</p>
<p>Harry took a bite of his eggs, savoring the warmth and the flavor. It had been so long…"You're doing better than Rosier," Harry commented mildly.</p>
<p>"Pardon me?" Lucius snapped, before remembering his plan and softening his features. "Please explain."</p>
<p>"You're being kind," Harry stated, matter-of-factly. "It makes sense. I'm more willing to listen to kindness." But his eyes belied that he knew this was not genuine kindness, and so the entire statement was unsupported. It did beg the question though, why had Lucius chosen this route when his blood relatives so eagerly opted for pain?</p>
<p>"Good. Then you'll like what I have in store for you today."</p>
<p>"Oh?" Harry asked, cutting off a piece of his waffle. Apparently, Malfoy didn't fear he'd use his cutlery to kill him or himself. Whatever the Malfoy patriarch had in mind, it seemed he was self-assured it would be enough to persuade him.</p>
<p>"I am willing to free the mud- the muggleborn and the Weasley boy if you promise me you will bow to the Dark Lord."</p>
<p>Harry cocked his head to the side. "That's awfully generous…" Still wary from his time locked in the small windowless room in Goyle's mansion, he kept his eye on the blond as he approached the bed, hand outstretched to card his fingers through Harry's hair.</p>
<p><em>Kindness and affection</em>. Harry leaned into the touch, playing along. It was clear that Malfoy was desperate to save his son, and it probably felt like pure torture pretending to cater to Harry's well-being, as false as it was. "I can try…" Harry said, "But I would have to see them again first."</p>
<p>"Of course," Lucius murmured. "Tomorrow."</p>
<p>-o-o-o-</p>
<p>Harry lay awake in the opulent four-poster bed. The comforter was warm and soft and fluffy, as were the pillows. A far cry from the dungeon floor or the chains he had hung from in the weeks previous. He was worried about tomorrow.</p>
<p>Lucius was pretending to care for now, but he knew the man would snap and likely torture him close to death when he realized that Harry would not—or could not—do what he wanted. It wasn't that Harry didn't want to free Hermione and Ron, or that he wouldn't even save Draco, it was that something within him simply would not allow it. And again the dreams of Dumbledore assuring him that everything was going to be alright and that when he was gone, so too would the madness…moments in time he could not fully place where or when they happened. And then, there was a memory, locked beneath the others. He was sure of it. All he got were impressions of a stone floor, a cell…a prison, yet Harry was sure he hadn't been captured by Death Eaters before in his life. So then, where had that taken place?</p>
<p>
  <em>"Please, Professor Dumbledore, please. I can't…"</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>"I was wrong to believe I could shield you from this war, Harry. This is for your own good. This training…"</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>"I'm begging you…"</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>"No, Harry. I'm sorry, but I'd rather you lived and hated me, then died and loved me. It is a small sacrifice I am willing to make…for the Greater Good."</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And Harry had been dragged away…</em>
</p>
<p>Then, unbidden, the image of the potion master's dark piercing eyes appeared. The ramifications of this new fixation were starting to scare him. Maybe Severus was on the headmaster's side all along. Perhaps Albus had begged for a quick and painless death. But Severus was the one who had captured him and brought him here…and Harry was starting to doubt his faith in the headmaster after all. Dumbledore had trusted Snape, but did Harry trust the headmaster?</p>
<p>He was trapped in the guest room of Malfoy Manor and tomorrow, he would try to save Hermione and Ron from their captivity…</p>
<p>-o-o-o-</p>
<p>"Harry!" Hermione gasped, giving Lucius a sideways glance before running up and hugging her friend. Ron followed suite, more cautious than before. It seemed his stay in the dungeons beat some wariness into him.</p>
<p>"Harry, mate…you're alive!" Ron exclaimed.</p>
<p>"I will give you time to catch up," Lucius said curtly, leaving the room in gesture only as they all knew he'd be monitoring them by other means.</p>
<p>"What's going on, Harry?" Hermione asked worried. "They haven't done anything to us in weeks. The only one we see is Narcissa and she doesn't even talk to us."</p>
<p>"Yeah mate. Malfoy almost seemed kind…"</p>
<p>Harry gestured for them to sit down on the plush sofa as he sat on the edge of the bed. "He's trying to break me."</p>
<p>"With kindness?" Ron asked dumbly.</p>
<p>"Oh!" Hermione stared wide-eyed at Harry, knowing well the abuse Harry suffered as a child. "But you're not going to break, are you? Harry, you can't give in!"</p>
<p>"I'm buying your freedom."</p>
<p>"You <em>what</em>? Harry James Potter, you listen to me! Don't—don't do this for us. We haven't been hurt in weeks!" Hermione said, grabbing Harry's hands in hers. "If you fall, the rest of the world falls. Don't let them use us like this!"</p>
<p>"No, Hermione. I need you to be safe," Harry said. "I…I can't explain it, but I don't feel too well. I'm not sure how much longer I'll have the upper hand in any sense of the word and it would…mean a great deal to me if you were safe. If I knew you were safe."</p>
<p>"Harry…" Ron took in a deep breath. He looked away, a single angry tear making its way down his cheek. Harry was supposed to save the world, not throw it all away… "We'll find the Order. We'll get you out of here when we're free. Alright? We won't stop trying, I promise you, mate."</p>
<p>Harry nodded miserably. "Yes…"</p>
<p>The three of them took each other by the hands and just sat there in silence. Understanding flowing between them. A sharp knock at the door preceded Lucius' return.</p>
<p>"Come…all of you. The Dark Lord awaits." Lucius shared a significant look with Harry. "And Draco will also be there."</p>
<p>Ron looked about to say something, but Hermione shushed him. Harry understood then that Ron and Hermione would be held as hostages until he gave the Dark Lord what he wanted. His knees threatened to fold beneath him, but Lucius took him by the arm, in a mocking gesture of gentleness, and led him out into the hall. Ron and Hermione were both tied up and immobilized, reminiscent of that day in the forest…Harry's heart hammered in his chest. It would be simple. Just a small, little bow… He could do it…There was really nothing to it. His pride was already in tatters…</p>
<p>"Ah, Lucius," Voldemort hissed when they entered. The throne room was empty save for his closest followers. Their masks were off today and Harry could see the faces of his tormentors, equally eager to witness Harry submit or Lucius fail. Severus Snape was in attendance, his face impassive as he took in the scene. Draco was a fine enough boy, but Snape knew this horrible display was just to get Malfoy's goat and nothing else. Snape was pleased to see Granger and Weasley relatively unharmed, but just in case…he fingered the vials in his robe pocket. A contingency…</p>
<p>What should have shocked Harry, but didn't, was Draco Malfoy, clad only in the thinnest of translucent robes, on a pillow by the Dark Lord's feet. He had seen it in his vision, of course, had even felt his pain as he was taken, but Draco had not been aware of him. Now though, Draco turned his head in shame. Lucius ground his teeth.</p>
<p>"So you have done what no one else has done before you, Lucius," Voldemort praised him, "And you have thought to include his friends. How clever of you…"</p>
<p>"We have come to an understanding, my lord. Potter is a Gryffindor, but even he can be bought, just with a different currency. I have promised to release his friends…"</p>
<p>"I see…" Voldemort didn't seem overly concerned with this plan. "Well, Harry?"</p>
<p>Harry looked from Voldemort's greedy face to Lucius' quickly paling one and took a step forward towards the throne. He was shaking, he could feel it. A murmur went up through the crowd.</p>
<p>"Do you submit yourself to me?" Voldemort asked, his eyes blazing.</p>
<p>"I-I…" Harry tried to force the words out, his eyes darting to Hermione and Ron. But the words lodged in this throat, like a spell was keeping them there. He shut his eyes and tried again. "Y-" <em>Yes.</em> It wouldn't come.</p>
<p>Lucius, his resolve snapped, growled in frustration. "You will not make a fool of me, boy! Severus, your assistance please."</p>
<p>Severus stepped away from the crowd, raising the vial of red potion into the light. Harry saw it and paled, but it wasn't just from the threat he was now presented with, a threat he knew would come…it was because Snape was moving closer now, and that secret that Dumbledore had tried so hard to bury, threatened to make itself known.</p>
<p>Harry swayed on his feet. "I-I-I…I CAN'T!" he screamed.</p>
<p>"That's it!" Lucius pulled Hermione's head back and poured the potion down her throat, her eyes becoming glassy as the potion worked through her system.</p>
<p>"Noooooo…" Harry moaned. His eyes sought Voldemort's, confusion lurking in them. "I'm trying dammit!"</p>
<p>Voldemort watched with interest as Harry flailed within himself.</p>
<p>"We don't have time for this," Lucius muttered, knocking Severus' hand out of the way as the potions master went to administer the same potion to Weasley. "<em>Avada Kedavra!"</em></p>
<p>Ron, released from the immobilizing spell, slumped to the ground dead.</p>
<p>"What are you thinking?" Severus hissed in Lucius' ear. "You have just lost your leverage!"</p>
<p>Lucius was not in the listening mood however, as he grabbed Harry and flung him to the ground far away from him. "We had a deal, Potter!"</p>
<p>"I-I tried! Please, I'm telling the truth! I c-can't!" His words were broken by his sobs. "Her-Hermione…R-r-ron…I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry…Please, please, I'm sorry…!"</p>
<p>"Worthless—" Lucius went to backhand the boy, forgetting for a second that he was a wizard, when Voldemort stood from his throne.</p>
<p>"Enough." With that one word, Lucius took a step back and tried to calm himself. Draco looked on horrified. His two one-time classmates murdered before his eyes, and Potter a sobbing mess. Draco couldn't understand it. The Potter he knew would have done anything for his friends. He was sure he would be freed from his current position by the nightfall. Voldemort seemed to have come to a similar conclusion. He studied the boy who seemed rather far gone at the moment, going through any number of possibilities. "It seems, <em>Harry,</em> that we've come to an impasse."</p>
<p>"You wouldn't," Harry whispered, more to himself than to anyone. "You know what I hold, what I carry…"</p>
<p>The red eyes were harsh. "And so, I shall keep you alive, but just barely. If you refuse to submit to me as my willing servant, then you shall serve my followers as their slave, and when you have had enough, you can always <em>beg</em> me to allow you to serve only me."</p>
<p>Harry trembled in on himself, knowing it always had to come to this. Why couldn't he submit? What was stopping him from forcing the words out of his mouth right now?</p>
<p>"And we shall begin now, I do believe," Voldemort said with a chilling smile. He waved his wand and the boy's clothes, so generously given to him by Lucius, disappeared, leaving him once more naked in the circle of his followers. Draco couldn't help but gasp as the boy's body was revealed, showing crisscrossing red lines and welts across his skin. "I may not have your virginity, but at least you will be well trained when I take you…Lucius, you may be the first to go as you have lost the most from his failure." Voldemort gave a sharp tug on Draco's collar, making the boy yelp and reminding Lucius sharply that this was all Harry's fault.</p>
<p>"With pleasure, my lord." Lucius was not a kind person by nature, and the few days he spent upholding such a farce was enough to boil his blood. All that pent up rage he would now unleash upon the boy who refused to break, even for his friends. It was Harry who was the monster here…Lucius carefully divested himself of his clothes, pinning Harry with a gaze that promised pain.</p>
<p>Harry scrambled backwards, before succumbing to the inevitable and shutting his eyes. He could feel Lucius stalking towards him like a predator would his prey. Harry had already suffered through Draco that morning. He would suffer again—</p>
<p>"My lord!" Severus' voice cut through the room, sharp and sudden. "I wish to have the boy."</p>
<p>Lucius gave a feral growl, but stopped in his advances when the Dark Lord held up a hand, head cocked to the side in curiosity. "Severus?"</p>
<p>All eyes were on the potions master, knowing him to be anything but stupid and suicidal. A collective hush stole over the room.</p>
<p>"I will break the boy for you, my lord," Severus continued with a confidence he didn't feel. "My reward for the boy's capture, my lord, would be to mold him for you." He added just the right amount of subservience and flattery, noting out of the corner of his eye that Potter began to shake.</p>
<p>"I see…" Voldemort hissed, even as Bellatrix barked out a maniacal laugh.</p>
<p>"He is incapable of being broken," Bellatrix shrieked. "You <em>dare</em> to presume you can succeed where His most trusted have failed? Where <em>I</em> have failed? You were not even invited to the contest, filthy <em>half-blood!</em>"</p>
<p>Severus didn't pay her any mind. "I have brought the boy to you. Let me finish preparing him, my lord."</p>
<p>"Perhaps…" Voldemort was intelligent. He knew that Severus could spin any truth on its head, and yet, he <em>had</em> killed Dumbledore and brought his horcrux back to him, no matter how murky his loyalties…Still, Bellatrix had raised an important point. This was the Gryffindor who had charged headfirst into the Chamber of Secrets to save his friend, fighting off his horcrux and a basilisk in the process. The same Gryffindor who was incapable of bowing for Weasley and Granger…If the boy truly was unbreakable, then Severus' promise was empty and he was lying through his teeth. So then, what other reason could he have to want his prize…? Voldemort's eyes flashed. Yes, he would use this opportunity test his spy, and if he did manage to succeed, it would be all the better for him. Two birds with one stone… "Severus, he is yours…" the Dark Lord announced, causing Lucius's face to twist up like he smelled something foul.</p>
<p>Severus slowly let out a breath he wasn't aware he'd been holding. On the other side of the room, Harry began to hyperventilate.</p>
<p>"…on one condition."</p>
<p>"My lord?" Severus' heart hammered in his chest.</p>
<p>"You will have a year, Severus, to break the boy. A year. And if he is not broken for me at the end of the year, then I will have to conclude we have a traitor in our midst after all." Voldemort gave a bone chilling smile at his servant, making Severus' victory feel more like a death sentence.</p>
<p>Severus, whose face was usually so blank, seemed to lose what little color it had. "You have my word. Potter will be broken, my lord." He gave a deep bow, his greasy black hair falling forward to hide his face.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. A Vacation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus and Harry talk.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Note rating change for later chapters.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry awoke to shouting in the room beyond. Instincts kicking in, he pretended to still be asleep even though he was confident he was in the room alone. For now at least. He was on some sort of bed. Not quite as luxurious as the one in Malfoy Manor, but certainly a far cry from the dungeons. Slowly, memories from last night began to creep back. Hermione…Ron…he bit his lip to keep from crying out loud.</p><p>Once again, he had been unable to submit to Voldemort and he had yet to understand why. Ruthlessly, he pushed back the idea that it had anything to do with the ache in his chest, knowing as he did so that it had everything to do with why. Before he could follow that train of thought any further though, he would have to deal with the present.</p><p>He remembered Snape claiming him as his reward, stopping Lucius from raping him in front of the inner circle. He should be thankful for small favors. Idly, he wondered why Snape would bother and timidly he wondered if perhaps Snape had a plan after all…Harry nearly snorted aloud. Of course Snape had a plan. The question was, did it involve Harry's survival or sanity in the end?</p><p>Another crash. "I thought you were on my side, Severus!" Lucius shouted. "You told me it would work and all along, you've wanted the boy for yourself!"</p><p>Harry could imagine the potions master's eyes gleaming dangerously, but nothing could have prepared him for what came next. "And who wouldn't, Lucius?" Severus purred. "He's grown up. He isn't quite a boy anymore. And he is the Boy-Who-Lived."</p><p>Lucius laughed. "I know you. That means nothing to you! Tell me truly, why did you claim him? Is it revenge? I would have let you <em>visit </em>him once Draco was freed if that is all it is."</p><p>"Perhaps for the novelty of it," Severus deadpanned.</p><p>This answered displeased the blond. "I'm not a fool and neither is the Dark Lord…I hope, for your sake, you've thought this through."</p><p>"When have I not?"</p><p>Harry could hear the whoosh of the floo activating as Lucius exited. Then the house fell into silence. He strained his ears to hear any approaching footsteps, but he couldn't detect anything. It didn't seem like Snape to leave him alone…wherever here was. He thought on the words he heard and concluded that Snape had likely been trying to put up a front to make the blond go away. At least, he hoped the tripe about being the boy-who-lived had been false. Snape had never cared about that before.</p><p>After a while, Harry finally cracked open his eyes. He was in a sparsely furnished room. Just the bed, a table, and a chair. As unlikely as the thought was, he wondered if he had been taken to Spinner's End, but he dismissed that thought. He couldn't explain it, but the house didn't feel like it was Spinner's End. Snape had no love lost for the place of his childhood abuse and it seemed plausible that he had been taken to an unplottable location within the Dark Lord's stronghold. Spinner's End was just too connected to Snape. Too obvious.</p><p>Hours seemed to pass before Harry felt safe enough to creep out of bed and try the two doors. Escape was impractical, he knew, but he wasn't going to waste his chance of being alone to not explore his surroundings. Unsurprisingly, one of the doors was locked, the one leading out into the rest of the house. The other door led to a small bathroom, and to Harry's great astonishment, there was a set of clean towels and toiletries, seemingly just for him. With any other Death Eater, he might have thought twice about using the facilities, but this was Snape…And if his hunch was correct about the pull in his chest, he knew he was lost, so unbelievably damned. He might was well get a shower out of it.</p><p>He was left alone for the rest of the day when promptly at five o'clock (not that Harry knew what time it was), dinner appeared on the table in his room. It was chicken pot pie and a glass of pumpkin juice. As he supped, he was aware of how unconcerned he was about being poisoned. Maybe, it would even be a relief if he were just simply to disappear…</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Every morning, Harry woke in a cold sweat, the after effects of the cruciatus curse making his hands tremble. With Malfoy and now with Snape, he had been allowed clothes, much to his relief. The thought that perhaps Snape didn't intend to break him after all gave him a little bit of hope, because between the anchor in his chest and his weakened state, he wasn't sure if he could refuse this time around.</p><p>And so the days went…Harry might spend the rest of the day staring out the window, which was magically charmed to show what he assumed was the backyard, though Snape never made an appearance in it. There were some flower beds and a nice willow tree, but nothing to suggest their exact location. He'd shower, for lack of anything better to do, have breakfast, lunch, and dinner, try futilely to stay awake to stave off the nightmares sure to come, and eventually succumb to sleep.</p><p>In a way, Harry preferred it to the pain and the mind games of his prison guards past, but the anticipation was slowly killing him. Surely Snape didn't intend to just keep him here, nothing more than a neglected pet for the entirety of his one year ultimatum. At least, he hoped not.</p><p>It was a week after his initial stay when the routine abruptly changed. Harry sensed it immediately when a presence hovered right outside his door. Not bothering to pretend to sleep, Harry sat up in bed. He craved human contact right now, verbal, physical, anything. Being trapped in a room simply wasn't natural.</p><p>The door opened soundlessly and Snape swept the room with his dark eyes, as if Harry were desperate or stupid enough to lay traps for him, before stepping fully into the room. He was dressed in his usual black robes, lank, greasy hair framing his face, a sneer on his mouth. Without a word, Snape took a seat in the single wooden chair, facing the bed.</p><p>Something in Harry bubbled up, an odd desire to cross the distance between them and try to please the man, but the ache was not yet that strong, and Harry pushed it down. Warily, he wondered how much longer he could do so, and if Snape was aware of the effect he had on him. But that was unlikely. If Snape was aware, he'd have used it by now. No, Harry would put his money on it that the headmaster hadn't told Snape either what might befall Harry after his death. The sentiment was chilling that maybe the headmaster really had trusted no one in the end. For that reason, Harry didn't ask about the headmaster—not wanting to bring any more attention than was absolutely necessary about that time. Instead, he opened his mouth and asked the most pressing concern he currently had.</p><p>"So…" Harry began—Severus quirked an eyebrow, daring him to finish that thought.—"Do you have a plan?"</p><p>"I have brought you before the Dark Lord and claimed you as my reward and that, <em>that</em> is your question?"</p><p>Harry would have felt cowed in any other circumstance, but he had to be strong and push through the irritating <em>other</em> feelings that were threatening to spill through.</p><p>"I assumed you would have a plan…sir. You…" Harry faltered, kicking himself as he brought up the headmaster he swore he wouldn't bring up. "Dumbledore trusted you and honestly, there's no one else at the moment." And wasn't that the truth?</p><p>Snape glared at him over his hooked nose. "I killed your precious headmaster, Potter," he snarled. "Or have you already forgotten in the months during your capture? And yet, you would still trust me after it was my patronus that led you here?"</p><p>"Yes," Harry said defiantly, though when Snape put it that way, it was hard to feel completely assured that he was making the right decision.</p><p>"Then you're a fool!" Snape snapped. He took a deep breath to steady himself, staring stonily at the wall.</p><p>"Professor—"</p><p>"Don't call me that. It's hardly appropriate anymore."</p><p>Appropriate…the word echoed in Harry's head for a moment, seeming to ring hollow given the circumstances, but he conceded. "Fine, <em>Snape</em>. You must know where we are. You could, you could run away <em>with</em> me, back to the Order—"</p><p>Snape let out a harsh laugh. "Potter, the Order is in shambles. Hogwarts and the Ministry have fallen! There is no place to escape to. Even if I were to break your chains and smuggle you out," he said, as if it were the most repulsive chore he could think of, "the Dark Lord would simply torture both of us through the marks we carried until we died or were captured and killed. No, there is no <em>victory</em> for us. There is only survival."</p><p>The conviction in his speech left Harry breathless. He couldn't rule out that the potions master was still at least somewhat loyal to Voldemort, but it seemed that his own survival, like most Slytherins', came first and foremost. And if Harry weren't reading too much into it, it seemed that Harry's survival was also included. He was almost tempted to say, thank you, when his thoughts were interrupted—</p><p>"As it happens, Potter, I do have plan."</p><p>Harry sat up straighter at this, curiosity etched on his features.</p><p>"But then you had to go and botch things up."</p><p>"Me?" Harry asked affronted. "How could I possibly have interfered when I didn't even know you had a plan until now?"</p><p>"Yes, an uncanny ability, that," he sneered. "I am currently working on a potion to break the connection embedded in the Dark Mark. Once that is accomplished, your suggestion of escape might even be feasible, but definitely not before. But now that I'm saddled with <em>you</em>—"</p><p>"Hey, you claimed me!"</p><p>Snape silenced him with a look. "—I find myself with less time to research, brew, and otherwise experiment. If not for your Gryffindor stubbornness to not simply give in to the Dark Lord's demands, I would have likely found a solution by now!"</p><p>There was so much Harry wanted to say to that, such as <em>you haven't spent any time with me all week</em> and <em>how can you possibly ask me to just surrender?</em> His outrage must have showed on his face because Snape held up a hand. "I understand your aversion to bowing to the Dark Lord, I might even sympathize with you that he wants to make you his catamite, but it would have been best if you had simply bowed when asked. His followers have no qualms with taking you when and how they want. It was only <em>his</em> protection that kept you free from that aspect of bodily torture thus far. Submitting would have kept you relatively safe from harm, off limits to the rest of us, and would have bought me- <em>us</em>- some valuable time. Now, I am watched like a hawk with Lucius, hell bent on vengeance, whispering in his ear that perhaps <em>progress reports</em> are in order!"</p><p>Harry shrank back into himself, understanding that what Snape said was right. There was nothing new about rape in war, and he had been relatively fortunate that nothing like that had happened so far. But his luck had run out. Hadn't Snape been granted permission to use him and train him?</p><p>"Sorry," Harry murmured, feeling the need to calm the man, either out of self-preservation or because of that damned ache in his chest. "But, why are you telling all this to me? I'm pants at occlumency, remember? Won't Vol- I mean, won't <em>he</em> just rip this from my mind at his earliest convenience?"</p><p>Snape looked up at him startled. "You can't think I would have told you anything if I weren't fully convinced your occlumency shields would hold?"</p><p>"My-?"</p><p>"Your occlumency shields. I don't know how you've managed to erect barriers around what passes for your mind, but I was unable to get through them multiple times throughout the week."</p><p>That knowledge should have disturbed him, knowing Snape had been in the room likely while he had been unconscious, but he was too shocked to complain about his lack of privacy while in captivity. He had no idea that he was occluding, let alone how he was doing it. Like wandless magic, it was an ability that seemed to just appear after Dumbledore's death. An ability, he knew, that Snape had.</p><p>"But I still get visions," Harry protested. "How can I be blocking you when I can't even stop him?"</p><p>Harry was granted another Look. "It's the horcrux, you idiot boy."</p><p>"Of course, you'd know about that," Harry muttered bitterly. "Did Dumbledore tell you that? Because he sure as hell didn't tell me."</p><p>"No," Snape said, his voice changed. "Dumbledore didn't see fit to inform me."</p><p>A beat of silence fell over the room as Harry struggled to summon the courage to ask about what had been bothering him.</p><p>"These progress reports…" Harry trailed off.</p><p>"Are not your concern," Snape finished. "If they come to pass, I can create constructs that should convince him I am in the process of thoroughly <em>taming</em> you."</p><p>Harry made a face.</p><p>"Unless, you have some objection, Mr. Potter?" Snape asked silkily.</p><p>"No, no, I was…I was just wondering…" Harry knew he was being teased, but his concern was genuine and he pushed through to speak his mind. "If I ever needed to, you know, prove in person that…well, I just don't think that constructs are going to be enough!"</p><p>Snape fixed him with a concerned expression. Possibly the first concerned expression Harry had ever seen on the man's face. "Perhaps I shouldn't be surprised. After all, you gave in to <em>Lucius</em> easily enough."</p><p>Harry glared at him. "I know it was you who told him how to break me. I heard you, the first morning here. How could you tell him what the Dursleys did to me?"</p><p>"I don't see why it should concern you. You didn't break, did you?"</p><p>"No, but—" But only because it was physically impossible to. "—That's beside the point! Why would you ever tell him something like that, that I, wanted to be…treated with kindness?"</p><p>"Are you honestly complaining that I stepped in on your behalf to save you a week's worth of suffering at the end of Lucius' wand? Or that I managed to convince him to give your friends a chance of freedom? That you <em>ruined</em>? I've already discussed why it would have been best if you'd just broken a long time ago. I won't apologize for it."</p><p>"No," Harry snorted, feeling the stabbing pain of loss when he thought of Hermione and Ron. "No, I don't imagine you'd apologized for anything." Snape's eyes flashed and Harry felt the anchor berating him. "I'm sorry, that was uncalled for," Harry heard himself saying, wanting to make it right again. Fortunately, Snape was looking at the floor and didn't notice the panic creeping into Harry's green eyes.</p><p>"Think of this as a vacation," Snape finally said. "I shan't disturb you anymore than is strictly necessary. I will need the time to brew and deal with any other complications that may arise, and because I don't want to hear you whining that you are <em>bored</em>, you are allowed to roam the house and the garden. Don't even bother trying to escape, the consequences—for both of us—would be most dire. We have a year, Potter before you would need to <em>hypothetically</em> please the Dark Lord. A lot can happen in a year."</p><p>Yes, Harry thought. A lot <em>could</em> happen in a year, and nothing that boded well for either of them.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. The Aegis</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Harry makes a plan.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ever since Snape had been in to visit him, Harry was feeling the ache grow strong and stronger. At first, he had tried to push it aside, but he was starting to get the impression now that it would be better to get out in front of it—whatever it was.</p><p>So that morning, Harry sat on his bed and tried to listen to what the weight in his chest was telling him. Unlike the imperius curse, this felt more like a strong suggestion, one that Harry could choose to ignore if needed. It was more like impressions. He got the sense that he would be happier or better off if he could just make Snape happy. Like that was going to happen. If Snape even sensed that Harry was trying to make the man to smile <em>or hug him</em>, his mind supplied, Snape would hex his bollocks off. Yet, with each passing day, he found it harder to come up with adequate reasons why it wouldn't be a good idea to just make the man tea or watch him brew or ask if he needed anything…</p><p>Which was how Harry found himself walking carefully down the stairs, hoping that maybe Snape would be in residence that day. The house he was currently in was sparse, just like his room, but not entirely without character. There were books upon books lining the walls and old coffee mugs left out on the tables. There was a grand dining hall, Harry stumbled across, with stone floors, and a siting space that featured a rather large fireplace. Harry also found the kitchen, well-stocked with fresh groceries and muggle appliances, which was odd, all things considered. Just because Harry couldn't use magic, didn't mean Snape had to live like a muggle. Along the way, he picked up the coffee mugs and returned them to the kitchen. It seemed that whatever duties the house-elf had, it wasn't to clean up after the potions master. That was fine. It gave Harry something to do, something which made the little ache in his chest lighten just a bit.</p><p>It was on his third trip to the kitchen that he noticed the door he had written off as a closet before. Of course, Harry thought, and found himself walking down into the basement. Now that he was on the same level, he could hear the soft simmering of potions in the room beyond. Then he heard Snape mutter to himself and he couldn't help but grin at his small victory. The other half of him was mildly worried that this was what passed as a victory these days, but the stronger half wanted to whoop for joy. He wasn't alone. Snape was here and Snape would protect him…He would examine his thoughts later. For now, he crept along the corridor until he was right outside the lab, peering in through the crack in the door.</p><p>Snape was hovering over a cauldron, stirring rod in one hand and wand in the other. His greasy hair was catching all the more fumes. If this was how Snape always brewed, Harry thought, his hair didn't stand a chance. Yet, there was something graceful in the way Snape held the stirring rod, something hypnotizing in those focused dark eyes that were staring right at him and—</p><p>"Potter," Snape barked, having endured the boy's staring for over ten seconds, wondering if the boy was stupid enough to try and kill him then and there. "Don't just stand in the doorway, get in."</p><p>"Oh." Harry expected to be kicked out right away and wasn't sure where to stand now that he was inside the cramped laboratory.</p><p>"I assume you need something or you wouldn't be down here bothering me during this very <em>important</em> work." His eyes were piercing.</p><p>Harry swallowed. "I…" What could he say? That he was getting jittery and that he wanted the man to reach out and touch him<em>? Snape, please hold my hand.</em> Yes, that would go over well.</p><p>"I'm waiting, Mr. Potter."</p><p>"Harry," he blurted out without thinking, mentally berating himself for it. "I'd rather you call me Harry," he added in a smaller voice.</p><p>Snape glowered. "And why, would I do that?"</p><p>"Because Hermione and Ron are dead, and no one else is going to call me Harry. I just need to be reminded of who I am, that I am human," Harry said, not sure if he was lying or being far more truthful than he meant to.</p><p>There was a beat of silence.</p><p>"Fine, <em>Harry</em>." Severus put down the stirring rod and cast what seemed to be a stasis charm on his potion, before stalking across the room to glare down at the boy who dared to bother him. "What brings you down to my lab, <em>Harry</em>?" His face was an inch from his. Snape's breath ghosted over his face, the same herbal scents from the potions ingredients, bringing him back to the night in the forest…The thing in Harry's chest filled him with warmth. "And for the love of Merlin, boy, do not say you were bored."</p><p>"I was—" Harry suddenly realized he was going to use just that excuse and flushed.</p><p>Snape sighed dramatically. "Idiot Gryffindors…Fine, make yourself useful."</p><p>"You're going to let me help you brew?" Harry asked dubiously.</p><p>"Merlin forbid we ever reach that point."</p><p>"So what do you want me to do?" Harry asked, looking around the cluttered workspace, and hoping it wouldn't be anything like his detentions of dissecting frog guts or snake eyes.</p><p>Snape walked around the table and deftly picked up a small tome. "I would like you to read this for me and translate it."</p><p>Harry took the book from him and curiously flipped through the pages. They were yellow and fragile, but nothing remarkable. "Can't you read it?" Harry asked stupidly, realizing that Snape would not have asked otherwise.</p><p>"It's in parselscript, Po-Harry," Snape explained, crossing his arms over his chest. "I obtained it from Slytherin's study in the Chamber of Secrets. I have reason to believe it could hold the key to…loosening the Dark Mark from my person."</p><p>Harry frowned down at the book, remembering the last book he saw in the Chamber. Then another thought struck him. "How'd you get down in the Chamber of Secrets, Snape? You need to be a parselmouth to get in there."</p><p>Snape leisurely stirred his concoction again, adding some dried flowers to the mix. "I'm the Head of Slytherin. I'm afforded certain privileges," he stated. "Now, if you could be so kind to leave me to my work?"</p><p>Nothing outward made Harry suspect that Snape was lying. His face was the same as it always was, unreadable and haughty. Hell, it was likely enough that Salazar would have let the head of his house gain entry into his rooms, but something just felt off about his statement, seconded by the little ache in his chest.</p><p>"Oh," Harry said neutrally, being extra careful to not betray his own secrets. He ducked his head so that Snape couldn't see into his eyes, occlumency shields or not. "I'll be right on it then." He must have imagined it, but he thought he heard, just as the door swung shut, a small "Thank you."</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Harry found a stack of parchment and some muggle pens in the desk drawer in the study. The study held a desk with a lamp, more books than Harry could count, some mugs with dried up tea bags in them, and another fireplace. It didn't seem like Snape really lived here, at least, not all the time. It was just too empty and too un-Snapelike. He again favored the theory that this was one of Voldemort's safe houses turned prison cell, and he wondered if Snape was just as much a prisoner here as he was. After all, if Snape couldn't deliver on his promise, he'd be the one killed, not Harry. And as much as Harry didn't understand about him, he didn't want Snape dead. That lit a fire under Harry's arse to get to translating. The plan, he had to help Snape with his plan…</p><p>The book itself was unexceptional and seemed written in English to Harry, who had to blink a few times before seeing the swiggles and dots appear on the page. He hadn't even known there was a thing called parselscript! At first, Harry was just blindly translating, word for word, but then he started to try to understand the words, even if the translation made it hard at times.</p><p>
  <em>…bonds for marriages, for unions, could be made equal or unequal at the binder's choosing…a rite for the destruction of one's enemy…a spell to keep one's furry currency—no— cattle from wandering off…a ritual for destined couples…</em>
</p><p>It seemed that the book contained things that sounded rather dark to Harry, but also very mundane things like keeping one's farm in order. He thought of Voldemort ever having a flock of sheep and laughed to himself, before wondering if that's exactly how Voldemort viewed his Death Eaters, as sheep to keep in line…Harry shuddered. He diligently translated all of the first chapter <em>How to bond your familiar to you</em> and part of the second chapter <em>Enslaving your enemy's progeny for familial alliances</em>, before resting his head on the desk. Wouldn't it just be more efficient if he skimmed the book for parts relating to slavery with marks than it would be to translate the entire body of work?</p><p>With that thought in mind, Harry thumbed through the chapters. It seemed Salazar hadn't bothered to add an index. Finally, Harry settled on a section that seemed to talk of apparition. There, that sounded Dark Mark-ish.</p><p>
  <em>…the one with the Aegis will be drawn towards the one who wields the sword. This dynamic ensures that the protected will stay loyal to the one they serve, while also obligating the protector to ensure the life of their protected…</em>
</p><p>Harry shook his head. That sounded too much like a protection spell, and when had Voldemort ever hesitated to throw an Avada Kedavra towards one of his own? Still, it intrigued Harry. Hadn't his mother cast some sort of protection spell on him at the moment of her death?</p><p>
  <em>…the Aegis will appear on the wrist of the protected as the bond matures, culminating in consummation. Until that time, the Aegis will seek the most suitable protector in mind, body, and soul, and may be transferred without the initial binder's consent if the initial binder is indisposed. Steeped in the intent to protect, the bond will dissolve when the threat has been eliminated…the Aegis will seek to please the binder and will be unable to swear fealty to any other. The Aegis will lend the binder the power to protect what is theirs, funneling the bonded's magic through the connection, even able to pull on Time…The Aegis will urge the binder to protect their own and may bring feelings of possessiveness and envy to the fore…</em>
</p><p>Harry looked up abruptly, scanning the room for signs of Snape. He hadn't thought the man had come up, but it was with a great sense of terror that he slammed the book shut. Snape couldn't know of this, Harry thought. He could not <em>afford</em> to know of this.</p><p>Everything starting falling into place then: his inability to bow and break for the Dark Lord, his recent fixation on Snape, his newfound abilities of occlumency and wandless magic…even, his unquestionable loyalty to Dumbledore, which had ended the moment the man had fallen off the tower…</p><p>Harry understood this all, emotions crashing inside of him. Hermione and Ron had not died because of his unwillingness. They had died because Dumbledore had cast a protection spell on him and taken that knowledge away from him. That was what Dumbledore had been setting him free from…With his death, Dumbledore had hoped to break the Aegis between them, not realizing that the incomplete bond (Harry was grateful Dumbledore had had a conscience at least to not consummate it) latched on to what it deemed to be his most suitable protector: Severus Snape.</p><p>And if the bond were consummated now…Harry shuddered. He didn't trust the man completely, and now all his newfound warm and fuzzy feelings for the potions master couldn't even be trusted. Was it just the bond that had made him thus far relaxed in what basically amounted to his prison? He hadn't tried to escape once, just gathered old coffee mugs and brought them to the sink…</p><p>Then, with utmost trepidation, Harry checked his wrist, carefully moving the magic-suppressing chain so he could get a look beneath. Nothing. Thank Merlin for small favors! But he wasn't deluded. If Harry knew anything about Dumbledore's love of ancient magic and secret tomes of Salazar's binding rituals, then he was far from out of the woods.</p><p>Harry bit his lip and quietly sat up from the desk. He stacked the pieces of parchment with the translation and slipped them into the drawer. He could manage the Aegis, he told himself. He would just have to get out ahead of it, make sure the bond was never desperate enough to make him do something he didn't want. That meant making Snape tea (or coffee, as it appeared) or finding ways to do small favors that Snape didn't need to know anything about…</p><p>The words echoed in Harry's mind "<em>the bond will dissolve when the threat has been eliminated."</em> So it seemed there was a way out after all, by killing Voldemort. And wasn't that what Snape was already trying to do to save his own hide? Harry snorted.</p><p>All he had to do was make sure Snape lived long enough to succeed in his potion, and then, when the Dark Mark was gone, they could find a way to take him down. Perhaps, even, Snape could find a way to modify his potion to extract the horcrux from his scar, and then, when Voldemort was truly dead, the Aegis would let Harry free.</p><p>Harry crept back up the stairs and into his room. The plan would work…it had to…</p><p>But one thing kept niggling at the back of Harry's mind. In the event that Snape couldn't complete the potion by year's end, Harry would be presented to the Dark Lord unbroken, and Snape would be killed on the spot, thus leaving the Aegis free to latch onto a new protector…one powerful enough to subdue the old one…</p><p>It was a matter of practicality, Harry thought to himself. He would just have to keep them both alive, and if that meant jumping through whatever hoops Voldemort had planned for them, then so be it.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Making Tea</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Harry makes a beverage.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>Please, Professor Dumbledore, please. I can't. Please, don't make me go back there, I'll be good. Please! I promise!"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Albus' face was turned away from his. He had refused to look at Harry all summer, as if Harry were something disgusting or tainted…dirty.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I was wrong to believe I could shield you from this war, Harry. This is for your own good. This training is what you need to win against Voldemort."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Harry's voice cracked as he fell to his knees. He grabbed the old man's dark purple robes. "I'm begging you, Professor Dumbledore. Please."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The man moved away abruptly, leaving Harry to touch his forehead to the floor. Vaguely, he was aware of the floo activating and another presence settling behind him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"No, Harry. I'm sorry, but I'd rather you lived and hated me, then died and loved me. It is a small sacrifice I am willing to make…for the Greater Good."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>A heavy hand descended on Harry's shoulder. A strong, unbreakable grip.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Come, Mr. Potter. I think, we might finally be making progress."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Harry was none-too-gently forced headfirst into the floo network. "Department of Mysteries!" the gruff voice shouted. The feeling of being sucked through a pipe…Harry gasping for breath as a hand came around his throat and shoved him up against the wall. Moody's magical eye examining him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Now, you're going to make this up to me, Potter…"</em>
</p><p>Harry's eyes snapped open. He catapulted himself off the bed, staggered to the bathroom, and promptly evacuated the contents of his stomach into the toilet. What was that? Had that really been Mad-Eye Moody? He could feel his body shaking even though there wasn't a draft in the room. He flushed and began to rinse his mouth out in the sink.</p><p>The feel of Moody's hands on his person. His magical eye, undressing him even when he was fully clothed. Dumbledore, surely, hadn't condoned, hadn't known about…His vision began to darken. No, no, he couldn't have a break down now.</p><p>Harry tried to collect himself. It could be a false memory, Harry thought. A construct like the one Voldemort had made to lure him to the ministry…but somehow, he didn't think so. When had this occurred? He thought back to the end of fourth year, when they discovered the real Moody hidden in the trunk, a prisoner of Barty Crouch Jr. It was possible that the Moody in his memory was Crouch in disguise, but there was something so frightfully terrifying about the intensity of Moody's eyes, something that Crouch, for all his madness, never achieved. It was brought about by years of paranoia, PTSD, and likely exacerbated by being locked in a trunk for a year at the mercy of a Death Eater. Now that Harry thought about it, it was strange that Moody has stopped coming around to Order meetings sometime in his fifth year. At the time, he had chalked it up to Moody being busy. Dumbledore certainly hadn't given an explanation, and why should he have? Hadn't they all been busy? But Moody hadn't been at the battle of the Department of Mysteries either…</p><p>Breathe…breathe…What was it Snape had always said? Clear your mind? So Harry tried to do just that. He had occlumency shields now, didn't he? Snape had said so. And just like Snape, he could learn to lock painful memories away. Perhaps, this was why he could no longer feel the pains of Bellatrix's knife as she skinned him alive, or the impacts of Goyle's fist against his cracked rib cage…Something told Harry that this was probably unhealthy, but he just couldn't deal with the weight and the pain of it all right now. So he carefully funneled all his agonies deep into his mind and left the room.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Severus muttered to himself as he arranged the new shipment of ingredients on his workbench. They were rare, precious—Severus couldn't afford to lose track of them and meticulously labeled each jar and flask. Despite having most of his soul intact, the Dark Lord was still an incredibly unreasonable and impatient master. He had one year. It went without saying that he was unlikely to get an extension.</p><p>The wards flared, alerting him that the boy had just entered the basement level.</p><p>"You better have finished that translation before bothering me again, P-Harry," Severus threatened as Harry cautiously entered the potions master's domain.</p><p>"Um…"</p><p>Was it too much to hope for that the boy actually did his homework on time, when he had all the time in the world? Severus looked up then, startled when the saw what the boy was holding.</p><p>"Tea?" Harry asked carefully. When Severus didn't respond, he held up the other mug. "Er, coffee? It's…it's not poisoned, Snape," he added as an afterthought, as if it weren't abundantly obvious. If Harry killed him, he'd kill them both. Besides, Snape had already cast a silent detection spell on the two mugs and ascertained that they were safe for consumption.</p><p>Snape took the coffee mug, brushing Harry's hand accidently, his eyes never leaving Harry's face. It was clear he suspected something. Even if it wasn't poison, it wasn't like Potter to start serving tea and coffee like he was running a café.</p><p>Harry gave a small smile as Severus took the first sip and Snape cast the spell again, frowning into the mug, just to make sure he hadn't missed anything. Harry took a sip of the tea leftover, averting his eyes as the Aegis settled. Perfect. He had gotten in his millisecond of physical contact and made the man coffee. Maybe this Aegis was more manageable than he thought.</p><p>"Who would have ever thought that a Potter would be serving me coffee," Snape remarked snidely, when he was convinced the drink was after all completely innocent. "Perhaps there is an upside to Stockholm Syndrome after all."</p><p>Harry took an abrupt step backward. So maybe Snape <em>would</em> find fixing him drinks suspicious. "Molly serves tea to everyone at Order meetings," Harry countered with what he hoped was a reasonable tone of voice and a blasé shrug. "It's not a big deal. I just thought, since we'll be living together and all, that you might want a cup…you leave them lying around the house, you know. It's a bit hard not to notice."</p><p>Snape studied his face once more before nodding seriously. "Well, in that case, Harry, thank you."</p><p>Harry beamed at him, and before he could do let something slip, exited the lab, the Aegis humming approvingly within him.</p><p>It seemed that the Aegis was rather active these days, considering Harry must have had one with the headmaster without his knowledge for at least a year. Likely two, if his memories could be trusted. He supposed it had to do with the fact that he was actively in danger now, in his enemy's possession, and the Aegis was always designed to be a protection bond. Perhaps, it was just eager to be completed so close to its binder when the threat of death surrounded him. But, hadn't Harry always felt pressured to please the headmaster? Make him proud or rush headlong into danger to be the perfect weapon? The perfect Gryffindor golden boy? He had fed that potion to the headmaster despite his better judgement, and all for naught, as the locket hadn't even been real…Maybe the Aegis had been at work then, but within the safety of Hogwarts' walls, hadn't had the opportunity to flare up.</p><p>Or, more likely, perhaps the headmaster had done something else to complicate his life…</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Severus had been trying to be more provoking than anything else when he questioned the boy about Stockholm syndrome two weeks ago. Now, he wasn't so sure. Every day, the boy sought out his company to give him a steaming mug of coffee or tea—as the occasion warranted. Which wouldn't have been so terrible, if Harry just put down the mug and left. But instead, the boy's hand would linger over the mug, catching just the barest of hints of Snape's own skin as he accepted it.</p><p>Even that in itself wouldn't be cause for alarm, but it wasn't just that. It was the odd little gestures of Harry brushing him when they passed in the halls, or bumping into him by accident more than what could be afforded by chance and myopia. Harry was even insisting on eating with him at the dining room table, bringing down his plate of food from his bedroom, and silently slipping into the chair beside him.</p><p>It concerned him.</p><p>Tonight was no different, as Harry sat curled on the couch, Salazar's book open in his lap. The boy had worked through the first half of the book quite diligently, the proof, a stack of parchment paper with his slightly messy handwriting on the table before him. There was nothing outwardly different about the boy. His emerald green eyes were the same, maddening, bright…but his pupils weren't dilated. Harry also didn't seem to be indulging in any substance abuse that he was aware of or any self-destructive extracurriculars. He was the same as he'd always been: brash, irresponsible, foolhardy Gryffindor, who had also just been through a few months of torture and abuse, and who also tried to catch snatches of physical contact from his most hated professor and serve him tea…</p><p>No, it was very concerning.</p><p>Absently, Severus reached out to grab the next page of the translation, when Harry's hand also coincidentally reached for the paper at the same time.</p><p>"Oh, I—" Harry stuttered, as if it were an accident—and Severus would have believed him too if it didn't keep happening—and made to pull his hand away. It was always just the briefest moments of contact, he observed, like Harry didn't <em>really</em> want to touch Snape, but did so anyway. This time however, Snape was faster, grabbing Harry's wrist tightly, his hand closing around the cold metal chain that kept his magic at bay. Harry's eyes grew wide as saucers.</p><p>It was time to get some answers.</p><p>"What is the meaning of this, Harry?" Severus asked, gesturing with his other hand between the two of them. "You've been finding ways to seek contact all week. I'd like to know what little game you've gotten into your head to play before you get us both killed!"</p><p>Harry flushed, attempting to wrench his hand free, but not having the will to escape. "I—"</p><p>"And don't even try to deny it! You may be able to occlude now, but you're still a terrible liar."</p><p>Harry's heart fluttered in his chest from the extended contact. He hadn't thought he was being that smooth, but certainly not that obvious. It wasn't like he had been <em>throwing</em> himself at Snape.</p><p>"I…I just need the contact," Harry finally said in a very small voice.</p><p>"You—?" Severus asked, bewildered.</p><p>"Not especially from you," Harry lied. "It's just been…hard, you know? I'm used to Molly and Hermione's hugs and Ron comforting me after waking me up from my nightmares. I…I miss it. And it's not like you'd bloody give me a hug if I asked!"</p><p>"I should think not!"</p><p>"So you see…" Harry trailed off, like it was obvious. "I'm sorry it's made you uncomfortable, I—" but what could Harry promise? That he wouldn't do that anymore? Wouldn't try to seek out the contact he so desperately needed? "I just…I feel like I'm losing my mind and I just <em>need</em> something."</p><p>Snape had gone very quiet. The boy claimed he needed contact and had obviously needed it badly enough to seek it from him, snatching it quickly, knowing he'd be denied. Not for the first time, Severus wondered if Harry wasn't broken because he was something worse: intact and positively twisted. Who knew the after effects of what Bellatrix or MacNair or Rosier had done to him? Usually, their victims were not left alive…</p><p>The boy's head was lowered, and dear Merlin, was that a tear leaking from his eyes? For a second, Severus entertained the thought of actually doing what he promised the Dark Lord he would do. Wouldn't it be better, all things considered, to just mold the boy before he became something else Severus could neither control nor predict? He immediately pushed that thought away. No, he would not break Harry Potter. He could not add that crime to the ever growing list of his sins…</p><p>"Please, I…I'm sorry. I just need it," Harry said softly. "It's just the nightmares and the memories and Hermione used to just hold me and…I know I'm the last person on earth you'd want to…comfort, but…"</p><p>Severus had never seen anything look so pathetic, except perhaps for a baby bird that had gotten knocked out of the nest during a storm, and couldn't fly back up again…It certainly wasn't pity that stirred his heart, nor kindness, nor the ever present weight of guilt, or the emerald eyes which seemed to beg him to <em>do</em> something, the way they had when the boy lay under him in the snow.</p><p>Severus sighed, as he spoke the words he never wanted to say. "Do you…want to talk about it?"</p><p>And as Harry spoke of the time Hermione had carded her fingers through his hair while they were still on the run, Harry thought smugly to himself that maybe, just maybe, he wasn't such a terrible liar after all.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Care</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus has come to care for the boy after all.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Note that chapter 1 of 5 of "Intermission" has been posted. It is a short bridge that directly follows this story before its proper sequel. It  may not make sense until all of this story has been written and posted, but I couldn't contain myself.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>…<em>Harry was chained to the wall, the skin around his wrists chaffed and bloodied. It was another day of training, deep in the depths of the Department of Mysteries. Of course, Dumbledore had not listened…Had refused to even let him explain.</em></p><p>
  <em>"Jaggers! McCalister!" Moody barked. "Dumbledore has asked us to teach Potter a lesson."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Of course, it would be our pleasure…"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Harry whimpered, knowing what was to come.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Constant vigilance, boy!" Moody spoke, his breath tickling the shell of his ear. "If you were captured , you would break so easily. But you can't break what's already broken. You see? Dumbledore knows this and we have generously agreed to assist him. By the time we're through with you boy, you'll understand that mercy doesn't exist…"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Please, Moody!" A cutting curse. The taste of blood. "I'm sorry….!"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…The scene changed, the floor dissolving and swallowing him whole. Harry was looking into the twinkling blue eyes of Albus Dumbledore. Harry was fully clothed, sitting in the headmaster's office. His hand was still lightly bleeding from the blood quill, but he couldn't trust Dumbledore to take care of him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Harry, if I had known…"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Known what? How Moody broke him in two? How Jaggers and McCalister panted in his ear as they came?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I understand, headmaster. It needed to be done." But it didn't, not really. He just wanted to leave.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You're wrong," Dumbledore said firmly, standing up to his full height. Harry could only look dully at him. His fear response just wasn't the same as it used to be. He was skittish and fearless at odd turns. He knew there was some truth to what Moody had told him over and over again: you can't break what's already been broken. And Harry was, well and truly broken.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Professor, please, you don't have to apologize." he couldn't listen to this anymore. He was done with these half-baked apologies. The excuses. He had endured Moody's stares at Order meetings. They were still allies in this war. Harry was just being sacrificed—again. He understood this.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"No, Harry, you don't understand. It is my job to protect you and I have failed. And I will not fail again."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"What do you—?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I will protect you, Harry. You shouldn't have to live with these memories, but they are too ingrained to remove." Dumbledore pulled his wand from his sleeve.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You're…" Harry didn't like the sound of that, jumping up and running towards the door. The last time someone had pointed a wand to his head and tried to obliviate him was Lockhart. He couldn't let that happen again. He would not…The door was locked. Stupid! Why had he tried to run? Didn't he know by now that mercy never came?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The world went black, and when he woke up, he was sitting in the headmaster's office like nothing had ever happened.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Ah, Severus, thank you for coming so quickly. I would like you to teach Harry, here, occlumency."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Severus' lip had curled. He surveyed Potter with disdain…Harry didn't look much happier, and yet, he felt much lighter…</em>
</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Severus usually cast a spell on Harry's door when the screaming started, not wanting to bother with another one of Potter's quirks. He had a year of this insanity. He couldn't possibly afford to stay awake each night, hearing the boy's tortured screams well into the dawn. And yet, Severus found himself thinking over what the boy had said to him that evening.</p><p>Surely, if Granger and Weasley were here, they'd comfort him. But they weren't here, and Weasley would not be again. Another tortured scream. Why hadn't he cast a silencing charm like he had the nights before? Maybe, because he…no, he didn't care. That was absurd.</p><p>Severus' room was on the other end of the hallway. Technically, Harry was supposed to be in his room, chained to the foot of the bed, but he was never one for dramatics. It was a large house, one of many the Dark Lord had acquired in case of emergencies. It was equipped with muggle appliances as well, in the event that magic couldn't be used for any length of time. In other words, if the Dark Lord were forced into hiding, which seemed rather unlikely given the course of the war. With three bedrooms upstairs, Severus had quickly decided which one to keep his prisoner in, which was, naturally, as far away from his room as possible.</p><p>Somehow, Severus found himself now standing in front of it. Another anguished cry. Severus pushed open the door.</p><p>The boy was tangled in his sheets again, his hands clutching the headboard, like they were tied there above his head. His hips bucked and he continued to cry. The position was awkward. It looked like the boy was in pain, and Severus could see the sleep pants riding low on his hips…He should wake the boy up. His face was scrunched in pain.</p><p>"Please," Harry moaned. "S-stop…"</p><p>Severus froze, watching the body writhe on the sheets. It didn't make sense. "Potter," he called.</p><p>The boy didn't hear.</p><p>"POTTER!"</p><p>More mumbling.</p><p>"Oh, for the love of—POTTER!" he grabbed the boy's shoulders and shook him gently. The boy's eyes lolled open, then fell shut again. His body tensed, then he grabbed Snape's arms suddenly and started to cry in earnest.</p><p>"Please, Professor Dumbledore…"</p><p>It was starting to scare him. The boy kept crying harder. Acting on instinct, Severus gathered the boy in his arms and sat on the edge of the bed, just cradling the boy to his chest. What had he told him again? That Granger would brush his hair with her hands? He reached for the top of Potter's head, his black hair a rat's nest, like petting a rabid cat.</p><p>"Shhhh," Severus said, rubbing circles on his back over the t-shirt that was stuck to it with sweat.</p><p>"No…" Harry mumbled again, giving a quiet shudder. "No mercy…"</p><p>"You're here, Potter, you're—" <em>Safe? In the Dark Lord's prison?</em> "You're alive. You're here." <em>What comforting words, Severus, </em>he chided himself. <em>That</em> will surely bring the boy some comfort.</p><p>He could hear the boy's heart beating frantically against his own chest, the boy's arms around his waist, clinging to him like a ragdoll. Potion stained fingers carded through the his wild black hair. Was this how Granger had done it? Didn't she realize how incredibly intimate it was? But then, Ron had hugged him too. They had been <em>friends</em>.</p><p>Bitterly, Severus thought back to when he would wake alone in the Slytherin dormitories. No one had ever held <em>him</em> like this, comforted <em>him</em> after a night terror…</p><p>The body began to still.</p><p>"Severus?" Emerald eyes gleamed up at him in the darkness. A blink. Was the boy still dreaming or was he finally awake?</p><p>"You were…having a nightmare," Snape by way of explanation, as if it weren't abundantly obvious. Belatedly, he realized the boy had used his first name. He would let it slide. For now. "I came to offer you…comfort."</p><p>Harry pulled away from him, attempting to make out his face in the dim light that streamed in from the hallway. "You never have before," Harry mumbled sleepily.</p><p>True. "Your behavior was concerning me." Not a lie. "If you need this comfort, I shall attempt to provide it while you're in my—" <em>Custody? Care?</em> There were no words that were appropriate. Despite his declaration earlier, this was no vacation.</p><p>"Thank you…" The arms tightened around him. <em>A hug</em>. Then the boy's eyes drifted shut, the Aegis thrumming, sending waves of <em>Safety</em> through his exhausted body.</p><p>"You're welcome."</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Snape entered through the front doors. Why should he not? He was a Death Eater and Hogwarts was the Dark Lord's.</p><p>The corridors seemed colder than before. The lively chatter of students, ominously absent. The Carrows had certainly left their mark. Severus passed no one on his way to the headmistress' office, knowing that class was in session. With the Dark Lord's soul more intact, his sanity seemed to have return to him. The Dark Lord had thoughtfully selected Narcissa Malfoy to run Hogwarts, and Severus couldn't have been more grateful that he was spared the mind bending gymnastics that would have surely ensued had he been given the position instead.</p><p>Narcissa was calculating and coldly polite—when she wanted to be. Her owl had come unexpectedly that morning. <em>Of course, you may see what I've done with the place. –N.M.</em></p><p>Severus stopped suddenly, in the corridor outside the stairwell leading to the headmistress' office. A tingle ran up his spine and he turned, wand sliding down his sleeve and inconspicuously into his palm.</p><p>"You have some <em>nerve</em> coming back here, Severus."</p><p>Minerva stood behind him, some feet away. Her own wand in her hand, but she didn't seem intent on using it. Her face seemed to have aged in years since he had last seen her, her wrinkles appearing more pronounced and her head carrying more white hairs than he remembered.</p><p>Severus straightened. "Minerva…"</p><p>She took a step forward. "He trusted you," she hissed lowly, the pain forced out in four syllables.</p><p>He could feel her desire to curse him, but hoped she had the presence of mind to not attempt it. He wouldn't be able to interfere if she overstepped her bounds.</p><p>"I'm only here to see the headmistress," Severus said evenly.</p><p>"That's surprising," Minerva said, eyes flashing. "I thought you already had meetings where you exchanged news."</p><p>"Unfortunately, there are some I need to speak with who can only be found in the castle."</p><p>The meaning hung in the air between them. Minerva looked uncertain for a moment, as if afraid to hope.</p><p>"Ah, Severus, punctual as always," Narcissa Malfoy's voice was pleasant as she took in the scene before her, but her sharp blue eyes belied her tone. "Come in, come in…"</p><p>The headmistress' office was much the same as before. Too much clutter, Narcissa had said. And truth be told, she was hesitant to move anything before she knew what it did. She did, however, add a few flowers to the room, changed the curtains, the rug, and the chairs. It was an odd mixture of Dumbledore's eccentric tastes and the Malfoy's love of luxury. Severus was aware of the portrait's eyes even before he truly glanced at it.</p><p>"You got my note," Narcissa said, straight to the point.</p><p>"Obviously."</p><p>Narcissa sat in the chair behind the desk, gesturing for Severus to take a seat in the armchair across from her. The chair itself was comfortable. The position, too familiar for Severus to feel comfortable with.</p><p>"I appreciate what you did for me," Narcissa said softly, losing some of her pretense. "But I am afraid I have lost my son again."</p><p>"He isn't dead," Severus corrected her.</p><p>"No, he is just a plaything for that—"</p><p>"Narcissa!"</p><p>"Yes, yes, I know." Her eyes were steely. "This is not how I imagined victory…you know I have contacted the Order."</p><p>"Undoubtedly. And they have agreed to rescue Draco because they are <em>Gryffindors</em>."</p><p>"Of course," Narcissa sniffed. "I wouldn't have gone to them otherwise. They aren't much pleased with you, Severus. They're only agreeing because I promised them Potter in exchange."</p><p>"You will need to wait until the potion is complete," Severus reminded her harshly. "Otherwise, Potter and I are dead, which I know is no great concern of yours, but Gryffindors are a temperamental breed. They'll kill Draco on the spot, suspecting foul play when Potter ends up dead within a week."</p><p>"We've been over this. I will wait a year if I must, but <em>only</em> if I must."</p><p>Malfoys, Severus thought, always so entitled, thinking the world revolved around them and their needs. He was working, damn her, working towards his freedom and his peace! Of course, he wanted to succeed before the year was up!</p><p>"I apologize. I know I'm not your master, and that I should very well be bowing down to you," Narcissa said, looking away. "I just can't stand the thought of Draco suffering…victory wasn't supposed to be like this."</p><p>Spare me, Severus thought, but inwardly he agreed. She gave a deep sigh and stood up. "You have ten minutes," Narcissa said and swept out of the room.</p><p>The door clicked shut.</p><p>And finally, finally, Severus slowly lifted his eyes to the portrait that hung from the wall.</p><p>"Albus…" Severus' voice broke for the first time as those twinkling blue eyes peered down at him. "I would grovel before your frame, but it appears we don't have much time."</p><p>"My boy," Albus replied. "It is unfortunate, but I have died as I intended. You are now trusted in Voldemort's ranks and Harry is…It has come to my attention that you have claimed the boy."</p><p>"Only to protect him!" Severus snapped, the old wound reopening. For all his sacrifices, Dumbledore was still so ready to believe the worst of him. "And if you had heard, you would know that there are plans already in place to save him!"</p><p>"Forgive me, I only meant that I am proud of your foresight," Albus said, looking pensive. "He is safest with you. I'm sure even he knows it. It is unfortunate that Voldemort only gave you a year. In time, I am sure you would have learned to get over your childish hatred of each other."</p><p>"I…I do not hate him."</p><p>"Oh?" Albus looked down at him, like a father would a son discovering something new, like watching snowfall for the first time.</p><p>"Actually, I am…concerned for the boy," Severus bit out. He was sure that if he called him <em>Harry</em>, the headmaster would faint, painting or not. "They tortured him for weeks, Albus. I think it has unhinged him."</p><p>"Hmmm."</p><p>"He seems to seek physical affection," Severus continued, "He's suggested that I, that I <em>hug </em>him."</p><p>"Hmmm."</p><p>"And he makes me coffee!"</p><p>"Is that the extent of his odd behavior?" Albus asked.</p><p>Snape glared.</p><p>"Then I see no problem. He's been hurt badly in the past, Severus. Seeking a hug, yes, even from you, is not a cause for worry. It's actually expected. And as for making you drinks, Severus? Is that really so hard to fathom? Harry going out of his way to make the people around him happy?"</p><p>"Yes!" <em>Albus wasn't getting it. </em>"It feels forced, Albus. Wrong. He kept brushing his hand against mine when he thought I wouldn't catch him and he's even had the gall to suggest that I should <em>touch him</em> just to keep the Dark Lord off our backs!"</p><p>"That seems like a rather practical plan of Harry's."</p><p>Severus reeled back. "You're not disgusted at the thought of me touching your precious golden boy?" Severus asked as nastily as he could.</p><p>"Well, I didn't say to go along with it, Severus." Albus fixed him with a shrewd look over his half-moon spectacles. The twinkling in his eyes no less dim than when he had been alive. "Severus, what is this really about? Are you upset because he seems to want to be closer to you, knowing there is no one else around, or are you upset because you actually enjoy it?"</p><p>"Of course I'm upset that I enjoy it! When he lets me hold him through his nightmares, it makes me feel <em>good</em>." <em>Like I'm worth something. Like I'm needed. </em>"Is that what you want to hear?"</p><p>Albus nodded. "And you feel protective over him?"</p><p>"Of course! When have I not?"</p><p>"And you are sure you will not act on these <em>feelings</em> other than to protect him?" Albus confirmed.</p><p>"What? I thought you said there was nothing wrong with it!"</p><p>Albus shifted in his frame. "I said, Severus, that there was nothing wrong with offering Harry physical affection. A hug here or there won't kill you. But you must not, under any circumstances, <em>use him </em>to satisfy your <em>needs</em>, no matter how <em>good</em> it makes you feel. Are we clear?"</p><p>"Albus!" Severus stood up, shaking with rage. He was unsure at what moment that the conversation had twisted so far, so fast. "I would never—! How dare you suggest—! You cannot possibly believe that I would—!"</p><p>But Albus was shaking his head sadly. "Severus, I won't make you swear any vows. I doubt I could as a portrait, even so…I want what is best for Harry, Severus, and I have made mistakes in the past. I could not live with myself if I knew that I had hurt him yet again."</p><p>"Good thing you don't have to," Severus said cruelly. "You made sure of that."</p><p>"Severus…I am sorry, my boy. I am sorry for you both…But in war, we must all make sacrifices."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. A Visitor</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Draco comes to visit.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry examined the dainty silver chains on his wrists that were practically indestructible. He wondered why Voldemort didn't just give him something tougher looking, like cuffs that bit into his skin, but he supposed it wouldn't do to complain.</p><p>He sat at the dining room table with Severus on his right. <em>Severus. </em>He hadn't been granted permission, per se, but Severus had yet to tell him to stop.</p><p>"Not having magic sucks," Harry groused. "I miss it."</p><p>Severus didn't look up from the paper he was reading. It seemed the man never stopped doing research. "You didn't have a wand on you when you were captured." <em>When I captured you</em>.</p><p>"That's because I've gotten pretty decent at wandless magic," Harry said. "Not enough to probably kill, mind you, but enough to light fires and cast silencing charms…What are you reading?" Harry leaned closer to the man, peaking at the page. "Have you made any progress…?" he was tentative to ask.</p><p>Severus put down the paper with a heavy sigh. "I have the base, I think. I just can't figure out the next few steps. The lacewing flies and the dragon's heartstring are incompatible with the newt's tail after I add three drops of—"</p><p>"Forget I asked."</p><p>"Are you done with that translation yet?"</p><p>"Er…"</p><p>"<em>Harry</em>, it's important."</p><p>"I know, <em>Severus.</em>" Harry sat back down in his seat, as if putting distance between them would hide the scent of his deception. "I just have a few more pages to go. Why are you so sure the answer will be in this book, anyway?"</p><p>Severus took a sip of his coffee. No milk, no sugar. "It's written by Salazar himself. I have no other reason to believe it will help."</p><p><em>Liar, </em>said the Aegis<em>.</em> Harry didn't say anything to that and continued to pick at his breakfast. Today was scrambled eggs. Even though Severus wouldn't let him brew, he trusted Harry in the kitchen. Apparently, the Dark Lord thought that a house-elf to help them would be too much of a security risk as they could move in and out of the wards. A phenomenon he had learned the hard way when some prisoners at Malfoy Manor had escaped. Harry had seen it through a vision. Dobby had been killed on the spot.</p><p>But apparently, owls were not a security risk, and as long as they were keyed to the wards, it was possible for letters to be sent to them. Harry watched the progress of the small tawny owl swoop in through the window and land on their table, a small scroll tied to its leg.</p><p>They both looked at it for a moment. The owl hooted expectantly.</p><p>Harry waited while Severus read through the letter, watching as his eyebrows shot up. Harry tensed.</p><p>"It seems, Harry," said Severus, putting down the scroll, "That we are going to have a visitor."</p><p>"<em>What</em>?" Harry's stomach did a flip. He liked being in the house alone with Severus. No torture. Just keeping the Aegis happy, like feeding a pet. His limbs began to shake of their own accord. He almost didn't want to know, but he had to know…"When? Who?"</p><p>Severus' lip curled. "It seems that the Dark Lord will be taking weekly business trips on Friday and is entrusting Draco to my care, starting tomorrow."</p><p>"Shit." Harry couldn't breathe for a second, and then a hand settled over his, in a completely innocent gesture. Harry found himself calming before another thought occurred to him. He stared wide eyed at Severus. "But you're always gone Friday nights! You can't leave me alone with him!"</p><p>The hand holding his gave him a comforting squeeze, then withdrew. "I can and I must," Severus said. "It's important at least one of us knows what's going on in the wider world. To not attend Lucius' gatherings would be folly."</p><p>"But Draco—"</p><p>"—Shouldn't bother you. What you should be worried about is <em>why</em> he's coming here."</p><p>"You just said that Vol- that he's busy…but I take it from your look that that's a lie."</p><p>"Harry, the Dark Lord could have asked anyone to take Draco if he didn't trust him to his own devices. He's sending Draco here to spy."</p><p>"But then won't he notice that I…" Harry blushed, looking away. "Won't he notice that I have my own room? And wear clothes? And that I'm not, you know, being trained?"</p><p>"Well, as it happens, Harry," Severus said with a glint in his dark eyes, "He won't notice that you have your own room because you'll be staying in mine, and he won't see you wearing clothes, so how will he be able to report that? And as for being trained, you seem to be jumping at the chance to serve me, well enough. Make a show of preparing my meals and fixing my drinks. That will be enough."</p><p>Harry shivered. The Aegis was fairly vibrating with electricity, urging him to complete the bond and make it whole. But then he thought of Moody's hands sliding over his back and remembered the look on Voldemort's face as he forced his way into the slim, pale body beneath him. The anguish and the agony and the ecstasy.</p><p>"Where's your Gryffindor courage, Harry?" Severus challenged, seeing only that Harry had faced away.</p><p>"<em>My</em> courage?" Harry asked, aghast. "As you recall, it was my suggestion that we <em>keep up appearances</em>, but you said No! And now you wonder if I'm too cowardly to share your bed?"</p><p>Severus shook his head. "Actually, <em>I'll</em> be sleeping in a transfigured couch in the bedroom and <em>you'll</em> be taking the bed."</p><p>"Oh…" Harry wasn't sure how to feel about that. It seemed rather like splitting hairs to Harry who knew he was going to be walking around naked all day. "And when you leave? How am I supposed to act when you're not around? He's not…he's not <em>above </em>me, is he? I don't need to follow orders from him, right?"</p><p>"Indeed you do not," Severus hissed. "I believe you might even be considered equals."</p><p>How reassuring. "So I can shut myself in my-I mean-your room when you leave and that should be fine?"</p><p>"I doubt very much whether Draco will actually seek to engage you in any sort of conversation," Severus sighed. "Spy or not, I think he'll appreciate the brief respite from his new duties and sleep most of the time. I'll give him the third bedroom and lock your room so he can't get in."</p><p>"Thank you…So when should we expect him?"</p><p>"Tomorrow at three."</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Harry had never seen Severus' bedroom before. There hadn't been a reason before. The room was hardly better than Harry's own room, barely furnished, nothing <em>personal</em>. There was a large bed that dominated the room, a dresser, no doubt full of black clothes, and a rather large cushion at the foot of the bed.</p><p>"Is…is that where I was supposed to sleep?" Harry asked, eyeing the pillow with disdain.</p><p>"That, or my bed," Severus said, not sounding much happier. "Now, when I leave for Malfoy Manor tonight, you may come up here. Do try not to pry into my personal belongings, despite your recalcitrant nature."</p><p>"Of course not," Harry said, "I am sorry, you know…it was an accident. I didn't mean to look into your memories…" <em>I was just trying to be the savior, the way Dumbledore wanted me to be.</em> "I'm sorry. I realize I never really told you that."</p><p>Severus pinched the bridge of his nose and leaned against the wall. "I appreciate it, Harry, but it is rather behind us now." He cast a pointed glance at Harry's state of undress. "It would be hardly fair of me to extract apologies now all things considered."</p><p>Harry shrugged. "I suppose you're right."</p><p>The wards pulsed. Severus quickly turned to Harry, his posture tense. "He's here."</p><p>Apparently, the Dark Lord hadn't accompanied Draco to their abode, simply shoved the boy through the floo system so that he tumbled out, platinum blond hair full of soot, on their living room carpet. Severus eyed his godson with unreadable eyes. If Harry had been changed by what happened to him, who knew how Draco had transformed within the Dark Lord's influence. But Draco was not his concern, just another obstacle, another distraction to waste his time. It was as if the Dark Lord <em>wanted</em> him to fail.</p><p>"Draco," Severus greeted, standing before him.</p><p>Draco, on his hands and knees, coughed once from the floo travel before looking up and meeting his eyes. They were silver, same as always. "Sir." Those silver eyes shifted over to settle on Harry, who was standing awkwardly in the doorway. Draco gracefully stood up, inclining his head. "Potter."</p><p>"Malfoy."</p><p>Severus rolled his eyes. "Now that introductions are out of the way, won't you follow me to your room, Draco?"</p><p>"Of course, sir."</p><p>Harry sat on the couch, curled up to hide himself. Draco was surely inspecting his new room, probably thinking it was a glorified prison cell for all its pomp and circumstance. He wasn't wrong. It was eerie to see Draco now in the flesh, after seeing him on and off in his visions, <em>feeling</em> him even. Part of Harry felt like he ought to apologize for invading his privacy like that, but Draco was a spy. It wasn't like Harry could control what he saw, and he didn't really want to explain how his visions worked anyway…</p><p>After a while, Harry got up and started to make dinner. It wasn't like he could very well work on the translation now that Draco was in their house, and he wasn't sure if Voldemort was aware Snape had the book either. It was best just to take his time making dinner, like a good servant. Anything mundane to kill time and avoid idle chit chat…</p><p>He needn't have worried. Draco didn't say a word to him all day, even when Severus went back down to his lab to brew. Draco just watched as Harry prepared dinner. Cutting potatoes, onions, and carrots. Mincing garlic. Straining pasta. Harry could just imagine the report Draco would give back to Voldemort. <em>Snape has been teaching him how to cook, my lord.</em> Harry almost snorted out loud.</p><p>Dinner was a silent affair as well.</p><p>Harry was apprehensive as he set the table, wondering if Draco and he would need to eat on the floor or some other such nonsense. He couldn't talk to Severus as he normally would. He couldn't even casually grab his arm to ask him a question, instead, settling on the briefest of touches. Fleeting, the way he had started this whole charade, letting his fingers linger as he passed Severus his evening cup of tea. He was painfully aware of the silver eyes that watched the whole time.</p><p>"I am leaving now," Severus announced rather obviously, as he threw on his outer cloak. He would go to the edge of the wards and apparate to Malfoy Manor. He never wanted to tumble out of the floo with so little dignity as Draco had just done.</p><p>Harry watched after him and gave him a nod. It was done. He had made it. Tiredly, Harry cleared away the dishes, cleaning them methodically, before turning towards the stairwell. He blinked, startled, as a certain blond blocked his path.</p><p>"He's gone," Draco said, as if Harry needed a reminder. "Come, we need to talk."</p><p>Harry looked at the blond head on. He wasn't scared. Hadn't Severus said they were equals?</p><p>"There's nothing to talk about," Harry said, and made to brush past him. Draco wouldn't budge, his hand caught Harry around the waist, startling him. "Draco…"</p><p>"Come on, Potter, we don't have all the time in the world. I came here for a very specific reason and I intend to see it through."</p><p>"You came because <em>He</em> wanted you to come."</p><p>Draco shook his head. "No. The Dark Lord might have ordered me to be here, but I came to save my godfather. Now, come on."</p><p>Draco led the way to his bedroom, the one neither Harry nor Snape slept in at night. It was a replica of Harry's own room sans Harry's belongings, and was slightly smaller. Harry watched him warily as he settled down on the bed, gesturing for Harry to join him. Bed. Draco. Harry couldn't help the images that rose in his mind of the last time he saw Draco on a bed, him towering above him…No, not him. <em>Voldemort</em>.</p><p>"I don't bite," Draco stated, finally convincing Harry to take a seat. "I know you have no reason to trust me, but believe me when I say I am just looking out for my godfather…" He fixed Harry with a serious expression. "I know you two aren't fucking."</p><p>"That's-That's hardly your concern!" Harry snapped tightly, "We have a year. Why? What do you care? Tired of <em>his</em> service already?"</p><p>Draco didn't even blink at his outburst, simply examining his nails. "Actually, Potter, being in his <em>service</em> is mainly just for show to punish my father. He failed to break you, remember?"</p><p>It might be for show, but Voldemort certainly did enough without witnesses for Harry to know Draco was putting on a front.</p><p>"But you still…"</p><p>"Yes, I still do." Draco frowned, no use in denying it. "But it's like he doesn't even want me when he uses me…He's obsessed with you, Potter." Draco continued, "My father is naturally upset at the outcome of his failure, and has convinced the Dark Lord that you should be brought before him at least once before the year is up."</p><p>"I'm aware," Harry whispered.</p><p>"Then you should know that it <em>is</em> my concern that Snape hasn't trained you yet. The minute the Dark Lord sees you, he'll realize what my godfather refuses to do. He'll kill him, Potter! I can't-I can't let that happen!"</p><p>"I agree."</p><p>"You-you what?"</p><p>"I said, Malfoy, that I agree."</p><p>Draco eyed him strangely. "Merlin, perhaps I was wrong. Maybe my godfather <em>is</em> breaking you."</p><p>"Don't be ridiculous. It's probably just Stockholm," Harry deadpanned, echoing Severus' concern from before.</p><p>"There is more than one way to skin a kneazle, Potter…"</p><p>"Well, if that's all," Harry said, making to get up. Draco grabbed his wrist fast, over the cold silver chain that rested there.</p><p>"No, Potter, that is NOT all…I…" The hand moved to his waist, then down to his hip.</p><p>Harry shivered. "Malfoy…"</p><p>"Whatever my godfather is planning, it won't be fast enough to satisfy the Dark Lord. He wants you absolutely broken, Potter, do you hear me? A pet, his perfect complement in every way. I know I can't be that for him but…I know what he likes…" Draco reached for Harry's arm and tugged him down on the bed again. "I can help you…make it easier…I know you're a virgin, Potter, so we won't, you know…I know the Dark Lord would kill me if he knew I took that from him, and we both know Snape isn't likely to cave…"</p><p>Harry swallowed thickly. He knew his options. He knew what was at stake. He knew what Draco was offering. <em>I'm not a virgin</em>, Harry thought to himself absently. Apparently he hadn't been for a while. Draco's forehead touched Harry's. Emerald met silver.</p><p>"I just have one question," Harry asked quietly, as Draco's lips brushed over his.</p><p>"Hmm?"</p><p>"How did you know we weren't…you know…"</p><p>Draco chuckled. "You never learned occlumency, did you, Potter? Your mind is an open book."</p><p>Harry shut his eyes. The roaring of a waterfall filled his ears. What was his existence if not lies upon lies upon lies…?</p><p>"Alright, for Severus," Harry finally whispered.</p><p>"Good boy," Draco smirked and gave a pointed glance at the space between his legs. "I think we should start here, don't you?"</p><p>Harry slowly fell into position the way Moody had taught him, the muscle memory guiding his movements, as if he were under the imperius curse, no longer in charge of his own body. The Aegis protested in his chest, weakly, as if unsure if Harry was betraying Severus by doing this or actually helping him in a roundabout way.</p><p>"Now open wide, Potter. And mind the teeth!"</p><p>Harry pushed away the feelings of the Aegis as he took the member into his mouth. Just because Severus refused to acknowledge their situation didn't mean Harry would. Harry had to be prepared to save him, to save them both. Didn't war require sacrifices?</p><p>"<em>Merlin, Potter!</em>" Draco groaned, reaching down to fist Harry's hair. "You're a natural…"</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>When Severus came home that night, he checked that both boys were asleep in their respective rooms, before transfiguring the cushion at the foot of his bed into a couch. The night had been long, with Lucius too preoccupied with bragging about his promotion at the Ministry to bother Severus at all. Even Narcissa had taken the night off from her duties to celebrate her husband's achievement. It wouldn't be long until Lucius became Minister of Magic, a puppet to do the Dark Lord's bidding.</p><p>Severus eased himself into his makeshift bed and closed his eyes. He could make out Harry's form sleeping for once, silent, on the bed. Today had gone better than expected…Draco and Harry hadn't tried to kill each other once, and seeing as they were both alive now, he could only assume the night had been peaceful, and relatively uneventful, while he had been away…</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Tom Riddle</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Harry talks to Tom.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was a dream unlike any other. Harry felt like himself…alive, awake even. But he wasn't alone.</p><p>"Hello Harry."</p><p>The world shifted and Harry found himself in a room with cold stone floors, dark mahogany walls, and a long lacquered table, the kind Harry had often seen in Death Eater meetings. Tom Riddle, young, handsome, human looking, sat at the table, his hands folded calmly before him.</p><p>"Sit, Harry. You have nothing to fear from me. We are allies."</p><p>Harry quickly scanned the dream room for a way out, but finding none, cautiously took a seat across from the man. <em>Tom Riddle always was so handsome</em>.</p><p>"Voldemort," Harry said, his mouth dry. "Why have you summoned me here?"</p><p>"Here? We are in your mind, Harry, and I haven't become Voldemort, yet. I am still Tom Riddle. Intelligent, strong, wise. Model student. Head boy, in fact. Graduated with top honors, intent to change the world. I have not yet lost my complete sanity."</p><p>He was right. This Tom was older than the one in the Chamber, but not nearly as old as the Voldemort now. This was the horcrux in his scar.</p><p>"Ah, I see you understand." Tom gave him a smile that was devoid of any mockery. "Such as intelligent boy. Even Severus doesn't see you as I see you, does he, Harry?"</p><p>Harry pressed his lips together. If Tom thought he was just going to spill his secrets, then he wasn't as intelligent as he thought.</p><p>"Harry, there's no need to keep secrets between friends, hmm? I am a part of you and you are a part of me. We complete each other. I would never wish you harm. I have seen too much and lived through too much to wish you harm. For instance, Moody is very lucky he is already dead right now."</p><p>Harry startled. "You know…" Then the game was well and truly up.</p><p>"Of course I know. I lived through it with you, helped you block the memories even, before <em>Dumbledore</em> thought to invoke the Aegis to keep those memories at bay…"</p><p>"So if you know, Voldemort knows <em>everything</em>," Harry said aloud. That Severus was a traitor. That Harry could not break. That the Aegis bound him to…</p><p>"NO!" Tom shouted, slamming his hand against the table. Magic flared around them, making Harry shrink back, knowing he could not use magic to defend himself here. Not with the things around his wrists. "No," he repeated, much calmer.</p><p>Harry tilted his head to the side. "Why…?"</p><p>"We may have the same source, but he is not I. It is rather like having another predator in the room," Tom confessed. "I've become more sentient than he would like."</p><p>"You're worried Voldemort will destroy you?" Harry asked, shaking his head. "That doesn't make sense. He's been absorbing the other horcruxes as far as I can tell…Except, of course, for you. I don't even think he <em>wants</em> to absorb you."</p><p>Tom gave him another smile. It made Harry's heart flutter despite himself. "That is where you're wrong. Voldemort is very much interested in absorbing me, but he won't unless he's sure it won't kill you. Because, you see, Draco was right. He's very much obsessed with you." Tom reached across the table and lightly played with the silver chain around his wrist.</p><p>"And you?" Harry asked breathlessly.</p><p>"What do you think, Harry? It is one of the reasons he is so intent on absorbing me. He knows what he is, what I am. He knows I won't stop until you're mine…He knows he is obsessed, but he can't understand it. His capacity to love, Harry, was taken from him with his creation of me." Tom brushed his lips against the back of Harry's hand. "Why else do you think he has taken on Draco? It is to practice how to be gentle. He thinks he wants you broken, but he doesn't understand that what makes you our perfect match is your <em>spirit</em>. He's taken on Draco, but he doesn't fully understand <em>why</em>."</p><p>"But Severus…?" Harry asked.</p><p>"Hmm? What about dear Severus?"</p><p>"He can't break me. He doesn't even want to. You know this. He's going to get me out of here," Harry said with conviction.</p><p>"Oh yes," Tom said. "The Severus who claimed you had occlumency shields? Who brought the prophecy that killed your parents to Voldemort's attention? Who lured you here with his patronus? Who is, at this moment, brewing the potion to allow Voldemort to absorb me into his soul? <em>That</em> Severus?"</p><p>"He said it was to remove the Dark Mark," Harry said in a very small voice, convinced by now that Tom already knew this, and was therefore not at risk of giving anything away.</p><p>"Of course he did. And he told you he went by himself to the Chamber of Secrets too to retrieve Salazar's book, even though you know that is a lie. He used the imperius curse on you the first night you were here and made you take him to the chamber. <em>Your</em> mind was under the influence. Mine was not."</p><p>Tom was a liar. Hadn't he always been a liar? He was charming and manipulative and…Harry knew that he was right. "That doesn't matter," Harry protested. "So what if he wants to remove you? That's all the better then. I don't want you in me! And as for the book, well, that just shows how much he cares. <em>Voldemort</em> gave us a deadline, you know! Severus was only doing what he had to…"</p><p>Tom smirked at Harry then, his cold fingers running along Harry's arm, sliding the cold bracelet up to reveal Harry's wrist. Tom rubbed the unblemished skin gently, watching Harry's face all the while.</p><p>"It wouldn't be because of the Aegis that you feel so suddenly protective of Severus now, is it?" Tom laughed as Harry began to look uncertain. "Don't worry, Harry, the Aegis will transfer easily enough. You know he can't break you, won't even <em>think</em> about touching you, even to save his own hide. Soon, you'll feel all sorts of warm and fuzzy feelings for me too." He pressed a kiss to the inside of Harry's wrist, where the Aegis mark had not yet come in, but would surely become more visible with each passing day. Noticeable, if one moved the chain and knew what to look for… "Because you're not planning on telling dear Severus about the Aegis, are you?" Tom stated, more than asked.</p><p>Knowing he was defeated, Harry lowered his eyes. He couldn't lie to himself. "No. Severus cannot know."</p><p>Tom knew him too well. Harry could attempt to buy them time, could strive to keep them both alive, could even hope Severus was still on his side and could free him from Tom and Voldemort and the Aegis…but those plans would all be flung out the window the second Severus learned of the bond between them. Who knew how he'd react? What he might decide to do in light of this information? What the bond might force him to do once he was aware? Severus might attempt to wield its protective properties as a weapon, or decide to bind Harry to him for life…and he wasn't even entirely sure of the man's motivations. Especially not now with all of Tom's revelations swirling in his head. <em>Severus had cast the imperius on him…</em></p><p>"Will you be telling Voldemort about the Aegis?" Harry had to ask, knowing he could not stop Tom from doing as he wished, but needing to know the answer. His emerald eyes bored into Tom's.</p><p>Tom looked uncertain for a moment as if weighing the odds of whether or not doing so could possibly work in his favor. "No, I won't…" Tom finally said, holding fast to Harry's hand. "I think this should be our little secret…"</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Confrontation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus sees something.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>All spelling and grammatical errors are my own. Forgive me. Thank you for the comments.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry set the coffee mug in front of Severus. The man was the same as always, Harry supposed. It was only Harry who had changed. It had been a couple months after Draco had first come to visit, a few weeks after Tom had spoken to Harry, and thankfully, that was the only time Tom had spoken to Harry. It was summer now and the Aegis mark on his wrist had started to come in more visibly, like a scar, paler than his normal skin color, almost outlined in silver. It was small and blended well with the silver chain. To his relief, Severus had not noticed it.</p><p>"I finished the translation," Harry lied, throwing down the last few translated chapters onto the kitchen table. The only chapter missing was the one on the Aegis.</p><p>"Ah, thank you, Harry." Severus barely glanced at him as he pulled the papers towards himself. He was always so busy these days, brewing and researching nonstop. Only pausing on Fridays to seek out more news at Malfoy Manor, which was for the best, as Harry and Draco needed the time alone.</p><p>Harry considered the man before him. His prominent nose, regal in fact, intense black eyes, a voice as smooth as velvet, with words that could cut straight to the soul. Aegis or not, Harry was certain he had already liked the potions master in some capacity before. Hadn't he had that crush on the Half-Blood Prince back in sixth year? And that was when the Aegis was still keyed to Dumbledore…</p><p>Had Severus really cast the imperius curse on him? Yes, Harry could believe it. But had it just been that once or were there times he could not remember? Dumbledore had wielded his powers to keep traumatic memories from Harry's own mind. Was Severus perhaps unknowingly doing the same? Harry didn't think the man knew of the Aegis…perhaps he was overthinking it. A simple obliviate would have worked just as well.</p><p>"You're staring, Harry," Severus intoned. "It's become a bad habit."</p><p>"Oh, I—" Harry flushed. "Sorry."</p><p>"What were you thinking about?" Severus asked, lifting his eyes for the first time, and fixing Harry with a curious expression. His eyes were so dark, so deep. Intense.<em> Direct eye contact.</em></p><p>Harry abruptly stood up, his chair scraping the floor. "Why are you asking me when you can just pull it directly from my mind, Severus?"</p><p>Whatever Severus had been expecting, it wasn't that, but he didn't seem guilty. Didn't flush. Didn't offer any excuses. His eyes glinted ethereally and Harry almost regretted he had spoken. Well, it was too late to back out now.</p><p>"I don't have any occlumency shields, do I?" Harry asked, his chin jutting up. He was sick of the way Tom had gotten to him, but if there was a grain of truth from the mouth of the snake, he had to know. "Was there ever really a plan, or was that a lie too?"</p><p>"You think the Dark Lord would have entrusted you to me if he didn't have complete and utter faith in my loyalty, Harry?"</p><p>"He did it to test you," Harry reasoned. "He gave you an ultimatum."</p><p>"Look at the facts—no, not what you thought you heard—look at the facts. You are in my care. He would never have given you to me if he thought for one second I'd let you escape."</p><p>Despite Severus' menacing tone, the Aegis did not seem concerned. Harry hadn't actually <em>displeased</em> Severus by his question.</p><p>"I don't believe you," Harry said calmly.</p><p>Severus stared at him for a second more before releasing a laugh. "That, Harry, is the wisest thing you've ever said."</p><p>Harry glared. "No, I mean it Severus. I don't know what you hope to achieve by confusing me, but I can't be led around blindfolded anymore. Now, explain it to me. Do I have occlumency shields or not?"</p><p>"At times…"</p><p>"At times?" Harry asked.</p><p>"It seems that there are times where I can graze your surface thoughts, but nothing like before. There are other times, where I can't get a single thing."</p><p>The Aegis told Harry he was telling the truth.</p><p>"Like what?" Harry asked. "What thoughts have you taken from me?"</p><p>His wording seemed to catch Severus off-guard. His eyes narrowed. "How did you find out about your occlumency shields anyway, Harry?" he asked silkily.</p><p>"Draco," Harry said simply, already prepared. "My first night here. He knew we hadn't been, hadn't been, you know…" His cheeks tinged pink.</p><p>Severus thought that over for a second. So it seemed the boy could hold his tongue, but he wasn't supposed to be keeping secrets <em>from him</em>. Not if they were to work together to get out of there. "I hadn't realized you had become close to Draco," Severus said. "You two hardly speak two words when I'm here."</p><p>"I hardly think invading my mind counts as close," Harry shot back. "Besides, he wasn't able to get anything important, like your secret plan to help us escape."</p><p>"Obviously not, if we're both still alive!" Severus sighed. "However it is you are able to occlude has been sufficient. I didn't think it was worth bringing up and explaining the nuances between what you're able to do and what it's supposed to be like. Perhaps I was wrong…" he glanced at Harry critically.</p><p>He wondered for a moment if he should simply dose the boy with veritaserum again, but the last time he had done so, Harry had simply vomited and not answered any of his questions. Severus had promptly obliviated him afterwards. But even obliviating him had been risky. The boy's mind was a maze, the landscape entirely different from what it had been during their occlumency lessons in fifth year. Then, it had seemed flat, full of childish thoughts, hopes and dreams. Now, it was something Severus could not understand, as if there was some sort of protection in place.</p><p>In a way…it almost reminded Severus of his own mental defenses just more twisted, but that was absurd. He wondered if it was Albus' doing or perhaps the horcrux growing stronger…He should like to look inside again, perhaps, with the boy's permission he would be able to get further.</p><p>"It might be prudent, Harry, if we were to resume occlumency lessons again."</p><p>Harry stilled. "Why? You said it yourself. Whatever I have is enough to keep Vol- Him out and apparently, good enough to keep you out too."</p><p>True. Severus forced his face into an expression of concern. He would have to come up with another reason. "I think…that it could help curb your nightmares." Also true. "You may be able to block me from your mind while you sleep, but you still speak aloud. Occlumency could ameliorate that." Severus didn't mind one bit that he had to cradle Harry to his chest in the dead of night. He relished it even, but he had no other explanations that would work.</p><p>Harry bit his lip. He knew he talked in his sleep. Ron had told him so…but surely he hadn't let anything slip that was too important, for Severus would have confronted him about it, and so far, he hadn't. Which meant Severus didn't have enough clues to put everything together yet. But if Harry slipped up… then again, occlumency lessons would provide Severus with ample opportunity to try and break into his mind and learn everything. Could he really risk that?</p><p>Severus waited patiently for the answer. Harry wasn't sure if refusing was a good idea. It would imply he had something to hide…And the Aegis had protected his mind thus far, hadn't it?</p><p>"Alright…" Harry finally said, praying that the Aegis wouldn't betray him now.</p><p>"Good."</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>They didn't actually practice occlumency that day. Or in the month that followed. Neither of them brought it up again. Not even when Severus held Harry through his nightmares. Not even when Harry awoke to find himself still wrapped in Severus' arms. If Severus wanted the nightmares to stop, he might have tried a little harder to appear like comforting him wasn't the greatest bliss on earth. As it was, Harry couldn't help but think Severus looked much more content than he had in a long time as he gently nudged the potions master awake.</p><p>"I should just stay in your room," Harry joked with a yawn, as they rolled out of bed. "It would save us some time…You know, I never do have nightmares in your bed."</p><p>Severus just grunted. "You're probably just too stressed and tired from pretending with Draco all day. Deception is like a muscle. Without practice, it can certainly be draining."</p><p>"Ah, yes…that's probably it." Harry frowned down at his hands, trying inconspicuously to see the faint outline of the Aegis mark. It made him oddly happy when he saw it, like he belonged somewhere finally, a place just for him. "It probably has nothing to do with the fact I just feel safer with you."</p><p>Severus stiffened visibly. "Pardon?"</p><p>Had he said that bit out loud? "Er, nothing," Harry said, absently rubbing his wrist. "It doesn't mean anything."</p><p>"Hmmm."</p><p>Did Severus seem disappointed at that? Harry couldn't understand him these days. At first, it seemed that Severus would never stop working on his potion, but now, it seemed he was often out of the house. Harry never asked where he went though. It was likely Severus would just say he was <em>going</em> <em>out</em>. Sometimes, Harry knew it was a Death Eater meeting because he'd get visions of it, but Severus had been called to fewer and fewer meetings lately. He wondered if that meant something about Severus in particular, or if the Dark Lord was just too busy trying to build a new nation to keep his minions in line.</p><p>"What are you doing?" Severus asked sharply, his voice suddenly by Harry's ear.</p><p>Harry started. "What-?"</p><p>"You keep touching your damnable hand, now let me see it!"</p><p>Automatically, Harry hid his hands behind him. He hadn't realized he had been drawing so much attention to it. He would have to be more careful in the future.</p><p>"Let me see!" Severus demanded.</p><p>"It's nothing!" Harry said, thinking fast. "It happened a long time ago."</p><p>A frown marred the man's features as Harry slowly and carefully revealed the back of his hand, making sure to keep his palm towards the floor. The words were clear as day.</p><p>
  <em>I must not tell lies.</em>
</p><p>"Who did this to you?" Severus hissed, his voice no louder than a whisper. It put Harry on edge, but he knew the danger promised in his words was not for him.</p><p>Harry pretended to hesitate before relenting with a heavy sigh. "Umbridge."</p><p>"While you were serving all those detentions, I suppose?" Harry nodded. "Is it bothering you now? It doesn't appear to be infected, but one never knows." He looked into Harry's eyes then, and Harry could see protectiveness shining in his depths. "Blood quills are dark artefacts, Harry, and I doubt the toad sterilized it properly. It wouldn't surprise me if this continued to flare up. Has it been bothering you all these weeks?"</p><p>Harry marveled at the feeling of Severus' hand holding his, examining it gently. He had never had someone care for him like this before. Not even Poppy had gazed upon him like he were something precious and…loved. Harry almost felt bad about the deception.</p><p>"No, it just tingles sometimes," Harry said, like it was a confession. "I think it's just a trauma memory."</p><p>Severus nodded at that and gently released his hand. "I might have some salve that will get rid of that."</p><p>"You do?" Harry asked, and for once, he was genuinely surprised. He let it show on his face.</p><p>"I am a potions master," Severus said with mock bravado. "What good would I be if I didn't have healing potions on me in my line of work?"</p><p>Harry laughed and before Severus could protest, wrapped his arms around him in a tight hug, the opportunity too good to waste to settle the Aegis. "Thank you! That would be brilliant!"</p><p>Yes, it would be brilliant, Severus thought to himself as he basked in the warmth of Harry's attention. He felt appreciated, in a way that neither Albus nor the Dark Lord had ever made him feel. Appreciated, respected…<em>desired</em>…It was this last thought that gave Severus pause. He would have liked to tell himself that he was only helping Harry to see him smile again. For the boy's own health and well-being. But there was a side that was increasingly pushing to the surface. When he had seen the old toad's marks upon Harry's skin, he had been filled with unbelievable rage. Someone had dared to carve into Harry? <em>His Harry? </em>Offering a healing salve was entirely self-serving. He needed to erase all traces of her from his skin. It didn't bother him that Harry was hurt, that the scar continued to bring him phantom pains. It bothered him that he hadn't put it there…</p><p>"I'm going out today," Severus heard himself saying. "I will be able to have your salve by dinner." He had to get away, clear his mind. With obvious effort, he extracted himself from Harry's arms. He wasn't a monster. He wasn't. "And, if you think it will help, you may stay in my rooms any time you wish." He had to leave before he said something else. Something stupid. Something that sounded suspiciously like <em>I feel affection for you</em>.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. The Cost of Silence</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Lucius tries to teach Harry about currency.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry heard the floo activate and frowned to himself. That had been quick. Hadn't Severus intended to be out all day? Harry was in the dining room, sorting the new shipment of ingredients to arrive by owl mail. He couldn't imagine any of these ingredients came cheaply and wondered if Severus had first joined the Dark Lord because the potion's budget had been astronomical. Surely it was better than what Severus had at Hogwarts.</p><p>"Well, well, well…What do we have here? A slave wearing clothes and out and about while its keeper is gone? And riffling through the mail no less…"</p><p>"Lucius," Harry said calmly, though his heart began to race, faster and faster, until he was sure it was going to burst. They had tried so hard to keep up appearances with Draco, and now, it was all for naught if Lucius went straight to the Dark Lord now with this memory. He turned slowly, putting down the bouquet of dried lavender beside the armadillo bile. "I'm afraid Severus is out at the moment."</p><p>Lucius didn't seem one bit surprised. "Oh, but I didn't come to see him."</p><p>Of course not. "What do you want?" Harry asked steadily. He took a step away from the table and half-turned so that his upper body was facing the unwelcome guest.</p><p>Lucius shook his head, smirk in place. "Tsk, tsk. Wrong question, Harry. The question has always been what do <em>you</em> want and what are you willing to do to get it? For instance," Lucius stepped further into the room, shrugging off his outer traveling cloak and throwing it over one of the dining room chairs as if he owned the place. "You might desire that I hold my tongue before the Dark Lord when I see him next…but then again, you might not."</p><p>Harry could sense that Lucius, despite his words, didn't actually want to follow through with his threat. He had come here for something else, <em>someone else</em>, and clearly intended to get it. "And the price?" Harry asked lightly.</p><p>Lucius quirked an elegant eyebrow and fixed Harry with an expression that was altogether too falsely compassionate. "But Harry, it isn't <em>my</em> price. It's what <em>you're</em> willing to pay." He shook his head, as if he couldn't quite believe Harry didn't understand yet. "I recall having mistakenly believed I knew what it was you would pay before. What was it again? Ah, the lives of two of your closest friends. A miscalculation I do not intend to repeat. So tell me, Harry, just what <em>is</em> your currency?"</p><p>Harry bit his lip as the older wizard began to take off his gloves, slowly, savoring Harry's moment of indecision, of panic. This was bad. Hadn't the wards alerted Severus to an unexpected guest? Would he be able to stall for time? Or was he to take care of this himself? What if Lucius went to the Dark Lord?</p><p>"I can't bow down to you," Harry began. The Aegis would not allow him…but there was some flexibility where the Aegis was concerned. If Severus willed it, or if Harry could convince the bond that this was truly in Severus' best interest, the Aegis might let him walk the line between submitting and temporarily agreeing. Temporarily being the operative word that prevented him from swearing loyalty to Voldemort.</p><p>"That's not remotely interesting to me," Lucius drawled. "That is for my lord, after all."</p><p>"So what <em>do</em> you want then?" Harry asked, wary of giving Lucius too much by setting the initial conditions of their negotiations too high.</p><p>"Giving up already? But you haven't even tried. Perhaps I should just go and alert—" His hand hovered over the Dark Mark, ghosting over the ink, and Harry found himself panicking despite his better judgement.</p><p>"I <em>want</em> to know what <em>you</em> want," Harry insisted, his voice high with panic. "I <em>want</em> to know what will buy your silence, Lucius. Please, I <em>want </em>you to just tell me."</p><p>"Well, if that's what you truly desire," Lucius sighed, but removed his hand from above the mark much to Harry's relief. "What I want is to get even with Severus. Not kill him, Merlin no, just hurt him just a bit." His silver eyes locked onto Harry's. "You see, Harry, it was Severus who told me exactly how you could be broken, and I trusted him, fool I. And I have paid dearly for it with my son."</p><p>"I know," Harry said. "He told me."</p><p>Lucius didn't seem all that surprised about that either. "I have a theory, Harry. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe that Severus would be quite displeased if I were to use you. I asked him about it once or twice, and he seemed quite adamant that you were his and his alone. Quite the hypocrite, I should add, seeing as he's taken with my wife…"</p><p><em>Narcissa? </em>That was certainly news to Harry and delivered in such a callous way. Was that why Severus was gone so often these days? Was that where Severus was <em>now</em>? Shagging the wife while Harry had to fend off the husband alone? He shouldn't have felt so hurt, but he did.</p><p>"You're mistaken, Lucius, if you think that would hurt him," Harry said with a confidence he didn't feel. "I'm nothing to him. He cast the imperius curse on me. He's obliviated me before. He's lied, many times. If anything, he'll appreciate your interference. It would make it easier to confuse me and have me running between his legs for protection. He'd thank you afterwards."</p><p>But if Harry thought that would put Lucius off, he was mistaken. "And yet, here you are, wearing clothes, with free rein to roam the house in his absence, instead of being chained in the cellar. I think, Harry, that maybe you are already confused."</p><p>"Perhaps you're right," Harry said tonelessly, trying and failing to come up with more protests to stall for time. <em>Severus is with Narcissa…Severus isn't coming…</em>Harry met Lucius' silver, gleaming eyes anew, resigned that he would need to pay for Lucius' silence by himself.</p><p>Lucius picked up on the change immediately and radiated with pleasure. "Now that we're on the same page," Lucius said with a feral grin as he advanced on the boy. "Won't you show me what dear Severus has been keeping to himself all these months? Nothing uncouth. I'm not greedy, after all, and I have no need to beg. Just one kiss…"</p><p>Lucius was a liar.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>"It's been a pleasure, Harry," Lucius said as he pulled on his outer cloak once more. Harry had turned around and was hastily throwing on his clothes. "A pity I can't stay longer…"</p><p>He made it two steps towards the floo when Harry's voice called out to him, unwavering but weary. "Was that enough?" <em>Was I enough?</em></p><p>Lucius turned around to face him, his eyes alight with malice. "It was more than enough, my dear Harry. It would have been enough after the first kiss, if you had just asked, but this wasn't about what <em>I</em> wanted. It was what <em>you</em> wanted, and you <em>certainly</em> wished to buy my silence."</p><p>Harry sank into himself then. The taste of Lucius bitter on his tongue. They had done everything except for the deed itself, perhaps because Lucius was still scared of the Dark Lord changing his mind once again about who Harry's virginity belonged to, as if that was still for the taking. It didn't stop Lucius from getting creative though, but mainly things that would leave visible marks. It seemed that Lucius had been truthful enough in his motivations and clearly wanted Harry to look worse for wear than he actually was— the better to hurt Severus without any real risk of retribution. They were still <em>friends</em>, after all.</p><p>Harry numbly forced himself to take a shower, scrubbing himself thoroughly. At times, he caught himself staring at the wall. He never thought of himself as an innocent person, but as he watched the slightly pink water flow down the drain, he wondered when he had truly stopped being an innocent. Was it the moment Moody held him down, the moment he agreed to Draco's plan behind Severus' back, the moment when he allowed Lucius to use him just to hurt another?</p><p>It was like falling down a spiral staircase with no end in sight, but knowing the bottom would hurt when it came. Tom would understand. Tom had been through it all, had been with him through it all. Tom would at least appreciate the lengths Harry would go to, had gone to, understand why Harry had bent over the dining room table that afternoon and counted out the blows.</p><p><em>Would Severus?</em> Harry wondered this as he passed briefly by the man when he came home, touching his arm gently to settle the Aegis. Harry scrunched his nose up in surprise when the scent of alcohol hit his senses. Where had Severus been? Harry couldn't help but wonder if what Lucius said was true…</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>His feelings came to a head at dinner that night. He could no longer contain himself. Who was Severus to go traipsing around with the likes of Narcissa Malfoy when he was right here? The Aegis was pissed and so was Harry.</p><p>"Are you dating Narcissa?" Harry asked suddenly at dinner, slamming down his fork as Severus was just about to dig into his ravioli.</p><p>Severus shot him a startled look then, and did Harry imagine it, or had Severus looked nervous for a split second? "I don't date women, Harry. I thought that was fairly obvious."</p><p>"Are you seeing Narcissa, then?" Harry asked again, unperturbed.</p><p>"She is a Death Eater, Harry. Unmarked, but a Death Eater none-the less. Of course I see her." Severus' eyes sharpened as he studied the boy, a shade coming over his face. "Why? What's brought this on, Harry?"</p><p>Harry bit his lip. He wanted to know if Narcissa had touched him, but did he dare push the issue? Did he really want Severus to know what happened today, what Harry had done for the both of them? Did he maybe want Severus to fly into a rage, just for him, and promise unbreakable vows to never leave him alone again?</p><p>"Harry?" Severus prompted again, his voice softer. That's when he noticed the faint purpling bruises along Harry's neck. He hadn't been paying much attention when he had arrived back at the house, his head full of plans and dates and odd little pieces of unsolicited advice Albus had decided to share…Things like, <em>don't be afraid to get close to Harry, but not too close! </em>"Where are those bites from?" Already fearing the answer.</p><p>"Didn't you feel the wards when the floo activated?" Harry countered bitterly. "Aren't they keyed to you?"</p><p>It took Severus a second to work out what Harry was implying. He stood up suddenly, his hands slammed on the table. "I'll be more specific. WHO MARKED YOU?" Severus roared, nearly foaming at the mouth. He wasn't sure what triggered it, unbridled jealousy perhaps, the need to protect, to claim…</p><p>"WERE YOU WITH NARCISSA ALL DAY? Is that why you didn't come when you knew, when you knew I was no longer alone?"</p><p>"I—" Severus frowned as he tried to recall if the wards had alerted him to an intruder that day. He opened his mouth to protest, when it hit him. He had been in a heated argument with Narcissa over when to give the Order the go ahead on their rescue attempt. Narcissa wanted Draco out now and naturally, that spelled suicide for everyone involved. The wards had been prickling at the back of his mind, then. He had ignored it, not expecting anyone that day, and wrote it off as the onset of a headache which only alcohol could cure. Besides, only those with special permission could enter it anyway, which meant…the Dark Lord had known Lucius would come. "Harry, Narcissa and I have a working relationship. She is the headmistress of Hogwarts and access to Dumbledore's portrait is invaluable." And somehow completely useless. "Lucius, for obvious reasons, cannot know the nature of our meetings, but I assure you, they are strictly professional." His lip curled. Was professional having a shouting match that culminated in several portraits screaming at them to stop at once, lest they shatter every valuable instrument still left in the office?</p><p>Harry didn't seem too happy that Snape was indeed seeing Narcissa, and that he was seeing Dumbledore on top of it, and kept them both from him, but he nodded stiffly.</p><p>Good. Now Severus could get the answers to his own questions.</p><p>"What did he do to you, Harry?" Severus asked, more gently this time.</p><p>"Nothing I didn't want," Harry replied vacantly, to which Severus deeply frowned. It was only the desire to figure out what happened in his absence that kept his mouth shut. "It was a game to him. He said I had to buy his silence for clearly not being treated like a slave and he wouldn't tell me what he wanted. I gave him the chance to get even with you, he said, for Narcissa. The marks are mainly for show. I wasn't hurt, not really…" <em>He only choked me for a few seconds and beat me, but really, it could have been worse.</em></p><p>"Did he…did he—?"</p><p>"No," Harry shook his head. <em>No thanks to you, </em>Harry wanted to add. If Lucius hadn't known Snape would be back by dinner, his resolve might have wavered and Harry might very well have had to answer yes to that question. "He's scared the Dark Lord will change his mind and want my first time for himself." His lips twisted in wry amusement, but Severus was already looking away, unseeing.</p><p>"I am sorry, more sorry than you will ever know, that I was not here earlier today to protect you." Because what else was it but a monumental showing of his failure. What good was his plan to save them both if the boy was at the mercy of any murderous Death Eater who tumbled from the fireplace? "But I wish you to know that I may not have been able to stop it, even if I had."</p><p>Harry's voice broke. "Of course you could have. You claimed me. He's not supposed to touch me."</p><p>Severus shook his head and reached for Harry's hand across the table, trying to convey his sincerity. "The only people with the ability to use the floo in this house are sanctioned by the Dark Lord himself. No one goes in and out of here without the Dark Lord's knowledge, at least by floo. Lucius might have wanted to convince you that he was acting alone, but it was with the Dark Lord's blessing that he came here today. The fact that I was not informed…" Severus frowned, "simply means the Dark Lord is letting us know he has not forgotten about us."</p><p>Harry's hands began to shake. So there had been more at stake today than he had thought, and he just hoped that he had passed whatever test it was with flying colors. Would Draco be proud of him? Would he even tell Draco?</p><p>Severus pulled Harry into his arms, letting the boy lean against his chest. "It's a good thing I found the healing salve," he said. His chest rumbled. Harry could hear the beating of his heart beneath his ear. "It should take all the marks away…All the physical ones at least."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Summoned</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus is summoned.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Now that Harry knew about Narcissa, Severus didn't feel the need to hide his association with her anymore in front of Harry. Every so often, Harry would catch her popping in and out at the edge of the wards, always with a rather serious expression on her face. Perhaps being headmistress was more tiring than she anticipated.</p><p>They didn't talk much. Harry, for obvious reasons, didn't entirely trust her. She might have gained Severus' trust, but how did they know she wasn't just reporting everything back to Voldemort who was just watching and waiting? And, more to the point, Harry was jealous.</p><p>Narcissa Malfoy was everything Harry was not. Beautiful, tall, blonde, a woman of impeccable breeding and taste. Even her voice was cultured and controlled. Harry couldn't help but feel inadequate in comparison. Severus had said he didn't date women…but that didn't mean he didn't like them or that he would like men or that he would even like Harry. Even if Harry caught Severus' possessive streak flaring up once in a while, he wasn't even sure if that was from him or the Aegis. Even moments of tenderness, where Severus would allow Harry to crawl into bed with him after a particularly bad nightmare needn't be romantic in nature.</p><p>"Tea?" Harry asked Severus, poking his head into the office space where the two were holding court. It was clear Harry was not invited to these meetings because of the strong silencing charms over the room.</p><p>"Ah, tea would be nice," Severus had replied. "Two cups."</p><p>"Two…right." Harry flushed under Narcissa's perceptive gaze. He wasn't a bloody house-elf. It was just so routine to make Severus tea, that was all.</p><p>"He's taken quite a liking to you," Narcissa remarked when Harry was gone from the room.</p><p>"He rarely sees anyone else but me," Severus snapped.</p><p>"Save for Draco, and last I heard, Harry wasn't serving him tea."</p><p>A sneaking suspicion grasped Severus' heart then. "Have you been talking to the headmaster?"</p><p>"Severus," Narcissa laughed. "One doesn't need a barmy old portrait to tell me what I see before my own eyes. You may have promised the headmaster to keep his chastity intact, but Dumbledore is dead. He can't haunt you."</p><p>"Can't he?"</p><p>She ignored him. "He would hardly be unwilling," Narcissa continued. "You know he glares at me when he thinks you aren't watching. He positively radiates envy."</p><p>"Does he?" Severus tried to sound detached. He was worried a little note of hope had snuck in there at the end.</p><p>Harry chose that moment to pop back in, handing Severus his tea carefully so that their fingers touched, and plunking Narcissa's down in front of her. Narcissa's eyes were alight with laughter. Harry fled, ashamed at his own reaction. Narcissa could see right through him.</p><p>"Perhaps," Severus said, staring at the spot Harry had just left.</p><p>Narcissa took a delicate sip of her tea. "I mean, after all, he isn't a complete innocent. Why Lucius said—"</p><p>The rage that suddenly filled Severus' eyes gave her pause. She swallowed.</p><p>"I think it would be best if you left," Severus said coldly, standing up. "I find myself rather busy at the moment and Draco isn't going anywhere anytime soon. You can plan his extraction for another day."</p><p>Narcissa put down her tea. "I misspoke. I only meant to inform you that Lucius had reported the boy having nightmares while in his care. That boy has lived through too much to be completely fragile. I was encouraging you to take a chance. He isn't made of glass, Severus." She stood stiffly. "I haven't talked to Lucius very much since then. I was…unaware…"</p><p>Severus sighed and sat back down. They needed each other and she knew it. "I am sorry I snapped at you, Narcissa." Apologies were not his forte. "I find myself rather…protective these days."</p><p>Narcissa cautiously settled back down into her seat as well.</p><p>"It is not a sin to love, Severus."</p><p>And in his agitated state, Severus almost believed her. He opened his mouth, maybe to protest half-heartedly, but instead what came out was a pained groan. His hand slapped over the dark mark.</p><p>Narcissa switched to business mode in a second. "I'll clean up around here and return to the castle. I'll let Mr. Potter know you're gone." She gathered the evidence of their deception and proceeded to cast the required layers of spells to keep them concealed.</p><p>Severus nodded once, curtly, and then he was gone.</p><p>Narcissa was just exited the room when she ran into Harry who was coming down the stairs. He eyed her warily as she slowed to approach him.</p><p>"Severus has been summoned." She watched as the color drained from Potter's face. Harry gave her a single nod and his esteem rose in her eyes. "Take care of him, Mr. Potter…"</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Voldemort's face was classically handsome, Draco had decided. Very symmetrical. After absorbing the horcrux in the locket, even more so. It was just his red eyes that were uncanny, and the dark magic that swirled around him like a smog.</p><p>The throne room in Riddle Manor was mostly empty today. Only Lucius and Severus were in attendance, which could only mean one thing: Harry.</p><p>"Welcome, Severus," Voldemort smiled, seemingly very pleased. "Lucius tells me that the boy is progressing nicely."</p><p>Severus chanced his first glance at the blond who didn't seem to possess an ounce of shame, damn him. He wondered, just how good <em>were</em> Harry's acting skills, because as far as he knew, Harry was completely uneducated in the realm of sexual pleasures. It wasn't like he had indulged himself and played with the boy…Perhaps the boy had lied to the Dark Lord and had shagged the Weasley chit after all, or perhaps Granger in the tent while dear Ronald had abandoned them…</p><p>"Of course, my lord. It is well into July, after all. I will keep my word and have him ready for you by Yule."</p><p>"A fitting present," Voldemort chuckled. His laugh was rich and warm, almost human.</p><p>"Yes, I was quite impressed," Lucius said, as if he couldn't help himself, knowing Severus wanted to skin him alive. "Perhaps our lord would enjoy a demonstration?"</p><p>Severus' blood ran cold. He stepped forward. "My lord, I would ask you to give me more time. The boy has fallen badly ill and I suspect it is from the trial potion I slipped into his tea." He would never slip an unknown potion in another solution, because then he wouldn't know if the effects were due to the potion itself or an unexpected reaction, but Voldemort didn't know that.</p><p>"Ill or not, he's a slave," Lucius said. "<em>Use him</em>." There was a slight movement from beside the throne, and Severus could just make out that Draco had flinched back from his father's harsh words, understanding that they also applied to him, even if that wasn't the intention.</p><p>Voldemort reached down a hand to stroke Draco's hair and neck. With Nagini gone, it was almost like he needed something to touch while holding court. It wasn't like any of the other Death Eaters would willingly hold his hand, barring Bellatrix, of course.</p><p>"Lucius, are you the potions master in this room?"</p><p>Lucius looked like he'd been slapped and backtracked quickly. "No, my lord, I didn't mean to presume—!"</p><p>"<em>Crucio!</em>" Voldemort held the curse for a minute, watching with satisfaction as the proud man writhed on the floor.</p><p>"Severus, I trust your judgement in these matters. Harry has become increasingly precious to me. There is nothing I want more in this world that to have him bound to me completely, to have us join our <em>family</em>. Isn't that right, Draco?"</p><p>"Yes, my lord," came Draco's voice. He sounded earnest, but years of being the boy's teacher had taught Severus that Draco was simply acting. It was the <em>yes</em> Draco often used on Pansy to stop her from nagging him.</p><p>"So you see, Lucius, that if Severus says the boy needs time to recover, then I shall give it. I am a merciful lord."</p><p>Severus and Lucius both bowed their heads. This new Voldemort was sometimes harder to predict than the old one.</p><p>"But I am surprised that I have not been informed of the boy's state of health before now," Voldemort continued, with a dangerous edge to his voice.</p><p>"I had thought my potions would be enough, my lord. He has only been sick for the past few days."</p><p>"That is no excuse! I will be sending a Healer to figure out what must be done. I will not lose Harry due to your incompetence!"</p><p>"Thank you, my lord." Severus nearly sighed in relief and was ready to hear his dismissal. But luck was hardly ever in his favor.</p><p>"Lucius, leave us."</p><p>Voldemort looked down at Draco then, as if contemplating something. It was clear that the Dark Lord was obsessed, deranged, desperate even, to have Harry sitting beside Draco at the foot of his throne. No, on a throne of his own, his equal…When he next looked up, ruby eyes glinting, he fixed Severus with a deadly glare. The assault was fast and powerful, mercilessly ripping through the outer layer of Severus' occlumency shields. Voldemort was only intent upon one thing. He needed to know if Harry was safe. If the illness was serious.</p><p>When Voldemort abruptly pulled back, Severus was on his knees, panting. Severus had accompanied the Dark Lord through his mind, unable to block him out, but successfully able to flank him and redirect any memories that the Dark Lord was not hell bent on seeing. He was almost surprised when the Dark Lord only sought information of the boy's supposed illness. He landed in a memory of Friday, when Harry was making dinner unclothed, thank Merlin, with Draco sitting silently at the dining room table. It was touching, in an odd sort of way that Voldemort <em>cared</em>.</p><p>The truth of Harry's perfect health hung in the air between them. Severus braced himself. He was dead. He was dead. He was going to die. Hopefully Narcissa would receive the plans and move Harry before it was too late…</p><p>"A terrible illness," Voldemort finally spoke, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. Severus hardly dared to breathe. "I will send my best Healer as promised….But know this, Severus. If Harry should fall <em>ill</em> again, should anything befall him, between now and when I shall claim him as my equal, I shall not be so merciful. <em>Crucio!</em>"</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for all the support! Still planning out the sequel and making up my mind about the plot. Also note, I always thought that this would be a short story...I had all these scenes in my head and wanted to write it out, and then somehow it just kept getting longer?</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. The Mark</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which a Healer takes a vow.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Once again, Harry found himself studying the thin links that wound around his wrists. They looked so breakable, like jewelry even. He wondered if it were a perverse way of gift giving from Voldemort himself and if he should be flattered. Knowing his magic was out of reach, but wanting to try something anyway, he reached for where his core normally was and <em>pushed</em>. For a second, nothing happened, but then to his utter shock and delight, the bracelets glowed faintly red, before quickly returning to their normal state. And for a second, Harry could feel that they had a weakness, that they were indeed breakable.</p><p>The revelation floored him. Where had that magic come from and could he access it again? But try as he might, he was unable to reproduce the outcome. It gave him hope, however, that perhaps his magic would not forever be locked from him and that these chains would one day break.</p><p>He was lounging in Severus' bed, their bed, he supposed, wondering when Severus would be back. It was a bit pathetic really, but it wasn't like there was much else to do. He had explored what passed for a garden a total of three times. Each time was as boring as the last, and Severus had told him in no uncertain terms that he could not <em>improve the property</em> or seem to be actually on vacation. So Harry spent his days in Severus' company, having finally gotten the man to cave and allow him to assist in the brewing.</p><p>Severus might still need the pretense that the potion was for the Dark Mark, but he could tell when Severus caught himself slipping, hastily covering it up with a cough. But Harry knew. The potion was for Voldemort to remove the horcrux from his own soul.</p><p>Unless Severus was actually slipping on purpose…and unless, of course, Tom had lied…and maybe, in the end, it didn't really matter. Because at this point, Harry wasn't sure what means he wouldn't go to in order to escape from this abyss, even if it meant descending further into hell.</p><p>The front door creaked open and shut. He could hear Severus and another, unfamiliar voice, one that was nervous, scared, or likely both.</p><p>"Harry!" Severus's voice was commanding, but sounded strained like he was injured. It sent alarm bells ringing in Harry's head and he hastily ran for the door then stopped, remembering they had an unknown visitor, and so quickly shucked his clothes and tossed them into a drawer.</p><p>From the top of the stairs, he could see Severus leaning heavily against the wall, his face pale. Voldemort must not have been pleased, whatever had happened. His attention then shifted to the woman beside him, dressed in a uniform that Harry didn't recognize. Her face was lined with wrinkles and she held in her hand a large white trunk. When she saw him, it looked like she had seen a ghost.</p><p>"The Dark Lord has sent a Healer to ascertain the progression of your illness," Severus explained in clipped tones.</p><p>Harry nodded cautiously, not sure if he was going to like where this was going.</p><p>"I-I will need use of a bed and a table if you have one," the woman spoke up, her eyes darting around the room, as if Voldemort himself would pop out from the kitchen any second.</p><p>"Of course," Severus said. "You may use our bedroom. Follow me."</p><p>The woman nodded feverishly, trying not to lose her composure over the use of the words <em>our bedroom</em>. Harry tried to catch Severus' eyes, and perhaps ask what the hell was going on, but they were once again unreadable, blocking everyone out, including Harry.</p><p>The woman stood stiffly, highly uncomfortable being in the room alone with them as she placed her trunk on the dresser. "Mr. Potter…?" she asked cautiously, as if she needed to make sure.</p><p>Harry looked to Severus again. Was he allowed to talk? What was he allowed to say?</p><p>"Obviously," Severus drawled, arms crossed. "Get on with it."</p><p>"Oh, yes…" But the Healer did not make any move to start. She seemed conflicted, and eventually raised her eyes to Snape's. "As a Healer, I have certain duties to my patients." She held up a hand. "I understand that this is an extenuating circumstance, but I cannot perform the magic I need to unless we are the only two alone in this room."</p><p>Harry raised an eyebrow. Was that true? He had never been in St. Mungo's as a patient before. It sounded rather like a half-baked rescue plot to Harry. As if Severus would leave Harry and the Healer alone! But to Harry's surprise, Severus simply inclined his head.</p><p>"I have no need to watch. I have examined his body quite thoroughly in the past." Harry blushed, knowing Severus had never <em>examined</em> him the way he was implying, and was half tempted to say so. He didn't realize that the Healer took his words very much to heart until he glanced back at her. Her face was red and blotchy, her temper seemingly at the boiling point. She watched Severus leave the room like a hawk, before waving her wand and shutting the bedroom door.</p><p>"So Voldemort—" She flinched, "—has sent you to examine me?" Harry asked. Well that wasn't so bad. He'd been in the Hospital Wing more times than he could count and Madam Pomfrey had never seemed to discover his abusive home life, nor had she ever discovered the Aegis in his last two years at school.</p><p>"Yes, he says you had fallen ill, though, I admit I fail to see the signs…" She shook her head, as if she were imagining things. "Nevertheless, I will check. Now, lie down on the bed, love."</p><p>Harry complied, oddly bereft of modesty, as she pulled out some notes from her bag and waved her wand over him. The air in the room shifted and brightly colored lights began to emit from her wand as a quill scratched itself along the paper's surface. It didn't stop writing for a long time. So much pain in one small body, she lamented. So much suffering. "Mr. Potter…" she offered quietly. "I do not have to share what I have found with anyone, if you do not want me to. No matter who is in power, I still took my vows as a Healer, and I can still be bound by them if you just say the word."</p><p>Their eyes met and Harry understood what it was she was promising him. If Voldemort found out she attempted to conceal something from him, she would be killed.</p><p>Harry shook his head at first, then stopped. "I—Wait, what are you doing?"</p><p>"The rest of your examination, Mr. Potter," she said matter-of-factly, her hand coming down to press lightly against his chest. "I need to check you over physically for those things which my spell cannot detect. Then I will be done."</p><p>If she saw the rising panic in his eyes, she didn't mention it. Her hands were clinical as she pressed and prodded him. It was a good thing Severus had made him use the healing salve, or he'd look like a right mess right now. Harry had slathered it over the bruises Lucius had left, little bite marks and scratches over his hips and thighs. Severus had rubbed the salve onto his back on this very bed, his hands calm and warm and sure…</p><p>But even though the Healer was only doing her job, her touches made his skin fairly crawl. Would it be selfish of him to accept her offer and activate her vow of confidentiality? No one need know, not if she were careful, that anything took place between them. Voldemort simply could not know. And Severus…it was becoming harder and harder to resist the pull. He was finding it difficult these days to remember why they shouldn't claim each other, and it would tie Severus to him and not Narcissa…</p><p>He knew the exact moment when she found it. Her fingers had brushed over the mark at first, as she went to move the chain. Then her hands returned to the same spot and her gaze sharpened. She had gasped, bringing Harry's hand up to her face to get a better look. She seemed almost in awe.</p><p>"You…," she whispered and cast a furtive glance towards the door. "This...this is the mark of the Aegis. Mr. Potter, please, I need your affirmation to activate the vow <em>now</em>. This <em>cannot</em> leave this room."</p><p>"If he should find out that you have vowed not to speak…" Harry trailed off, glancing at her. He knew he would ask this of her, but he wanted to be sure it was the right decision, whatever that meant, perhaps, guiltily, to soothe his own conscience.</p><p>"Mr. Potter," she said, straightening her back so that she stood at her full height. "Perhaps you do not quite understand. If You-Know-Who should learn of this and attempt to take its power for himself, my existence would be forfeit anyway. He could <em>turn back time</em> far greater than what a time turner could do. Our world would cease to exist. Now, Mr. Potter, please, your word!"</p><p>By the end of her speech, they could both hear the footsteps coming up the stairs. Harry thought fondly that it was Severus' way of letting him know he was near, as he knew the man could be silent as a bat when he wanted to be.</p><p>"Alright," Harry said, as a tongue of magic flicked out and wiped the words clean off the page.</p><p>She nearly fainted in relief just as the door creaked open. Severus stood there in a black button-down shirt with its sleeves rolled up, his cloak discarded downstairs. It revealed his pale arms, and—was that blood? Alarmed, Harry scrambled out of bed to inspect further. It was clear that Voldemort had punished him, using a cutting charm to slice open the potions master's wrists and forearms. Harry would bet that the cuts were all over his body. At that moment, a spectacular tremor ran across Severus' body, an after effect of prolonged cruciatus. Just what had happened that day to cause the Dark Lord so much rage? And to send a Healer after Harry too…</p><p>"Severus, are you alright?" Harry asked, his hands flitting over every inch of Severus' exposed skin, uncaring that he was unclothed. "Was it Lucius?" he wanted to know. "But I did so well for him…" He brushed against Severus' torso by accident, which was still clothed, pulling an unexpected flinch from the usually dour man. Harry's eyebrows shot to his hairline. He whipped around.</p><p>"Please, madam, you have to help him!" he begged, his eyes going round. She seemed hesitant for all of one minute, before nodding curtly. Maybe it was from some higher morals of being a Healer to help even the vilest of humans, or maybe it was because she could not refuse Harry Potter this one wish while he was trapped as the Dark Lord's prisoner.</p><p>She murmured a few spells that Harry didn't know the name of and all the while, Harry clung like a little lost kitten to Severus' side, the Aegis pushing itself to the forefront. It was abundantly obvious that Severus had taken this punishment for him. It filled Harry with a kind of warmth, a barbaric sense of being valued measured by the extent of Severus' injuries…Severus, who was doing his best to get them both out of there, who was even willing to tolerate his nightmares, who wiped away his tears and held him after Lucius had attacked him…What greater proof did Harry need that the man was on his side?</p><p>It took Harry a minute to realize that Severus had been carding his hands through his hair, soothing the Aegis and letting Harry return to the surface. Severus' gaze at the moment was unguarded, and of course, dimmed the moment he caught Harry paying attention.</p><p>A strangled noise. Harry had almost forgotten the Healer was still in the room until the chanting stopped. The Healer looked from Severus to Harry, and back again, before clearing her throat.</p><p>"You should make a full recovery," she said in a voice that was dramatically less acidic than it could have been. She shot Harry a pitying look before standing up. "Let your lord know that I have fulfilled my duty," she said to Snape.</p><p>"Of course." His voice was smooth as he too stood up. "Allow me to escort you to the edge of the wards."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you lovelies for all the comments. You guys are too intelligent by far, but I don't want to give any spoilers away!</p><p>Also, no one asked, but the best ambiguous Snape I've read is in Nights of Gethsemane, where his genius is only fully revealed in Invictus (the Snape POV piece) by starcrossed archived by HPFandom on AO3. My other favorite with ambiguous Snape is In Between Days by atrata on AO3.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. The Confession</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Harry makes a confession.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Severus returned to their bedroom, he found Harry tucked into the covers, only the tuft of his hair sticking out.</p><p>"Your acting skills have gotten better," Severus remarked, sitting on the bed beside him. "She was in here a while with you. Don't tell me you were really ill, after all."</p><p>Harry couldn't help the small smile that spread over his face at the concerned tone in Severus' voice. Even in the slightly jealous edge he could hear that the Healer had been with him awhile.</p><p>"Why did you tell Him that I was sick?" Harry asked, sitting up and leaning on the headboard. "He'll know you lied after he sees the Healer."</p><p>"Nothing a quick <em>confundus</em> charm shouldn't take care of," Severus said nonchalantly. "I was punished for failing to produce you today. Lucius has been telling tales and the Dark Lord wanted a show…"</p><p>"Thank you," Harry said.</p><p>Severus nodded. "I did it for both of us, Harry. Lucius is fond of lying when it suits him, but had I asked you to suddenly crawl naked across the throne room and fellate me, I'm sure the Dark Lord would have noticed a few discrepancies."</p><p>Harry nodded, his fingers ghosting over the mark on his wrist. Guilt ate at him. Perhaps, when he was so sure he was protecting Severus that day when Lucius arrived, he was only giving him more to work with. Severus and he were a team. Hadn't Severus showed him that today? He had taken a punishment because as far as he knew, Harry was untrained. He had no way of knowing that his punishment was for naught, that Harry would have easily been able to perform and do just what Severus had suggested. That was the danger of keeping so much information hidden. It fragmented their joint efforts, and Harry was sitting on perhaps the largest secret of all, one he knew would certainly affect their future plans.</p><p>He steeled himself. "Severus…there's something I need to tell you."</p><p>His emerald eyes looked watery with tears. Severus' gazed at him concerned. "Harry?" he asked gently.</p><p>"I couldn't think of a way to tell you," Harry said. "I suppose, I was afraid to tell you…I…Look, Severus, we have a bond." He raised his wrist up like a sacrifice, waiting for the verdict as Severus took it gently and turned it this way and that. Severus didn't say anything for a moment. His silence terrified him and Harry, fearing rejection, plowed on. "I think it's leftover from a bond I had with Dumbledore. I didn't know about it, I swear! It wasn't until Dumbledore's death that I started realizing that I wasn't the same."</p><p>"What kind of bond, Harry?" Severus asked softly.</p><p>"It's called an Aegis bond. It's for the protection of the bonded and, well, there's a component of it that makes me want to please you, you know…fix your drinks, make you meals…touch you."</p><p>A light seemed to go on behind Severus' dark eyes. "Ah, I see."</p><p>"And well, I don't exactly know the extent of the bond," Harry confessed, "because Dumbledore never told me about it. In fact, I think he wanted the Aegis to dissolve upon his death, but it didn't. It was never completed and so latched onto you as its most suitable protector…I, I'm sorry, Severus!"</p><p>Severus shushed him gently and wrapped his arms comfortingly around the shaking boy in front of him. "It is only natural, Harry. This must mean a great deal to you or else you wouldn't have tried to hide it. Did you fear I would reject you had I known? I would not be averse to completing the bond with you." His voice was so soothing in his ear. Harry felt like he could just melt…</p><p>"But you haven't even heard what you need to do!" Harry protested, his old insecurities coming to the fore. The Dursleys had rejected him. Ron had abandoned him at each and every turn when he needed him the most. Dumbledore had betrayed him. Time and time again, when Harry needed something, the people he was told to trust most had failed him. Yes, he had feared how Severus would react to the knowledge of a bond…but even more so, he feared how Severus would react to himself.</p><p>"I assume it's something unpleasant like bloodletting," Severus mused, nuzzling Harry's neck.</p><p>Harry shook his head. "It needs to be consummated." He hardly dared to breathe after that. He could feel Severus shift away from him so that he could look straight into Harry's face. He placed a finger beneath Harry's chin and forced the boy's emerald eyes to meet his.</p><p>"So that is why you didn't tell me," Severus whispered, the accusation and hurt clear in his voice.</p><p>"<em>No</em>," Harry denied, "I wouldn't, I mean I don't mind. I actually really…like you," he admitted, his cheeks tinging pink. "I just wasn't sure if you would, if you would want me. You seemed so adamant about not doing anything between us, I just…"</p><p>"Correction, Harry. I wasn't going to break you <em>for the Dark Lord</em>. I have no objections to consummating the bond with you. Surely, you must have realized that by now? We share a bed, Harry, something I was certainly not accustomed to before you came…I think you knew I would say yes," Severus said perceptively. "Perhaps the issue was that, after everything I've done for you, you simply did not trust me."</p><p><em>Damn Severus for always being right.</em> "But, you said it was wise not to trust you," Harry said.</p><p>Severus blinked. "I lied."</p><p>The irony was too much for Harry to handle. His laughter bubbled over, contagious in its mirth. Did Severus even know the extent of what Harry felt for him? How far beyond "like" his attraction went? How the Aegis and he were rapidly becoming one? How every touch felt like the break of day? He needed Severus to know suddenly.</p><p>"Harry, I—"</p><p>Harry's lips crashed against his, taking the potions master by surprise. A pleasant one, if the presence of Severus' tongue in his mouth was anything to go by. This was what he had been waiting for all along…Harry moaned into the kiss, tasting him, wanting to wash away the past, like an animal, wanting no other scent but his, no other mark but his…Why had he waited so long to do this? Severus cupped the side of Harry's face tenderly, regarding him as if he were the most precious creature on earth.</p><p>Harry would have given him anything then and Severus probably knew it.</p><p>Then without warning, the potions master stood up. "We will complete the bond, but not now, not today. It's been a long day for both of us and I rather think we should take some time to plan before we dive headlong into danger."</p><p>Harry couldn't help the smile that spread over his face.</p><p>"I look forward to the plunge."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Before The Confession</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which a vow is broken.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Severus was transfixed. Harry was learning against him, worried for him, his concern warming even the depths of Severus' heart. He absently carded his hands through Harry's hair as he was wont to do before bed each night. He found that the gesture soothed them both, perhaps because neither of them had gotten nearly enough affection as children growing up.</p><p>Then Harry's emerald eyes turned to his and he came to, feeling like he was caught yearning for something he shouldn't…</p><p>The Healer made an odd little choked gasp in her throat, capturing Severus' attention immediately. His eyes narrowed as the Healer looked between them on the bed, her eyebrows rising just a bit. She cleared her throat.</p><p>"You should make a full recovery," she said stiffly, but she was looking at Harry when said it, her eyes full of meaning that Severus didn't understand. Then she turned to Severus with something like a dare in her eyes. "Let your lord know that I have fulfilled my duty."</p><p>Swiftly, Severus stood up, having caught the scent of blood.</p><p>"Of course." Severus said silkily. "Allow me to escort you to the edge of the wards."</p><p>The woman was clearly frazzled as she followed Severus outside, more so than when she had first come in. She clutched her white trunk close to her chest, as if hoping that it would shield her from any Death Eaters prowling the property. It was clear she wanted to be gone, far, far away from there as soon as possible.</p><p>Severus stopped walking and slowly turned to face her. With a flick of his wand, they were encased in a silencing spell. Another flick, <em>expelliarmus</em>. Her wand flew into his hand. Her steps faltered.</p><p>"You were in there a while with him," Severus said mildly, watching her pale further and further. "You forget that as a potions master, I was required to take courses in medimagic and healing. So just what <em>were</em> you doing with him?"</p><p>She pursed her lips. "I have fulfilled my duty. You lord required me to perform a full examination of the subject and so I did." She moved to walk past him, but he blocked her easily, wand out. "I cannot disclose what I found," she said, almost triumphantly. "I am bound by my vows to uphold patient confidentiality, or have you forgotten about those vows in your time as a Death Eater?"</p><p>But Severus would not budge. He leaned closer to her so that she was forced to take a step back. Something like fear shot through her eyes as she scanned the forest behind him, hoping in vain to see the flickering edge of the wards.</p><p>"Ah, but I only have Harry's best interests at heart," Severus replied. "You see, Madam, I would do <em>anything</em> to protect Harry."</p><p>"You cannot force me to tell," she repeated staunchly.</p><p>"Oh, but I can. I believe the wording of the vow went something along the lines of this <em>That I as a healer shall not disclose my patient's conditions or die</em>. Tell me, are you afraid of death?"</p><p>She shook her head rapidly. "You wouldn't! Your lord has need of me. Now let me pass! Let me pass, I say! Let me—"</p><p>His hand was on her neck, her windpipe crushed beneath his grip. His wand was raised, poised to strike. "Do not test me!"</p><p>"I-I-" she gurgled. The trunk dropped from her grip and fell softly on the grass. It looked like she wanted to say something, pounding against his arm with her hands, trying to peel his fingers off her throat. Her face was starting to turn blue.</p><p>He released her.</p><p>She collapsed on her knees, her hands coming up to massage her throat. Between deep lungfuls of air, she gasped, "I…can…t-tell you…about you."</p><p>Severus watched impassively as she attempted to haul herself to her feet. "Explain," he commanded.</p><p>She looked conflicted for all of five seconds, the recent pain of being strangled fresh in her mind, before she opened her mouth. "I do not know for sure," she began, gulping. "But if you were to give me your right wrist."</p><p>Pointing his wand at her with his other hand, he thrust out his arm. If she knew what was good for her, she wouldn't try anything. She brushed her thumb over the pulse point on his wrist and sighed deeply. She chose her next words with care, trying her best not to trigger the vow. "It's growing in," she said, then coughed.</p><p>"What is it?" he snapped.</p><p>"It's called the Aegis."</p><p>Severus continued to glare at her.</p><p>She hastily added, "It's a bond between two individuals, between—" The vow cut her off and she flushed at her own incompetence. "I have told you enough. Surely one of <em>your</em> standing would be able to figure it out."</p><p>Severus reeled back as it hit him. He and Harry shared a bond. He and Harry…and this woman had tried to hide it from him!</p><p>"How was it formed?" Severus demanded. "Tell me what you know of it! What is the nature of this bond?"</p><p>The woman regarded him angrily. "My wand?"</p><p>Reluctantly, Severus threw it at her feet. She snatched it up.</p><p>"The Aegis is an ancient protection bond," she said. "I do not know much because it has fallen out of use. I cannot tell you more." She held herself stiffly, wand in one hand, trunk in the other. "Now, I will be on my way."</p><p>Years of being a spy taught Severus the tell-tale signs of a lie. It was instinctual at this point in his life and it was obvious she was lying. She knew something she was refusing to tell him. She had tried to keep his Harry from him, had tried to keep him ignorant of their bond! She was a threat…who knew what else she knew or who else she would tell? If one whisper reached the Dark Lord's ears…</p><p>He struck her square in the back, <em>"Stupefy!" </em>She had just reached the edge of the wards and now he mercilessly dragged her back. He turned her around to look into his eyes. "<em>Legilimens!"</em></p><p>Her mind was an open book, completely unguarded as she had been taken by total surprise. Her recent thoughts were of escaping Severus and her next destination. It never occurred to her that, one foot out of the anti-apparition wards, she would be taken back. He watched the memory of Harry laying on the bed. His expression one of dull acceptance as she found the mark upon his skin, surprise shooting through her. He hadn't even blinked.</p><p><em>Harry had known</em>.</p><p>Severus couldn't help but feel a stab of betrayal, like a lash through his heart, as he realized that Harry had known he was bonded to Severus and hadn't said a word. His rage spilled over into his assault on the woman's mind and he could feel her slipping away…</p><p>He quickly sought out the memories relating to the Aegis itself. A protection bond that didn't require the knowledge or consent of either party as long as the Aegis itself agreed that the match was suitable…a bond that was completed with sex. A bond that marked Harry as his.</p><p>And there was more…quickly, quickly, the woman's conscious was dimming…an aspect of time, a ripple in time-space, the Aegis' failsafe…The Aegis needed to be fed with physical affection, its sole purpose to keep the bonded alive, and if the binder so willed, worlds could split asunder…dimming, dimming, <em>gone</em>.</p><p>Severus found himself looking straight into the empty eyes of the Healer, her face still frozen in surprise. He hastily let her drop to the ground.</p><p>The vow had taken its payment.</p><p>And yet, Severus couldn't bring himself to care. Maybe it was because she had done him and Harry a terrible wrong, or perhaps it was foolish of her to agree to share secrets with Harry Potter of all people, when she was hired by the Dark Lord. He watched her body go up in flames before vanishing the evidence.</p><p>He would be tender, yes. He wouldn't even need to pretend to care for the boy…but one way or another, whether he milked the truth from him with love or torture, Harry was going to be confessing everything <em>today</em>.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Friday Night</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus drinks.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Severus needed a drink. It was a good thing that it was Friday and Malfoy, for all his faults, had a decent collection of liquor. It had been two weeks since Harry had confessed to him. Two weeks since their first kiss, and Severus could hardly think straight anymore.</p><p>That day, he had wanted much more than a single kiss, and he could just tell that Harry had wanted more too. Something in him had flared to life, like a puzzle piece clicking into place. A flame. It was alternatively awakened and calmed by the kiss. Severus hadn't known what to make of it, only that somewhere, in the back of his mind, a little voice was telling him that it would have been wrong. Wrong to shove Harry back onto the bed, or fling him over the sofa, or bend him over the dining room table and…<em>take him</em>.</p><p>But he had stopped himself, hadn't he? The Aegis was a protection bond that just simply needed to be consummated. That didn't make Harry <em>his</em>, no matter what Severus might have wanted. <em>Ah, but Narcissa said that Harry had taken a liking to you, </em>his inner voice whispered. <em>You already claimed him, in word if not in deed. It wouldn't be rape, not if Harry wanted it.</em></p><p>Severus couldn't help but think there was a flaw in his logic in there somewhere. Maybe the answer was at the bottom of his glass.</p><p>He took another sip.</p><p>"Ah, there you are Severus. The festivities are just about to begin. Rodolphus has found a pretty muggle woman for tonight," Lucius said, slipping into the shadowed corner Severus had holed himself in, as if Lucius hadn't been actively trying to get Severus punished.</p><p>Severus curled his lip. "A muggle, really Lucius? I thought you knew better than to sully yourself with them."</p><p>"A rare indulgence," Lucius said, noncommittally. "Like all things, it is fine in moderation."</p><p>Rape in moderation. How lovely.</p><p>"What do you want?" Severus asked, getting straight to the point.</p><p>But Lucius only shook his head, waving his hand, as if to say that there were no ulterior motives. "I wanted to <em>clear the air</em> between us," Lucius said, with a sigh. "After all, you are Draco's godfather."</p><p>"In other words," Severus sneered. "You consider us even."</p><p>"Does that surprise you, Severus?" Lucius asked lightly, his silver eyes peering at the dark haired man over his own glass of fine, golden liquor.</p><p>"No, I can't say that it does."</p><p>"Good…More wine?"</p><p>Why not?</p><p>A house-elf appeared and magically began to refill Severus' glass. When it was full, the bottle and the elf both popped away.</p><p>"How <em>is</em> Draco doing these days?" Lucius wondered, his tone unreadable.</p><p>Severus blinked. So that's what this was about. Lucius had finally come to his senses and realized that Severus was housing his spawn one day a week, and Lucius, being the model father <em>missed</em> him.</p><p>"Quiet," Severus said. "He keeps mostly to himself. The Dark Lord has taken to healing him before sending him through the floo, so I cannot be certain of his treatment there…His appetite is unaffected."</p><p>Lucius nodded, sipping his own drink slowly. "And his progress with Potter?"</p><p>Severus stiffened imperceptivity. "Passable…" he said, as if he knew what Lucius was talking about.</p><p>"Only passable?" Lucius asked, arching an eyebrow. Unconsciously, or perhaps consciously, he licked his lips. "I would have given him an Outstanding…If I didn't know any better, I would say you were jealous."</p><p>"It doesn't matter," Severus said, not liking what Lucius was implying.</p><p>"Of course not. Our lord's will comes before all."</p><p>Severus found himself glancing at the clock above the mantle place. It was nine. He usually left the manor around midnight, but he was suddenly itching to return to the house.</p><p>The Dark Lord had given Draco a task without his knowledge…it was common practice for the Dark Lord to pit his Death Eater's against each other, believing that the competition would improve their performance. It was even believable that Draco wouldn't confide in him. Draco certainly hadn't during his sixth year. But Severus had thought they were beyond that…Just what had Voldemort asked the boy to do? Severus started counting back in his mind. It was nearing the end of July. Just how long had Draco been coming over to the house?</p><p>"I need to tend to one of my potions," Severus said sharply, putting his glass down on one of the ornate side tables. "It is rather unstable and needs to be stirred every four hours."</p><p>Lucius' face fell. "Of course," he said, stepping aside to let Severus pass. "I will just have to tell Rodolphus that we are one player short…"</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Severus could hardly breathe as he strode briskly to the apparition point beyond the manor's wards. Proud white peacocks roamed the garden. If he kicked them, Lucius would have his head. Blasted birds…He held tightly onto his wand and popped away.</p><p>The same starless night greeted him upon his arrival. The moon was in prime form tonight, a full moon, big and round and white. Fenrir would be on the prowl tonight…he wondered absently if Lupin would be among them, still carrying out Albus' last misguided orders to infiltrate the pack.</p><p>He didn't need a spell to move around silently, to keep the doors from creaking as he opened them, but he cast one anyway. No more than a shadow, Severus entered the house, wand aloft. He was a man of reason, of planning, a Slytherin to the core…and yet, he found himself moving swiftly through the house, clearing the first floor and glancing up the stairs.</p><p>He heard them first. A breathless moan, flesh against flesh… He flicked his wand at the door so that he could see within, the occupants none the wiser.</p><p>Harry was on his back on the bed with Draco above him, straddling him, kissing him deeply. Severus sucked in a breath. He wanted to interrupt them immediately, but something held him still. Something like morbid curiosity…Draco's cock was at full attention, leaking at the tip, hitting against Harry's stomach as he rutted against him like a wild animal. But Severus only had eyes for Harry, who was staring up at the ceiling, eyes glossy, just <em>taking</em> it. Then Draco aimed a little too low, a little too close, and Harry cried out.</p><p>In one movement, Severus had blasted open the door and stood above them. His anger was singing on his skin. He would have been surprised if someone told him he wasn't glowing. A monster roared in his chest.</p><p>"What is going on here?" he thundered. Magic whipped in the air around them. Draco was blasted from the bed and slammed against the wall.</p><p>"Oh fuck! That hurt!" Draco cried, having the gall to sound indignant.</p><p>Harry scrambled from the bed, arms up in protest. Severus brushed him aside. He couldn't see straight, couldn't focus on Harry when all he wanted to do was <em>destroy, destroy, destroy…</em></p><p>"No listen, Severus," Harry pleaded, when Severus hadn't put his wand down, "He was helping us!"</p><p>Severus rounded on Harry, eyes blazing. "Helping us by fucking you?" he challenged.</p><p>Harry shook his head frantically. "We weren't going to go that far!"</p><p>"Do you think me blind as well as dumb, Mr. Potter?" Severus then returned his attention to Draco who was oddly cradling his hand like he'd been burned, though it was his head that hit the wall… "Draco, who sent you?" Severus demanded, taking a step forward towards the boy, wanting to throttle him.</p><p>Draco leapt to his feet. "The Dark Lord, obviously! But I didn't do it for him! I did it for you, you git!"</p><p>"GET OUT!" Severus roared.</p><p>Draco's silver eyes widened in real fear before he ran from the room like Death itself were after him. They heard the floo activate downstairs and then Severus felt the wards alerting him to Draco's departure. Good! They were alone. Harry was staring at Severus like he had never seen him before. Harry's face was flushed, like he was embarrassed at getting caught, not like he was ashamed. And he was staring oddly at the spot next to the crater in the wall where Draco had just left.</p><p>Did he miss Draco already? Severus wondered angrily, his jealousy coming to the fore and rippling out in dark, tumultuous waves. Harry started backing up as Severus advanced. Too close, not close enough… Severus' strong hands grabbed Harry's wrists in an iron grip. His emerald eyes fluttered once, as if understanding he were no more than a butterfly pinned against the wall. Severus' face was mere inches from his, his features contorted in pain and rage.</p><p>"Why would you let Draco use you like that?" Severus hissed, punching the wall beside Harry's head and making the boy quake. "I claimed you to keep you from being the Death Eaters' whore. I have sacrificed to keep you safe! But I cannot protect you if you <em>insist</em> on letting people fuck you behind my back!"</p><p>Harry had expected Severus to be displeased with his plan, perhaps even make fun of his intellect. He was unprepared for the unbridled fury coming from the man who was typically so calm and collected.</p><p>"Draco wasn't doing anything I didn't want him to," Harry shot back. "We made a deal, he and I. You might be okay with dying at the end of the year, but I'm not!"</p><p>"And did you know the Dark Lord had sent him to befriend you and train you?"</p><p>"Of course I did!" Harry screamed. "Did <em>you</em>?"</p><p>Severus growled. Of course he didn't! "You will not be doing that anymore! Do you understand me, Harry?"</p><p>Harry's eyes flashed. "So you would rather die when next Voldemort wants me to perform? At least I had a plan, Severus! I can't just wait around until you brew us out of here!"</p><p>"Then you should have come to me if you wanted to be used so badly!" Severus hissed, pushing his knee between Harry's thighs. <em>Dominate, own, protect…</em></p><p>"Like you would have agreed!" Harry laughed wildly in his face. "You <em>agreed </em>to complete the Aegis with me, but you <em>still </em>haven't!"</p><p>Severus pressed Harry's body further into the wall, making known his own throbbing hardness.</p><p>"That can change!" Severus said viciously and dragged Harry onto the bed, silently spelling Harry's wrists to the headboard. He roughly pulled Harry's legs apart and settled in between them, his dark eyes glittering with an eerie light.</p><p>"Wait, no, you're not really going to—!" Harry whimpered, as if realizing just how serious Severus was.</p><p>"You still don't get it, do you, Harry?" Severus asked, his voice like velvet as he began to strip, leaving layers of black clothing to fall to the floor…</p><p>"I understand that you don't really want to do this," Harry gasped, tugging at his bonds. "Your breath smells like alcohol. You've been drinking tonight, Severus, remember? No, please, Severus, don't-!"</p><p>Severus backhanded Harry across the face, causing the boy to finally cease his babbling. The look Harry gave him was shuttered, as if the light of the world had been snuffed out at once.</p><p>"You're mine!" Severus hissed, his finger circling the boy's hole before slipping it inside. <em>He had potions downstairs. Lubricants, pain relievers, aphrodisiacs…</em>and he would use none of them. He wanted Harry to feel him pounding inside of him, wanted him to remember in the dull ache the next morning Harry belonged to no one but him. He slipped two more fingers inside the boy, stretching him, pumping his fingers in and out.</p><p>The Aegis in Harry keened, wanted nothing more than to be <em>completed, full, satisfied</em>, sending extra waves of pleasure through the boy, making it hard for those emerald eyes to hold only resentment. Harry's eyes flickered down to Severus' wrist, a wrist that had been bare that morning but which now bore the silver mark. Harry wanted this to happen, wanted it more than anything in the world…but not like this. He wanted to have sex with <em>Severus</em>, not the Aegis that was pulling Severus' body like a puppet on a string.</p><p>He took a deep breath. "Yours," Harry repeated cautiously, trying desperately to calm the wildly fluctuating bond between them. "No one else's but yours."</p><p>A little light seemed to come back into Severus' eyes at Harry's words, but not nearly enough. Severus positioned himself at Harry's entrance and thrust inside without preamble, giving no time for Harry to get used to the sensation. As he began to move, Severus seemed to return to himself more. His thrusts became less violent and his hand came down to tend to Harry's own cock that had since wilted.</p><p>Severus couldn't help but feel unbelievably pleased. Unloved all his life, never picked first, always last, not even second best…and now finally, here was something that was all his own. And he did own it, didn't he? He was here <em>first</em>.</p><p>"Lucius never did this to you did he?" Severus grunted, aiming for that spot that had Harry seeing stars. The boy moaned. "Draco has never had you like I've had you, has he?"</p><p>"No," Harry agreed, feeling rather breathless.</p><p>Severus smiled, a cold, cruel smile, never stopping the motion of his hips. "I'm your first, Harry. How does it feel to know you belong to me now?"</p><p>To that, Harry did not reply.</p><p>Severus tensed above him, before coming, groaning low in his throat. Harry came not long after, brought to release by skilled, potion-stained fingers. There were no sounds or lights. There was no cause for celebration. Yet, they both knew that the bond had settled, somewhere between the heart and the soul and the mind and the body…</p><p>For a moment, neither of them moved. Then Severus slipped out of him carefully and got up from the bed, walking towards the door like a man in a trance. His strings had been cut, leaving just the man that Harry loved, filled with nothing but regret.</p><p>Harry watched him leave, feeling boneless from the orgasmic pleasure the Aegis had shot through him. It had been wonderful, really, the sensations, if only his heart agreed. Belatedly, he realized that he was now free from his restraints and slowly brought his wrist to his face, studying the new silver line that circled the rest of the mark.</p><p>Finally, finally, the anchor in his chest was quiet. <em>It was done</em>.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Don't hate me. Comments appreciated!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Tom Visits Again</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Tom visits again.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>…there were torches below the ministry. Magic here was unpredictable, acted in ways that didn't follow the rules of the rest of the world…the ministry had been built on top of the cavern of anomalies, literally and figuratively, built upon secrets…even the Unspeakables were not aware of everything that went on in the rooms, the chambers, the caverns, the dungeons…</p><p>Harry was dragged to a stone dais, runes cut into its side, a spot of outside moonlight streaming in through the ceiling, despite the fact they were so far down below, it could not possibly be the real moon...</p><p>Jaggers, long black hair tied back in a ponytail, striking midnight blue eyes, decorated auror, dressed in his auror robes, shameless…</p><p>"Do you know where we are, Potter?" he asked, spreading Harry's limbs to the far corners of the table, a knife in his hands, gleaming in the torchlight.</p><p>"N-no…"</p><p>"We are in the Room of Sacrifice."</p><p>The coldness of the stone seeped into Harry's skin and he shivered. His eyes sought out the beam of moonlight, trying to find its origin, a small window perhaps, to crawl through and escape.</p><p>"A whole room dedicated to sacrifice?" Harry asked.</p><p>Jaggers shrugged, running hands along Harry's exposed chest. "There's a room for time, for love, for death…why not sacrifice?" He thumb brushed against Harry's nipple. He shuddered.</p><p>"What are you sacrificing for?"</p><p>"Oh, this and that…" The auror grasped Harry's length and began to stroke it, making Harry harden against his will. "It has been said that dementors are not from our world. Did you know that Harry, or has your Defense Against the Dark Arts education been lacking of late?"</p><p>"What do you mean?" Harry gasped.</p><p>"The dementors travelled to our world long ago, when two universes intersected. Just a split second in time, and they were able to cross the barrier…there's a whole team of Unspeakables down here studying them. Have you ever heard the cries of a dementor? I have never thought I'd feel sorry for one, but yes, even they can feel pain…Ah, McCalister, right on time, and oh, you have brought our friend…"</p><p>Harry's eyes bugged out of his head as he saw McCalister, short brown hair, brown eyes, scar along his temple, leading a frail, skeletal body on a leash…</p><p>McCalister laughed. "You didn't imagine there was nothing beneath its robes, did you?"</p><p>The air grew colder, far colder than the warm summer evening outside, colder than the torches could help…the dementor was skin and bone, bluish-black skin, a featureless face, with the mere suggestion of a mouth and eyes and nose…</p><p>"There's tremendous power in soul magic," Jaggers continued softly. "Soul magic, sex magic, and blood magic. It's how the dementors were able to open the portal in the first place. Where does the soul go when a dementors kisses them? Does it return back to the universe where dementors first originated? Does the power to open the worlds still exist within them?"</p><p>Harry fought to stay awake. Lily's voice rang out against his skull…take Harry and run! Her pleas echoing and then fading to the background…the dementor looked so heartbroken. Taken from its fold in Azkaban and made into a test subject, and now…brought to the room of sacrifice.</p><p>"We've been told, Potter, that you know how to cast a patronus," Jaggers continued, playing with Harry's balls absently, rolling them around in his hand. "Dumbledore has told us to test you and what vague instructions from our benevolent leader."</p><p>"Get on with it," McCalister grunted, "The thing creeps me out, even if they removed its vacuole."</p><p>"We want to see if the rumors were true," Jaggers said. "The dementor is harmless. They removed its stomach, so to speak, so even if it were to kiss you, it would have nowhere to go and return to your body. It is the leading theory that a patronus can destroy a dementor, but they always flee from its light and never give it a chance to touch them, but you see, this dementor cannot escape…unless, in order to save itself, it opens up the portal again."</p><p>"Why can't you cast the patronus?" Harry asked, barely holding on at this point.</p><p>It was McCalister who answered this time. "We could, of course, but the one who casts the patronus will be the one to hold the portal open. That's why we've chosen this room…the experience for you should not be pleasant." He smiled, showing a row of white, gleaming teeth. "No one knows if it will work. The Unspeakables are dying to have their answer, but of course, it would be unethical for them to test it…"</p><p>Jaggers' movements became hurried. He pushed his fingers into the unresisting body, pressing against his prostrate, using his other hand to fist his cock. "Sex magic," Jaggers spoke as Harry was forced to ejaculate. "Blood magic…" He took the knife, reminiscent of the night that Voldemort had risen from the cauldron, and sliced open Harry's arm, letting the blood drip down onto the table. "<em>Soul magic…</em>" They all turned to the dementor that looked like it was cowering, its feet not fully touching the floor.</p><p>Harry recognized in the creature a kindred, tortured soul.</p><p>Jaggers didn't release Harry from his binds, only shoved a wand into his hands, one created by the ministry in secret, one that would allow Moody or whoever was in charge of him that day to control what magic he was allowed to cast. He couldn't even cast a <em>lumos</em>. Only <em>expecto patronum </em>would come forth today. But of course, they all knew what Harry was thinking as he grasped the wand, that he desired to kill them all…Harry's face was turned towards the dementor, his cheek pressed against the stone. His arm throbbed. What little pleasure he had gotten out of Jaggers' ministrations was overshadowed by the pain, the self-loathing, the ugliness…</p><p>"Do it, boy!" McCalister commanded, struggling to keep the dementor in place as it strained on its chain. "Do it now!"</p><p>And deep in the depths of the ministry, Harry did.</p><p>"<em>Expecto patronum!</em>" His silver stag bloomed from the end of his wand, charging the dementor, like opposite poles of a magnet, drawn to one another…</p><p>The dementor screeched...</p><p>Then there was nothing.</p><p>Jaggers and McCalister exchanged a look. McCalister barked a laugh, "How anticlimactic…I win, of course. I get to train the boy for the weekend."</p><p>And as they dragged Harry away from the chamber on stumbling feet, Harry shut his eyes.</p><p>It hadn't been anticlimactic at all, Harry thought in his last conscious moments.</p><p>
  <em>McCalister pushing his flesh into him…it hurt, his insides felt raw…</em>
</p><p>Harry remembered the way time itself had stilled, the way the chamber sang, its walls reverberating with ancient magic, a bright, brilliant moon flooding him with light…</p><p>
  <em>"What a fucking whore, you are…"</em>
</p><p>A new sky had opened on the roof of the chamber…a doorway to another world, the burning, Harry's limbs being pulled apart, or was that now? He was being pulled apart now…</p><p>He could not hold the doorway open…The dementor floated upwards, dissolving through the chains that rattled to the ground…<em>McCalister shoving his tongue in his mouth, the walls of the ministry witness to it all…</em>it would make no difference, in the end, whether Voldemort lived or died...Pleading with Dumbledore for mercy…no mercy came…Where was the end?</p><p>Please, please, please, please…He could hear himself from far away, begging the headmaster to save him. Anything, he'd do anything, please, please…Absolutely broken. His soul, hurt beyond repair. His heart aching…</p><p>And then the memory froze.</p><p>Black.</p><p>A world of nothing.</p><p>And then a light.</p><p>Tom sat at the conference table across from him, his brown eyes gleaming.</p><p>"What vivid dreams you're having tonight, my Harry," he said, a touch of concern in his voice, only belied by the spark in his eyes. "What could possibly have brought this on?"</p><p>It took Harry a minute to take stock of himself. Clean, fully clothed, his hair even combed, though untamed. This was not a dream or a vision. This was happening in the here and now. Harry folded his hands in front of him.</p><p>"You experience everything I do. You tell me," Harry said testily.</p><p>"Correction. I live through you and what happens to you, but I do not know exactly what you feel. Our souls aren't one."</p><p>"But you can guess."</p><p>"Oh, yes," Tom purred, "I can guess…Did you really think it was wise to tell Severus about the Aegis, Harry? Just a few months ago, you were adamant you would not. Is it perhaps that the traitor has broken you after all?"</p><p>"I'm not broken," Harry muttered. "I just, I didn't expect him to react that way. I knew he wouldn't be thrilled with me and Draco but…"</p><p>"You need to be careful, Harry. These bonds are dangerous…may I?" Tom slowly reached for Harry's wrist, as if he were trying not to scare a wild animal. His touch was warm, his fingers soft against Harry's skin. Tom studied the mark intently. "Did I not tell you that I studied these bonds in my youth?"</p><p>He did? Of course he did. "Yet you chose the Dark Mark," Harry said. "Why was that?"</p><p>"The Aegis is…demanding," Tom said, his lips twisting. "I would only have chosen to bestow it on a single person, not a whole army. Thus, the honor shall go to you."</p><p>"I'm flattered," Harry deadpanned, pulling his wrist back in annoyance. "I'm not going to be one of your little Death Eaters, Tom. The Aegis is already completed. It can't be transferred anymore."</p><p>Tom huffed a laugh. "Perhaps. But do you think you'll be safe with him, <em>loved</em> by him? I'd protect you above all others. Harry, surely, you understand the value of being protected. No more hurt, no more pain, just simply <em>love</em>."</p><p>"Severus can give me that," Harry insisted stubbornly. "I don't need you."</p><p>"Can he?" Tom asked, arching an eyebrow. "I was unaware that Severus was capable of love. Whereas I am all the love Voldemort was ever capable of, humbly willing to give you all that you need. Severus only takes. He took what he wanted from you tonight, didn't he? I know you, Harry, you'll blame the Aegis, say it wasn't really him. Yet, your mind knows the truth. You've equated him with those aurors already. McCalister, Moody, Jaggers, and now…<em>Severus Snape</em>."</p><p>Harry shook his head in denial.</p><p>Tom only sighed. "I would never force you to do <em>anything</em> with me, Harry. I've only ever been honest with you. I know you better than Severus does, more than even Ron or Hermione, whom Severus <em>killed</em>."</p><p>"Ron was hit by the killing curse," Harry said.</p><p>"And I suppose Hermione poisoned herself?" Tom asked, arching his brow.</p><p>Harry looked away, hating the gloating look in Tom's eyes. He could only too easily imagine Severus bent over a steaming cauldron, brewing the very poison that took Hermione from him…he shuddered as he remembered the dullness in her eyes.</p><p>"I'm only looking out for your best interests, Harry. I know you're in pain right now and that Severus was far from gentle tonight. You will only continue to get hurt if you place your trust in him. Look at Dumbledore. He trusted Severus and now he's dead, killed by his wand. Look at you. You trusted his patronus, and now you're chained for life to him and in the Dark Lord's prison."</p><p>Harry was silent, his jaw stubbornly set. Tom could tell he wasn't getting through to him. He sighed dramatically, as if to pull out his trump card. "Ask Severus what happened to the Healer."</p><p>"Nothing happened to her."</p><p>"Oh, is that what he told you?"</p><p>"You're a liar, Tom Riddle."</p><p>"So is he!" Tom yelled, leaping to his feet. "Harry can't you see? You can't think straight because of the bond."</p><p>"He confounded her. That was all!" Harry shouted.</p><p>"He made her break her vow!"</p><p>
  <em>"Then she shouldn't have taken it!"</em>
</p><p>Tom stopped in his tracks. He had originally intended to get Harry back on his side by sending him off on a quest that would surely open his eyes. But now…his gaze was nothing short of predatory, filled with desire and lust.</p><p>Harry balked. "I didn't mean it that way."</p><p>"Oh yes, yes you did." Tom was positively beaming at him. "Imagine, if Severus could have you this well trained in seven months, just what will you be saying a year from now? That Voldemort actually loved your parents and it was a tea party gone wrong that night in Godric's Hollow?"</p><p>"I'm done with you," Harry growled. "Let me out!"</p><p>Tom pouted. "Well, all you had to do was ask."</p><p>And the world dissolved again…</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Forgiveness</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Harry forgives.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry winced as the pain returned to him. <em>Fuck</em>.</p><p>He hadn't actually been penetrated in so long and Severus hadn't used any lubrication. He blamed the Aegis.</p><p>
  <em>I know you, Harry, you'll blame the Aegis, say it wasn't really him.</em>
</p><p><em>Shut up, Tom!</em> he thought, not knowing if Tom was near the surface or far down below. That was so like Tom, preying on the vulnerable…and who had made him vulnerable in the first place?</p><p>Harry gingerly sat up in bed. He was alone. It occurred to him then that he hadn't had a full-on nightmare in a while, that Severus woke him up dutifully each and every time, kissing away his tears and rocking him back to bed in the most un-Snapeish way. He had to believe his actions last night were due to the bond, it simply wasn't him. But did that make it better?</p><p>
  <em>McCalister, Moody, Jaggers, and now…Severus Snape.</em>
</p><p>Harry rather thought Tom had missed a few names in the long list of people who had fucked him up. <em>Voldemort, Tom Riddle, Albus Dumbledore, the Dursleys, Umbridge…</em></p><p>Despite everything that had happened, Harry wanted nothing more than to crawl in Severus' arms and just lay there, his fingers carding through Harry's hair. Being wrapped in strong arms, not quite a hug, but a life preserver. He wanted to be held securely and taken to the surface, far from the bottom of the frozen pool, far from this abyss.</p><p>Yet, his heart hurt. Aegis or not…how could it have gone so wrong? Severus was nothing if not made of self-control. How could he think the only way to complete the bond was through violence? He'd offered plenty of times, willingly, and had been summarily refused.</p><p>His head hurt too. He wished it weren't all so complicated and confusing. Not for the first time, Harry stared at the silver mark on his wrist, ironically placed next to the silver chains, and cursed Dumbledore for his parting gift…</p><p>The early morning rays streamed in from the window, illuminating the small dresser across from the bed. It took Harry a while to get up, but when he did, it was rather hard to miss the array of items arranged on the dresser's surface. There were three vials of different colored potions, each labeled in the Prince's script. <em>Healing Potion, Dreamless Sleep, Calming Draught. </em>He took no time to whip off the cap of the healing potion and drink two large gulps, feeling the aches and pains tingle and fade. Was this to be his apology then? Not even in person, just a…gift basket? He wished he had Dreamless Sleep earlier, as it wasn't going to do him any good now that he was awake, unless…was Severus not going to sleep beside him anymore? The thought chilled him more than it should have.</p><p>Next to the three potions were more vials, but smaller, with white silvery fluid in them, and beside them, a familiar stone basin. He looked around for a note, knowing there likely wasn't one as he searched behind and below the dresser. Severus had nearly skinned him alive the last time he went into his pensieve and he had mentally vowed to himself that he wouldn't dare go near such a thing again. And yet, here it was.</p><p>Harry's hand shook as he took the memories and poured them into the pensieve, one by one.</p><p>He took a deep breath and dove.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>He spotted Snape immediately, albeit a much younger Snape, dressed in black robes as per usual, creeping along the hallway and stopping outside a certain door. Presently, Harry heard the voices of Trelawney and Dumbledore floating from the room of the Hog's Head Inn.</p><p>It wasn't new information to Harry who already knew it had been Severus who ultimately gave the prophecy to Voldemort…but Snape didn't know that he knew. To him, this was the equivalent of an earthquake, ripping off Harry's blindfold and jolting him into reality.</p><p>
  <em>A confession: I killed your parents.</em>
</p><p>Maybe, if Harry hadn't known, he might have agreed. But Harry understood that Severus at that time had been a young Death Eater, eager to please his lord and move up the ranks, and perhaps surpass even the great Lucius Malfoy…No, instead, Harry focused on the other details in the memory.</p><p>Like the way there was an apparent lack of privacy around the room, no silencing spell in place at all. Or the way he knew the Dumbledore had the capability of being aware of Severus' magical signature hovering just outside the room, but didn't interfere…did Severus want him to sympathize with him? Make him understand that he was only twisted because of Dumbledore's machinations? In that case, he was preaching to the choir. But somehow, Harry didn't think so. The memory reeked of self-loathing and guilt. There was no plea, least of all to Harry, that anyone should forgive him.</p><p>In fact, it was rather like a plea for Harry to damn him forever…</p><p>The next memory was much more recent.</p><p>It was him as he was now. Bruises of various colors, in various stages of healing. It seemed he had just been given over to Severus' care, fresh from the throne room of Riddle Manor. Severus had placed him on the bed that would soon become his bed, before he moved into Severus' own room. Somehow, he couldn't remember this scene as Severus forced healing potions down his throat, rubbing his back as Harry murmured incoherently, in a state between being awake and asleep. A superposition of sorts between dead and alive…</p><p>Harry watched Snape's face now. It was hard and detached, devoid of the warmth Harry had been privy to in recent months. Then, Severus pointed his wand at Harry's temple. <em>"Legilimens!"</em></p><p>It only took a second for the potions master to be blasted back, onto the floor. The look on his face was one of pure incredulousness. When had the brat learned Occlumency? He tried two more times to the same result, his eyes flashing in anger. Finally, Severus pointed his wand between Harry's eyes.</p><p>"<em>Imperio!</em>"</p><p>Harry couldn't guess what Severus was thinking in that moment as Harry's body went lax, his eyes slowly opening under the spell. He watched as past-Harry and Severus walked to the edge of the wards, and then he too was taken along for the ride as they arrived at Hogwarts, just beyond the front gate. Nothing much was said between them, considering Harry was in no state to hold a conversation and Severus didn't need to talk to himself to know what he was thinking…He followed them to the girl's bathroom, Myrtle thankfully away on some mischief, and down into the chamber of secrets…</p><p>When they passed the basilisk, Severus couldn't help the surprise that flitted over his face. No doubt thinking how a child could have ever survived <em>that</em>, but then he refocused on the task at hand.</p><p>"Find me Slytherin's study," he snapped at Harry.</p><p>That's when Harry first noticed that something was off. The way past-Harry moved was too smooth, not jerky like it usually was under the imperius. Harry tailed past-Harry closely as he strode towards the mouth of Salazar Slytherin.</p><p><em>"Great Salazar, I seek your wisdom!"</em> But Severus could only hear a series of hisses.</p><p>Past-Harry walked confidently into the secret rooms of one of Hogwarts' founders, picking his way carefully towards a single book on the shelf. How had he known what to look for? Harry hadn't heard Snape say anything, though it was true the command could have been in his head.</p><p>Severus clasped the book that past-Harry handed to him, flipping through the pages with a deep frown. Of course, it was in parselscript. While he was studying the book, he missed the look that ghosted over past-Harry's face just for a second, a look that was decidedly Tom Riddle.</p><p>What had Tom been doing giving Severus that book? Did he know that the Aegis was contained in it? It was likely Tom had even read the book himself as a student before developing the Dark Mark. Hadn't he confessed as much?</p><p>Harry's blood ran cold as he realized the implications of that. Tom had <em>wanted</em> Severus to learn about the Aegis. Tom had <em>wanted</em> Harry to complete the bond with Snape. But didn't he know that breaking the Aegis would require Voldemort to die?</p><p>Harry thought that this was perhaps what Tom had been aiming for all along. He remembered Tom describing his duel existence as both Voldemort and himself as two predators circling each other, that Voldemort wanted to absorb him to eliminate the threat he posed. What if Tom also had a plan in place to ensure his survival and independence? With Voldemort gone, the Aegis between Severus and Harry would dissolve, and with Tom removed from Harry…what was to stop Tom from invoking the Aegis with Harry himself?</p><p>This was all missed by Severus though, who sighed and shrunk the book, slipping it into his cloak pocket. when they arrived back at the house, Severus released Harry from the curse, obliviated him without any qualms, and tucked him into bed…</p><p>Harry had a feeling he knew what was coming even before the third memory solidified around him. It was the day the Healer came.</p><p>He watched as Severus paced back and forth on the first floor, never mind that he was freely bleeding. It was clear that having Harry alone with that woman agitated him. A few times, Severus glanced at the door as if tempted to barge in, but he stopped himself. He would be patient, show Harry that he trusted him…Severus was taken by surprise when past-Harry seemed to fall all over him, insisting that the Healer treat his wounds right then and there. The Healer had seemed unhappy to Harry, but from Snape's perspective, she seemed downright disgusted.</p><p>Harry watched as Severus basked in the affection past-Harry was showering on him. It was clear that something had changed in the way he regarded Harry, but was it for the better? Severus' eyes narrowed in suspicion when the Healer looked between them like someone had just died.</p><p><em>"Allow me to escort you to the edge of the wards…" </em>Severus said.</p><p>Harry followed Severus and the Healer outside, already anticipating the outcome. <em>See Tom?</em> he wanted to say, <em>Severus does trust me. I didn't even have to ask him what happened and he told me…</em></p><p>But he knew Tom would only laugh in his face. <em>No, you only had to be raped by him. What a shining beacon of mutual trust…</em></p><p>Harry watched as the Healer and Severus argued back and forth. He even recognized the crazed look in Severus' eyes as he dragged the Healer back behind the wards and mercilessly assaulted her mind. Thoughts whizzed past his own, little snippets of the Healer's own knowledge about the Aegis, the worlds splitting asunder, the bond needing to be fed, intermingled with Severus' feelings of finally being able <em>to belong, to have, to possess</em>. He could even feel the woman's life force fading around them and Severus' apathy to her fate as he drained what information he could from her…He watched Severus dispose of the body coldly, before walking right back into the house and having the gall to say she was only <em>confounded</em>, coaxing Harry expertly towards his own confession.</p><p>And then Harry was rising to the surface…</p><p><em>Self-flagellation, self-loathing, repentance…</em>he could taste it on his tongue. Harry looked sadly down at the memories swirling in the basin. Severus Snape was steeped in a cycle of remorse and pain. It was only natural he was gravitating towards renewing that toxic cycle with Harry. With Dumbledore around no longer to twist his guilt and channel it for the Greater Good, Harry understood then that Severus wanted him to fill that role, most likely subconsciously.</p><p>Harry shook his head. Didn't Severus understand that Harry…that Harry <em>loved</em> him?</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Severus spent his day in the basement, changing the wards so that no one would disturb him. He had left the boy with his sins, well, his most recent sins. If the boy had any brain cells at all, he would realize he would want nothing to do with him, that indeed, it would be healthier even to actually play at jailed and jailor. At least then, Harry could fight against him, knowing that everything Snape gave him was wrong, instead of this…whatever it was that was between them. Voldemort had given Harry to Severus to break. It was nothing short of madness that Severus felt like he were the one sentenced to fall apart. And who had sentenced him? Voldemort? Harry? Albus? Perhaps, it was himself.</p><p>The silver mark rested on his skin, as innocuous as you please. He had tried several glamour charms, but none of them would hide it completely. Short of cutting off his arm, he was sure the ancient magic would have its way, and even then, he wondered if it wouldn't just appear somewhere else…</p><p>The bond itself wasn't dark. At least, the Healer hadn't thought so. It was a protection bond, one for lovers, which disgusted Severus to no end to know that Albus have invoked it with a minor, but then again…Albus had more self-control than Severus. Albus had never completed the bond, had left it wide open. So wide open, in fact, that the blasted thing latched onto him, deeming him Harry's most suitable protector! Well, it wasn't wrong. He had been protecting that brat since before he knew who Severus was! It was only fitting that magic recognized his claim.</p><p>He continued to crush the dried dandelion root into a fine powder. <em>I said, Severus, that there was nothing wrong with offering Harry physical affection. A hug here or there won't kill you. But you must not, under any circumstances, use him to satisfy your needs, no matter how good it makes you feel. Are we clear?</em></p><p>With a twist of his lips, Severus understood. The bastard had known all along. Had known exactly why Harry had suddenly turned into his personal assistant, craving his touch and fixing his drinks, when the inclination had never manifested itself before. <em>Get close to Harry, but not too close—</em>well, that was rather a moot point now, wasn't it?</p><p>If Albus had just shared his secrets instead of leaving his minions to grope in the dark, leaving them to stumble their way through the darkness, trusting them not to harm themselves or each other, trusting them, in other words, to be better people than they were…perhaps this could have all been avoided.</p><p>Last night, Severus had acted like a man possessed. His very nature warred against what he had become. It was only after climaxing, spilling his seed inside of Harry, that his mind had become clear. The monster known as the Aegis had purred in his chest, receding in his mind after taking what it wanted.</p><p>You couldn't feed sacrificial bonds like these piecemeal, and that's exactly what Harry had been doing with Severus none the wiser. Even the wards around Number 4 Privet Drive operated on such rudimentary inputs as pain and sacrifice. The Aegis was no different.</p><p>He knew the exact instant that Harry had left the pensieve. Knew when the boy had found his way outside the basement door, hovering like a moth around a flickering lamppost…Throughout it all, Severus continued to brew. He had to get them out of here before he lost what little sanity he had.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>It wasn't until well after midnight that Severus finally emerged from the basement—mistakenly deeming it would be safe to do so—and was immediately set upon by Harry who leapt up from the couch.</p><p><em>And so it ends</em>, Severus thought, steeling himself. <em>Well, at least, let it end with a bang.</em></p><p>Harry's eyes were blazing. "It didn't work, you know," Harry said confidently. "You won't manipulate me into hating you, Severus."</p><p>"Then you're a fool," Severus said tonelessly. "There is no manipulation if it is deserved. You viewed my memories. Now make your judgment."</p><p>Harry gaped at him, his jaw working up and down. "Is this what you think this is? I'm not Dumbledore. I asked you to complete the bond with me and you did. I pushed for it. I'm not going to use your own guilt against you. I'm not a monster. I'm not <em>him</em>."</p><p>"So I suppose you had no need for a healing potion this morning?"</p><p>"Of course I did. You <em>hurt</em> me."</p><p>"Then frankly, Harry, I fail to see the confusion. I killed your parents. I nearly killed you! I cast an unforgiveable on you and then obliviated you afterwards. I killed the Healer! I <em>raped</em> you. You were a virgin…"</p><p>"Actually," Harry said forcefully, taking a step forward so that he was pressed chest-to-chest with Severus. "I haven't been a virgin in a long time. Dumbledore made sure of that."</p><p>Severus stumbled many steps back, his face paling rapidly. "Dumbledore, he, he…"</p><p>"No, Merlin no!" Harry spat in disgust. "He just gave me to people who did. It happened right before my fifth year. I pleaded with him to make it end, but he only sent me back. I only recovered my memories recently…"</p><p>There was clearly a lot to unpack there. Severus tucked that away for later, focusing on the task at hand. He needed to convince him, needed him to understand why this couldn't go on, why it was against everything that made sense. "Then you should know I'm not good for you."</p><p>"Doesn't matter!" Harry laughed, rubbing his wrist absently. "We're bound, you and I. If you think, Severus, that a few lies and unforgiveables are enough to for me lose you, then you're sorely mistaken."</p><p>And then the boy said the most damnable thing of all. Said it like a malediction, like a curse. "I forgive you, Severus."</p><p>"You can't possibly forgive me!" Severus protested. "Some things are unforgiveable no matter what the circumstances. And any protest to the contrary is denial masquerading as mercy."</p><p>Harry's eyes hardened. "You and I both know that there is no such thing as mercy. I forgive you, for everything I know about and everything I don't know about, because I trust you."</p><p>"And yet, you keep secrets from me," Severus said bitterly. "Like Draco, like the Aegis…"</p><p>"No more than you keep from me," Harry returned. "You killed that Healer. He brought me to Hogwarts under the imperius. Need we go on and on? We'd be at this for hours, back and forth, and…quite honestly, I just want us to go to bed."</p><p>It took a second for Severus to understand the implications. He looked at Harry with a slight shake of his head. "I can't trust myself around you, Harry. Look what I did…"</p><p>"So you would have me punished for it by subjecting me to nightmares and visions?"</p><p>"I made you Dreamless Sleep, if you do recall."</p><p>"It isn't the same! Look, Severus, we both know you weren't fully yourself yesterday. Make it up to me, please? Sleep with me, hold me, you can sleep on the very edge of the bed if you want to. But if we don't want a repeat of last night, we both need to work together to keep the bond happy."</p><p>It almost seemed like Severus had seen a basilisk. He was so still, his back rigid, his face set in stone. Harry nearly opened his mouth to plead some more, when Severus finally relented with the softest of words.</p><p>"…Alright…"</p><p>Not waiting for Severus to change his mind, Harry took his hand firmly and led him up the stairs.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>When it was time for Severus to cast <em>nox</em>, he found that he did indeed miss having Harry in his arms. The boy fell to sleep within minutes, having not gotten enough the night before.</p><p>Severus was not so lucky. His mind was alive and alert, going through each and every scenario of how it would all end, none of them good. His soul was heavy. He brushed Harry's hair out of his eyes. Was it the Aegis that made him tremble, racked with want and need and guilt? Or was that Severus' own heart beating loud enough to wake the dead?</p><p>Who was forgiveness really for? he mused. The giver or the receiver? Harry might have felt like he forgave him, but Severus still felt trapped. It wasn't enough…</p><p>In about a week, it would be Harry's birthday, he knew. Born as the seventh month dies… He would need to do something special. A gift, an apology, a perhaps desperate act of sheer stupidity.</p><p>His thoughts drifted and landed on a single gift. He wondered if, ironically enough, it would make Harry hate him more than ever, even when all he wanted to do was make the boy smile. It wouldn't be safe. No, it would be terribly unsafe. And stupid. But perhaps the risk would be just what they both needed to get out of this alive, before the Aegis or the Dark Lord consumed them all.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Tis the season for gift giving...Hmm, wonder what Severus is thinking of...</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. A Gift</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus retrieves a gift.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I am curious, Severus. Why did you send Draco home to me? Was he not satisfactory?" Voldemort paced the front of the throne room in Riddle Manor, Draco, kneeling with his forehead on the ground some ways away. The boy's pale, naked body shivered in the torchlight.</p><p>"It is not that," Severus hastily dismissed. "It is that I no longer require him, my lord. I have reached the next phase of my plan."</p><p>"Oh?" Voldemort stopped his pacing and looked up. "And what is that?"</p><p>"To bring the mudblood."</p><p>Severus held his breath. The Dark Lord was intrigued, he could tell, but that might not necessarily be a good thing.</p><p>"I see…" His red eyes pierced Severus' and Severus could feel a light probing at his occlumency shields. Not enough to break them, but enough to be a suggestion, a hint… "I <em>trust</em> your judgment, Severus. It is an art, is it not? To feel for the ones we break, to have them feel for us in turn, to twist them, to make them ours and not to succumb to the very same?"</p><p>"My lord?"</p><p>"I do not wish to deny you, but you must first show me proof of your progress."</p><p>Severus nodded, having expected something like this. With far less regret than Harry might have believed, he allowed the Dark Lord into his mind, ferrying him to the one vision he knew would grant him his wish. It was the night of the claiming.</p><p>Voldemort seized eagerly onto the memory, practically salivating over his prize. Severus could feel Voldemort's presence in his mind, <em>voyeuristic, parasitic…hungry</em>, taking in the way Severus breached Harry over and over, tearing him apart with little mercy. He could imagine that he thought with each thrust, the boy broke just a little bit more, pushing him further and further into the Dark Lord's waiting arms. It was a perfect manipulation.</p><p>Perfect in that Severus had played the role perfectly. He <em>had</em> been cruel to the boy. He had hurt him more than the rest of the inner circle combined. He swiftly clamped down on his emotions and allowed the Dark Lord to look his fill. He couldn't allow himself to feel weakness, not now.</p><p>What he didn't expect was for the Dark Lord himself to become aroused in Severus' own mindscape. The idea was so disturbing that Severus nearly pushed him out, but he stopped himself in time. He <em>needed</em> Granger. He owed it to Harry to endure. So he stood there passively as the Dark Lord's breathing became ragged, his own heady magic swirling around him as he finally climaxed, a dark inky fluid spurting from his cock…</p><p>Then Severus was looking into the Dark Lord's triumphant scarlet eyes, as if he knew how violated Severus had just felt then and knew that Severus wouldn't dare complain. The other memories had been constructs and illusions. This one had been all too real and all too raw. Voldemort smiled knowingly, just as he had when he played along and sent a Healer to the house, as if he were pleased that Severus was defying him just a little, as long as he knew he could not be tricked.</p><p>"You have done well, Severus," he finally spoke, returning to his throne. "So well, in fact, that I wonder if you'll have any problems when it is time to hand the boy to me."</p><p>"He is yours, my lord. I have no desire for the boy."</p><p>"Such lies…"</p><p>Severus stilled. He began to calculate his odds of tearing a small hole in the anti-apparation wards, escaping to the house to retrieve Harry, and…running forever. The potions were not yet done. The chains on Harry's wrist were still active. They were already dead. It was just a matter of when.</p><p>Then the Dark Lord threw his head back and laughed, not a wraithlike hiss, but an actual laugh. Draco tensed as his spidery hands came to settle on his neck, as if the gesture would be considered comforting when all Draco did was shudder.</p><p>"I should have better foreseen how <em>lovely</em> my Harry would be for you. After all, I was unable to spare the mother. Why would you not covet her son? I am an understanding and merciful lord. I have sent you a Healer, have I not? One who has gone missing, I am told…but they are just rumors." The Dark Lord cocked his head to the side, his wand twirling between his fingers. "I owe you much, Severus Snape. For the potion you will brew that will spare Harry and bring my soul back to me, for finding my Unintended, and for breaking him so beautifully. When your year is up, I shall allow you to stay and keep him company while I am gone. Harry shall be my equal, but why should he not have a companion at his side?"</p><p>Severus' world halted momentarily. He lifted his head up, surprise flickering in his eyes. "If I may ask, my lord, why…?"</p><p>"Because it is clear that you have devoted yourself to the boy. I know of the vow you gave to that bumbling fool, Dumbledore, to protect him. I know that his body felt like a homecoming for you, that you would never give him up. Rather, someone of your wit and cunning would steal him from me. Is not that right, Severus? You would have seen my deadline as your own deadline to free him and take him for your own, but why? Why run when you could be safe and <em>cherished</em> for your talents beside the co-ruler of the new world? I would much rather you put your devotion to good use. Become my Harry's bodyguard, his shadow, his companion. I shall not interfere. He will know by that time that he is mine."</p><p>It sounded so frightfully wonderful, like all his prayers had been answered by that smooth voice. That was why he had followed the Dark Lord in the first place, wasn't it? To be valued for once, to be safe and protected, to wield power the way Lucius had by his birthright, to be seen in a way Dumbledore only saw his precious Gryffindors…He allowed the feeling to sweep him up, the better to construct a more genuine mask, as he dipped his head once more.</p><p>"Of course, I would be honored…" But inside, he was vehemently denying it. He knew the words were poison, that the Dark Lord did not keep promises. Lily had <em>died</em>…He cleared his throat. "The mudblood, my lord?"</p><p>Voldemort smiled, revealing gleaming white teeth. "Permission granted."</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>The dungeons at Riddle Manor were more extensive than the ones at Malfoy Manor. Malfoy Manor was a home, first and foremost. Riddle Manor was a fortress, built as the Dark Lord's base of operations.</p><p>Severus slipped from the room, unable to meet Draco's questioning eyes, and swiftly made his way to the lower level, his black robes snapping about his heels. Had the Dark Lord accessed more memories or sentiments than he had thought? Or was he simply grasping at straws? Surely, it was a common enough problem for people to betray him, and Severus' possessive claims as he took Harry that night did suggest Severus might want him for himself. It didn't mean that the Dark Lord <em>knew</em> what he had planned with Narcissa. It just meant he suspected enough to provide Severus an advantageous alternative.</p><p>Severus was a Slytherin, after all. He'd be a fool not to consider it.</p><p>He shook his head. The Dark Lord always lied…but then again, so had Albus. If he had to keep Harry safe, did it matter to which master he bowed his head as long as Harry was alive and relatively happy…and with him?</p><p>Silent as a mouse, Severus walked down the stone corridor, passing emaciated, huddled bodies, all crying beneath silencing charms to be released. He had no idea how many prisoners the Dark Lord kept personally and how many ended up in Azkaban, whether they were political dissenters or simply unlucky relatives of the resistance. Frankly, Severus didn't care to know. This was war.</p><p>He hurried past them, unwilling to admit that he feared he would recognize a face of a colleague or an acquaintance. All he needed to do was get to the end of the hall and turn right, where the Dark Lord's most valuable prisoners were being held, each in their own private cells with opaque walls, magic suppressing cuffs on that were heavy and crude and bit into their skin.</p><p>Severus reached the correct cell and unlocked the door. Inside the room was a girl on a bed, face up, and dressed in dirty rags. Severus had not so much insisted on the antidote to the Draught of Living Death not being administered, as people in the Dark Lord's fold were helplessly incompetent when it came to potions. Whoever had prisoner duty that day, likely MacNair, had simply thrown her into the cell and cast the spells to keep her there. She had already been interrogated at Malfoy Manor to give up everything that she knew, which apparently wasn't much, as the Dark Lord was already fully aware of their horcrux hunt around the nation, so there had been no need to revive her again.</p><p>Which was probably for the best.</p><p>Severus reached into his cloak pocket and pulled out a small vial. He popped the cork, the sound louder than it should have been in the small room. Carefully, he poured the cold potion into her mouth, keeping a hand underneath her head to keep her from choking. In the few seconds he knew it would take for the potion to work, Severus retreated to the opposite end of the room, which was not admittedly far at all, and waited.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Hermione Granger felt like there was sand in her eyes. In fact, they were leftover salt crystals from tears that had long since dried, but she didn't think of that now. Her memories came rushing at her from far away.</p><p>
  <em>They had been captured in the Forest of Dean…Bellatrix had taken a knife to her as Ron screamed from the cellar of Malfoy Manor…the locket had been taken from them. Harry had been removed from the cellar long before Ron and Hermione had been allowed to see the light of day again. Meeting Lucius Malfoy, his expression one of disdain as he allowed them into the guestroom where Harry was staying…then Snape pouring the potion down her throat when Harry refused to break.</em>
</p><p>A thousand questions shot through her mind, but there was a time and place for everything. Her instincts told her that she was not alone. As if in answer, the spell holding her to the bed undid itself and vanished, allowing her to slowly sit up on the threadbare mattress. She took her time, the blood beginning to return to her limbs. She raised her eyes and stared straight into the obsidian eyes of Severus Snape.</p><p>He watched her warily, his wand at the ready, but he did not speak. Finally, Hermione broke the silence between them.</p><p>"I'm alive," she stated, her voice full of conviction, even if it was hoarse from underuse.</p><p>"Five points to Gryffindor, Miss Granger, for that brilliant deduction."</p><p>She didn't rise to the bait, knowing that at any moment, he could put her under again. She would have to choose her battles wisely. "What happened?" she asked.</p><p>Severus pushed himself from the wall and began to pace the room, keeping her always in the corner of his eye. "Mr. Weasley was hit with the killing curse…Harry was given to me."</p><p>There was a long stretch of silence. Hermione was trying and failing to hold herself together. Her entire body shook as if she couldn't help it. She likely couldn't. Thankfully, she found her voice again and spared Severus the humiliation of having to comfort her.</p><p>"Why am I alive?"</p><p>Ah, good question. "Has the concept of leverage escaped your notice?"</p><p>Her eyes widened imperceptibly and she shook her head. "H-Harry wouldn't break for Malfoy. He won't break for you. I'd rather die."</p><p>"How noble of you," Severus sneered. "Has it occurred to you that I'm not interested in breaking him?"</p><p>"Why are you here then? You could have left me under the influence of that potion, but instead, you came and revived me. I know you want to see Harry broken. You've been nothing but horrid to him since you first laid eyes on him!"</p><p>Severus rolled his eyes. "A touching defense. I'll be sure to let him know, unless…" He let his voice trail off just so.</p><p>She sat up straighter, voice a little sharp. "Unless what?"</p><p>"Unless you wish to tell Harry yourself tomorrow."</p><p>Hermione gaped. She wanted nothing more than to see Harry in the flesh, to make sure he was alright and to escape the prison she was now aware of being in. But something held her back. Perhaps it was the glint in Snape's dark eyes as he surveyed her. It was as if cruelty had a home in Severus Snape and she wanted nothing to do with his plans or his schemes.</p><p>"And what do you want in return?" she asked, her chin jutting up just slightly even as her voice shook.</p><p>"In return?" Severus asked. "You assume I haven't already taken what I wanted, and that this is not simply repayment."</p><p>"Is it?" she challenged.</p><p>How was it possible for a girl to look so frail and be so strong? "Of sorts," he replied evasively, eyes still glittering. "Your answer, Miss Granger? Would you like to see Harry again?"</p><p>After a moment's hesitation, she gave him a final tight nod. "I'd like that…sir."</p><p>"Good." From within his robes he pulled out a shrunken trunk that he quickly resized. He unclasped it and laid it on the ground before her. Within was a flight of steps leading to a small room in wizarding space. The kind of trunk that Barty Crouch Jr. had used to imprison Mad-Eye Moody. She swallowed. "Get in. Or has your Gryffindor courage failed you?" he taunted.</p><p>She bristled and rose to her feet, getting ready to descend the stairs, when she hesitated. "I'd just like to know one more thing, sir. How long was I out? What day is it?"</p><p>"July 30th."</p><p>Her head whipped up to stare at him in unadulterated surprise. "Tomorrow is Harry's birthday," she blurted out, eyeing Severus anew. The idea that formed there was palpable, hovering in the still dungeon air, and Severus cursed her for her perception.</p><p>"So it is," he said blandly and jabbed his finger again towards the trunk.</p><p>Hermione straightened her back and plowed forward, as if she were marching of her own accord with her own power. She hadn't taken many steps before Severus quickly snapped the trunk shut, shrunk it, and slipped it into his pocket again.</p><p>Let her believe the worst in him. It didn't matter. She would hardly believe it if he had simply popped down to the dungeons and spilled his heart's deepest secrets at her feet, before offering her a way back to the surface. What mattered was that she would come and that her mind was still intact. Between the Aegis, the Dark Mark removing potion, and the Horcrux Extracting potion, he knew that they needed all the help they could get. And indeed, he did believe that Harry was withholding something from him about the Aegis that maybe he would be willing to tell a familiar face, as much as that irked him personally. Yes, she would be a gift for Harry…an apology, as heartfelt as he had ever given one…but he was not above emotional manipulation to save their hides.</p><p>He strode to the edge of Riddle Manor's anti-apparation wards, flicked his wand, and vanished with a pop.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Apologies</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Hermione stays.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry woke up in bed alone. His arse was sore, but a good kind of sore, as he reached over to the bedside table and plucked the pain potion sitting there for him. They had decided on this course of action fairly quickly, having regular sex to keep the Aegis from overpowering them. It was admittedly Harry's idea, but it wasn't like Severus had been protesting, Harry smiled smugly to himself.</p><p>The Aegis was now fully active on both their ends now and it was worrying Severus more than it was worrying Harry. Perhaps because the bond only wanted Harry to submit, and each day, that request became just a little bit louder. Now, he wanted to <em>kneel</em> at Severus' feet during meals and leapt at every opportunity to brush his lips against his cheek or hand or lips… It had reached a point where it had become impossible for Severus to get any brewing done and he had needed to banish him from the basement. Now with regular sex, those urges were more manageable. Severus refused to be as open about what the bond wanted him to do or when those urges came about…but Harry could guess.</p><p>Walking down the stairs, Harry was surprised to see the man already at the table, breakfast made and arrayed. He quirked his eyebrow at the man when he saw what was on the menu for the day. Waffles with blueberries and syrup? He looked from Severus back to the food. It was his favorite, of course, but he knew Severus didn't have quite the same sweet tooth as he did.</p><p>"What's all this for?" Harry asked as casually as he could, after fixing Severus his morning coffee and setting it in front of the man. Harry then walked around to his own seat with his tea, putting effort into sitting in the chair beside Severus and not on the floor. <em>But it'll be so comfortable, </em>the Aegis had crooned.</p><p>"It is your favorite, is it not?"</p><p>"Well, yes. Mrs. Weasley always made it for me when I came over. But why? It's not like you like all this sugar in the morning. You take your coffee black."</p><p>Severus smiled, but he was tense, Harry could tell. "It is your birthday, Harry."</p><p>"Oh." Time just seemed to pass at the house. He wasn't allowed newspapers and Severus hardly kept a calendar pinned to the wall. "Thank you, Severus." He leaned over and pecked the man on the cheek without thinking, the gesture not even out of the ordinary anymore. "It smells delicious."</p><p>Severus smiled, pleased with himself…and nervous. Harry wondered about the nervousness but let it be. He would find out soon enough. It was when he stood up to begin clearing away the table that Severus raised a hand to stop him. "I shall take care of that today. Come, it is time to open your present."</p><p>When he spoke, his voice shook. "You got me a present?"</p><p>Not for the first time, Severus cursed the Dursleys for handing the wizarding world such a vulnerable savior. One only had to give the boy the slightest things and he was theirs. "I did," Severus nodded. "Right through here."</p><p>He led Harry into one of the sitting rooms he had locked and warded before Harry had risen, praying that Granger had kept her word and had not tried to destroy the room or attempt to escape. They stopped right outside the door. Now or never.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>True to her word, Hermione Granger was sitting in one of the chairs, dressed in fine robes (courtesy of Narcissa whom Severus had no choice but to contact), fiddling nervously with her fingers. Harry took one step into the room and froze.</p><p>"H-how…?" his question was directed at Severus, but he couldn't tear his eyes from his friend.</p><p>"Draught of Living Death," Severus murmured, his breath ghosting over the shell of Harry's ear. "Happy birthday. I shall see you both at dinner." Then Severus left the room with a curt nod at Granger who was looking between them intently. She didn't move until the door was fully shut, and then she bounded across the room and enveloped Harry in a tight, warm hug, crushing his lungs like she would never see him again.</p><p>"Oh, Harry!" she cried, her entire body shaking with the release of so much worry and anxiety and pain…</p><p>Harry was frozen for a second, his face one of utter shock. Tom had seemed so confident when he said that Hermione had died, that Snape had killed her…but then, Tom didn't know everything did he? Or was this just another lie? He breathed in deeply, holding her close, returning the hug. His heart rejoiced with a single thought, that Severus had not killed Hermione…he had saved her.</p><p>They pulled away, sitting close together on the couch. She eyed the silver bracelets on his wrists and Harry couldn't help noticing her own thick cuffs. Harry cleared his throat, his voice thick with emotion as he thought of Ron and how the golden trio would never be together again.</p><p>"Hermione, I'm so, so sorry I couldn't get you both out of here. I couldn't, believe me, I wanted give in to so badly! I'm so sorry…"</p><p>"Shhh, Harry, it's alright. Shhh. Of course you couldn't give in to Voldemort. It's not your fault… Shhh…"</p><p>And back and forth they went for a good ten minutes, the hysteria slowly giving way to more pressing, current matters. Like the fact that salvation was still at the bottom of the abyss, that they were still imprisoned, if alive. Who knew how long they would have with each other? Surely Severus knew that Harry would fight tooth and nail to keep Hermione close to him. He couldn't send her back to the dungeons, not now, not when he knew she was alive.</p><p>"I had no idea that Severus did that…" Harry murmured. "He didn't let on at all. I thought you had <em>died</em>."</p><p>"I know, Harry. Believe me, I was just as surprised…" Hermione twisted her lips, unsure how to broach the subject that was nagging her. It had not escaped her notice that they were on a first name basis now, but what she wanted to know was why and how. "I told him I wouldn't be used by him to manipulate you," though she might very well be failing miserably for all she knew, "but instead he acted like he wasn't trying to get something from you and implied he had already, well, <em>taken</em> what he wanted, and that I was to be the repayment <em>of sorts</em>."</p><p>Harry bit his lip nervously, knowing it had to come out sometime, but feeling anxious about revealing he had known for quite a while, well before his capture, about the bond.</p><p>"Harry," Hermione began gently. "What did he mean by that?...Harry?"</p><p>"It's an apology."</p><p>"What did he do to you?" she whispered.</p><p>Harry met her gaze and slowly held out his wrist. He refused to form the words of that night, of the assault. <em>Of the rape</em>, Tom would have said gleefully. She already thought the worst of Severus, and right now he needed them both. Perhaps selfishly, he misdirected her inquiries.</p><p>"It's a bonding mark…" Her brown eyes widened. "Did he make you—"</p><p>"It's from Dumbledore…" Harry began, making her head snap up. "When he died, somehow, the bond er, latched onto Severus."</p><p>"But it's completed," she said slowly, "you can tell by the border around it and you never had this at Hogwarts, I would have noticed…Which means that it's the kind of bond that transitions, otherwise Dumbledore wouldn't have thought to use it without completing it."</p><p>Harry looked at her bewildered. "When did you become such an expert on bonds, Hermione?"</p><p>"Ron and I were looking into them, before…" She shook her head sharply, cutting off any further tears. "Do you remember the book they wouldn't give me in Dumbledore's Will?"</p><p>"The Latin one?"</p><p>"Yes, <em>Vincula</em>. It was on bonding and I just assumed it was because he knew R-Ron and I were going to get married. But now…I think he must have known the bond could have transferred to someone else before he died."</p><p>Something ugly twisted in Harry's gut, eerily close to betrayal. "I see…"</p><p>"I'm sure Dumbledore never dreamed that it would bond you to Snape of all people." He couldn't stand the pity in her eyes. She didn't understand what it was like.</p><p>"I don't mind it really…" Harry said, absently rubbing at the mark "There are worse things than being bonded to Severus…and we had no choice, Hermione. Voldemort gave Severus a year to break me. I haven't been able to leave this house once and just being around him all the time made it hard to ignore. I all bet begged him to complete the bond with me." He looked away, unable to meet her eyes. "He didn't force me."</p><p>"The bond has compulsions?" Hermione asked in alarm. "But you said Dumbledore invoked it with you. He would never use a bond that was dark!"</p><p>"Well…it's more like suggestions," Harry said evasively. Which wasn't a complete lie. "Like wanting to make Severus happy, I suppose. It's not bad, not when we properly manage it, and honestly, I think Severus is more upset about it than I am. He doesn't like losing control, you know. And I practically forced him to complete the bond with me when it was clear he would never touch me like that."</p><p><em>Like that</em>. There were few ways that bonds demanded to be completed. Sex was one of those ways, reserved usually for bonds between lovers, as she hoped hers would have been with Ron.</p><p>"You slept together." It wasn't a question.</p><p>Harry dipped his head.</p><p>"And now he wants to apologize to you?"</p><p>Again, another tentative nod.</p><p>"I'll <em>kill </em>him!"</p><p>"No, Hermione, don't, wait!" Harry said, more out of reflex than anything, grabbing her arms and pulling her down back onto the couch. He knew Severus could handle his own, especially now that Hermione didn't have access to her magic.</p><p>"That bastard!" Hermione screeched, "Let me go, Harry!"</p><p>"No, I begged for it! It was…good."</p><p>She stopped in her tracks as a blush stole over Harry's cheeks. Hermione shook her head uncomprehendingly. "He hurt you, Harry! Can't you see? That's why he's apologizing. He knows he shouldn't have taken advantage of you like that."</p><p>"You act like he had a choice one way or another," Harry said adamantly. "This isn't Hogwarts, Hermione. Voldemort ordered Severus to train me <em>sexually</em> and when he refused I went to Draco." He ignored her startled intake of breath and soldiered on. "And then when Lucius found out Severus wasn't fucking me, I had to let him use me too so that he'd keep his mouth shut! I <em>like</em> Severus, Hermione. I like the way he makes me feel, and the way he holds me afterwards, and the way he smiles when I bring him coffee in the morning. I-I-Hermione, I think I'm in love with him…"</p><p>Hermione froze. <em>In love</em> with Snape? Her blood ran cold as she considered the implications. A bond that had suggestions and compulsions, that needed to be completed with sex, that drew two souls together…this was what she was up against. But Hermione was intelligent and she could see that Harry thought he was in love and might even choose Snape over her. So she nodded that she understood, but what she understood was that she would wait before jumping to conclusions.</p><p>"I believe you Harry," she said kindly, reaching out to squeeze his hand affectionately.</p><p>"It's just…" Harry began and Hermione leaned in, hearing the plea in his voice, "Sometimes I think the bond scares Severus and he won't admit it. We're taking precautions so that the bond doesn't overwhelm us, but what if it does? I forgave him the last time the bond took over and he still hasn't really forgiven himself. We don't know much about it, either, but there's a book by Salazar that talks about it. It's called the Aegis bond…Please, Hermione, you're better at researching than anyone I know. Will you help with this, whatever your feelings are?"</p><p>"You know the answer is yes, Harry." She hugged him tightly around the waist. "I'll do my best to get you answers."</p><p>"Thank you."</p><p>Then their conversation turned to other things, like the potions and the plan…</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Harry and Hermione emerged from the room when the clock struck six. It was dinner time, judging from the wonderful smells wafting in from the kitchen. It made sense that Severus would be naturally talented at cooking as he was at brewing, both talents drawing from the same skill set.</p><p>Harry quickly went to sit in his chair, though he cast a longing look at the floor by the head of the table, and gestured for Hermione to come join him. But she stood ramrod straight, staring down the potions master who was rather harmlessly settling down a hot dish of chicken pot pie, another of Harry's favorites. Harry gave her a worried glance, wondering if she would confront Severus after all.</p><p>"What is it, Miss Granger?" Severus asked as politely as he could, as if he wasn't fully aware that Harry could not keep secrets from his friends, and that she now held in her mind knowledge of his crimes.</p><p>"I'm willing to help you research the Aegis bond," Hermione stated boldly. "But I'll need access to the Malfoy library…and I'll need to observe you for several days."</p><p>Severus knew that it was her way of asserting her importance and not being shoved back into the trunk right away, not that Severus had any intention of doing so—Hermione was to get the room Harry had long since vacated. He quirked a supercilious eyebrow at her.</p><p>"<em>Really?</em> I had no idea you harbored such voyeuristic tendencies, Miss Granger."</p><p>Harry blushed to the roots of his hair, but Hermione was not deterred. "I've studied bonds extensively in preparation for the day that Ron and I would be bonded. Harry's already explained your plan with Narcissa Malfoy and frankly, I think you could use all the help you can get before we run out of time."</p><p>If she thought Severus was going to protest, she was sorely mistaken. His black eyes glittered and met hers in challenge. Without taking his eyes off of her, he gently caressed the back of Harry's neck and snapped, "Down."</p><p>Without thinking, Harry immediately slid to his knees besides Severus' chair as the man himself took a seat. The Aegis had been relentlessly pushing Harry towards such behavior for the past few days and rejoiced in the sudden victory.</p><p>But then Hermione gasped audibly, ruining the moment, bringing her hands up to cover her mouth. The relief that had coursed through Harry a split second ago suddenly turned to shame and he dipped his head to hide. For a moment, the Aegis had felt so good that he hadn't remembered Hermione was there at all…</p><p>Severus' hand went down to card through Harry's hair, a sense of ownership and compassion thrumming through him. His words were for Harry, but he watched Hermione's face with a vindictive satisfaction. It was nothing short of throwing Harry over the table and growling <em>mine</em>.</p><p>"We must allow Miss Granger to observe what the bond wants, do we not? Just relax, Harry. You've been fighting it so strongly. Just let yourself be taken care of…I'm sure your friend is <em>mature</em> enough to realize it is hardly your fault that you crave to be treated this way."</p><p>"Of course. Harry, we discussed this. I really do need to study the bond and I can't do that if you suppress it."</p><p>"…Alright."</p><p>"Good boy."</p><p>Harry preened and Hermione tried her hardest not to think too much of it before she gathered her data. If the bond was responsible for this, then Dumbledore had a lot to answer for. But if Harry was in love as he said he was, then who was she to judge what made him happy? Merlin knew he deserved to be happy.</p><p>"I will talk to Narcissa about getting you books on bonding," Severus said crisply. "You are right to assume I have not had enough time to devote to the subject. We are rather on a tight schedule after all and the potion comes first."</p><p>"I understand," Hermione said.</p><p>"You may also use the bedroom to the left of the stairs. Harry and I are in the one across the hall."</p><p>It didn't surprise her that Harry and Snape shared a bedroom. What did surprise her was the matter-of-fact way he explained that she was getting a room as well…Snape had never meant for her to return to the trunk, she realized. He had already prepared for her to stay, which also meant that he had also likely anticipated her need to research the bond once she learned of it. The knowledge almost comforted her that Snape was unwilling to ask for help and tried to manipulate his way into getting it. As if he didn't expect the world would give him anything…</p><p>"<em>Thank you</em>, sir."</p><p>He must have heard something change in her tone because he started for a second before schooling his features. "You are welcome, Miss Granger."</p><p>She watched the thoughtful way he prepared Harry's plate and slipped it beneath the table for him. She couldn't see everything unless she absolutely craned her neck, but she knew Severus had more than once fed Harry straight from his own hand, particularly strawberries, from the bowl of fruit that appeared with a flick of his wand for desert…</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Happy New Year! I was going to post earlier, but then AO3 was down for a bit.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Another Gift</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Harry receives another gift.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After dinner, they retired to the living room, which seemed to be a routine the two of them had developed. Hermione was fascinated by the way Severus seemed just as enchanted with Harry, as Harry was with him. Secretly, she believed that they complemented each other, but her more conscious brain was still wary. What kind of bond could make two seemingly disparate people suddenly seem like two halves of a whole?</p><p>Harry might have insisted that he initiated the completion of the bond by his begging, but she caught glimpses of the hunger in Severus' eyes that would flicker out to be replaced by absolute adoration, and she was unconvinced. Something more was at play here.</p><p>"Tea? Coffee?" Harry's soft enquiry roused her from her thoughts and she smiled.</p><p>"Tea, please. Thank you, Harry."</p><p>"Be back in a moment."</p><p>And then Severus and Hermione were alone.</p><p>"You initial prognosis?" he asked darkly, getting straight to the point.</p><p>"It's strong," she whispered. "I think it really is a protection bond. I had my doubts but…I believe it."</p><p>He leaned his head back. "So he told you, of course, what I have done to him. That I have defiled him, hurt him, <em>ruined</em> him. And yet, you can see that he has refused to take my advice and stay away as much as this farce of a prison will allow."</p><p>"I don't think the bond would allow him to do that, sir, even if you weren't his guard…but you shouldn't dismiss Harry's feelings, either…May I?" She gestured to his wrist.</p><p>Severus nodded, extending his arm to her so that she could study the little silver mark. It was identical to Harry's, border and all. "Thank you," Severus said, so softly that she was almost sure she had imagined it.</p><p>"What for?" Hermione asked steadily. Maybe he acted differently with Dumbledore or McGonagall, but she had never heard him thank anyone in her life.</p><p>"For giving him what I cannot. For being his friend."</p><p>"Even when the bond wants you to skin me alive?" Hermione asked giving him a knowing look.</p><p>He eyed her. She was too perceptive for her own good. "Especially then," he conceded and the sincerity of that statement shook her to the core. Harry was right. Snape <em>did</em> fear the bond and what it was doing to him.</p><p>Hermione looked towards the direction of the kitchen then, wondering if Harry needed any help. It would be hard to juggle three mugs of hot beverages after all, with only two hands and no magic.</p><p>Having the same thought, Severus got up with a scowl that didn't quite meet his eyes. "He probably needs help and is too stubborn to ask for it."</p><p><em>Rather like you</em>, Hermione thought, and followed him out.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Harry walked into the kitchen, hoping that Hermione and Severus would be able to find some common ground, or at the very least, not skin each other alive the second he left them alone. He admired the fact that Hermione was determined not to look at him strangely as he allowed the Aegis to guide him. Even though it was a terrible thought, Harry was grateful that it was Hermione who survived…Ron would have never understood, or at least, there was a chance he'd come around, long after their last hope of escaping had passed.</p><p>But that was a terrible thought, and so Harry clamped down on it and let it drift away. In the kitchen, Harry filled the kettle with water and placed it back on the stove. It did not escape his notice that this birthday was better than any he had spent at the Dursleys. Ironic, really…He heaved a heavy sigh. If Aunt Petunia or Uncle Vernon or even Dudley could see him now—<em>Freak! Disgusting! Unnatural!</em> Their voices came from so far away, and these too he let fall.</p><p>He was halfway through another melancholy thought when his breath hitched in his throat. His eyes landed on an object he swore had not been there a minute ago, a little box wrapped in satin fabric with an extravagant golden bow sitting right there on the table.</p><p><em>Another gift?</em> It was too much, Harry thought with a little shake of his head. Severus had already freed his friend as much as he was able. What more could he ask for? It must be something special for him to want him to open it alone, away from Hermione's curious eyes.</p><p>He gently reached out and tugged at the golden ribbon, not wanting to cut it or ruin it in any way, not understanding why anyone would want to spend money on the actual gift wrapping. Or rather, he couldn't understand why anyone would want to make that kind of investment in <em>him</em>. The ribbon slid off the box and he carefully removed the black satin fabric before lifting the lid.</p><p>A cream colored envelope rested upon a pillow of silver tissue paper. Harry broke the seal and read, his eyes widening in surprise.</p><p>
  <strong>It would be remiss of me to not remember your birthday, my Unintended. After all, it was the reason I was drawn to you. While I cannot right the wrongs of the past, the future is ours to take. Lord Voldemort protects his own. I give you the gift of Justice.</strong>
</p><p>Harry's hands shook as he stared at the silver tissue paper, knowing something lurked beneath. He looked up once sharply, towards the living room, scared to be caught in the act of opening the gift further, scared to know what was below, but scared too to be stopped. He had to know. He carefully lifted out the first piece of paper, then the next, folding them next to the curled up ribbon.</p><p>The next piece of paper revealed the top of a crystal orb. <em>It could be a portkey or a curse or a trap</em>—but somehow, Harry didn't think so. The message had seemed oddly sentimental, <em>generous</em>, wanting to please, and further, Harry was already captured. Taking a deep breath, he cautiously reached into the box itself, pulling out the smooth sphere like a snitch, his hand completely covering it. <em>Too small to be a prophecy</em>, Harry thought, but he didn't open his fist. Just stared.</p><p>He opened his fist. The kettle whistled, the water boiling within, and his ears filled with a dull roar. He nearly dropped the glass ball in surprise as his heart began to race faster and faster. <em>I give you the gift of Justice</em>, indeed, for frozen within the orb was the eye of Mad-Eye Moody.</p><p>Harry's breathing came in short gasps as he clutched the table for support, throwing the orb back into the box as if he had been burned. How had Voldemort <em>known</em>? It was his secret, only his. Dumbledore had tried to cover it up and then he had died. There was no one left to tell.</p><p>His thoughts were blinking in and out of existence, trying to recall why he was so certain that Jaggers and McCalister were dead. Moody had died in the middle of his fifth year, in an accident, Dumbledore had claimed, promptly after being ejected from the Order, for reasons that made no sense and held no interest for Harry at the time. Long enough ago that Voldemort could not have plucked the memories from Moody's mind. That meant someone else…but who?</p><p><em>Tom</em>.</p><p>Tom who had promised he was not in communication with Voldemort and who very clearly was. Harry's legs gave out beneath him and he tucked his head between his knees, willing his vision to return. What was he going to do? Voldemort <em>knew</em>…he knew what Moody had done to him, knew what they had turned him into, knew that it was very possible for Harry to turn into his whore because he'd been broken already. Possible, if not for the Aegis…</p><p><em>Severus will protect you,</em> the Aegis seemed to say, but he couldn't be sure. All he knew was that he had to hide the gift before Severus (and now Hermione) started asking questions. Questions he didn't want to answer. Questions better left unasked. He forced himself to his feet and began shoving the letter and the tissue paper back inside the box—</p><p>"Harry?" <em>Shit! Shit! Shit!</em> "Harry? What is that?" Severus asked sharply, stepping fully into the kitchen with Hermione right beside him.</p><p>"It's-It's nothing," Harry stuttered, "I—"</p><p>"Don't <em>lie to me!"</em></p><p>"Snape, wait!" Hermione called, seeing a frightening look come over Severus' face.</p><p>It would have been smarter to cradle Harry in his arms, or coax the answer out of him in a post-orgasmic haze. But his instincts were on high alert. The Aegis was urging him to <em>protect, protect, protect</em>.</p><p>"Accio package!" Severus snapped, and the black box came zipping into Severus' outstretched hand, thudding against his palm.</p><p>Harry had gone very still. <em>He doesn't understand what it means, though</em>. He thought to himself. <em>Until he reads the note…</em></p><p>Severus shoved the box into Hermione's hands as he rifled through it, grabbing the letter and holding it up to the light. His frown deepened.</p><p>"It's in parselscript," he snarled, catching Harry's eye. "This is from the Dark Lord."</p><p>Harry blinked. He hadn't noticed that it was in parselscript at all.</p><p>"But the back is in English…" Hermione chimed in helpfully, reading, "Intention to court Harry James Potter with the presentation of the first of three priceless gifts." She gasped. "Harry! That can't be right!"</p><p>Harry paled drastically. He hadn't known there was a back, actually, but now it made all the more sense. This was a gift of courtship…<em>But why?</em> What had changed? Had Tom…?</p><p>"Actually, Miss Granger, it is entirely possible for the Dark Lord to court another. He has been increasingly obsessed with having Harry by his side…and before now, I never had considered that Harry might actually <em>want </em>that too." His tone was bitingly cold and Harry felt like he had been slapped in the face.</p><p>The Aegis in Harry coiled defensively. "I want to be with <em>you</em>, Severus," he insisted, green eyes going wide.</p><p>"That's not quite the same as saying no," Severus hissed, reaching inside the box and pulling out a smooth round object, determined to know what the Dark Lord thought could woo Harry away from <em>him</em>. When he held the orb up to the light, he was surprised to hear his own gasp beside the girl's. His eyes were cold, calculating, gleaming. "Why <em>exactly</em>, Harry, is the Dark Lord courting you with the eye of Alastor Moody?" His voice had gone dangerously soft, making Harry want to prostrate himself before him and beg for his forgiveness. But instead, Harry held firm, pure fear and survival instinct holding him upright. He shoved the Aegis away from him forcefully and stared Severus straight in the eyes. He wasn't afraid. He would not allow the Aegis to bully him.</p><p>"You cannot be <em>jealous</em> of the Dark Lord, Severus," Harry chastised, hoping he sounded like the reasonable adult here. "You knew that the conditions of claiming me were that you would break me and I would return to him at the end of the year. I will not be subjected to your anger because <em>you</em> had not foreseen this!"</p><p>"Then what does it say?" Severus demanded, taking a step closer. "Tell me what he has written to you and the Aegis will back off. It feels <em>threatened</em> now, Harry. I'm trying to contain it, believe me, but right now I feel as if I could kill the Dark Lord himself."</p><p>Harry studied his face closely then, seeing the man he loved in active combat with the Aegis he had forced him to accept. It was supposed to be a protection bond, but Severus was falling apart, he could see that clear as day.</p><p>"That's it!" Hermione cried, startling them both into looking at her. "That's why Dumbledore wanted me to look into bonds. Not just because he feared the bond would transfer to someone else, but because he <em>knew</em> it would. The bond is the key. Isn't it obvious? This is what will defeat You-Know-Who!"</p><p>Severus shuddered lightly, the change in topic enough for him to reassert dominance over the Aegis and focus on what Hermione was saying. "You are suggesting that Harry and I wield this bond like a weapon, despite the fact that it is defensive in nature?"</p><p>"Not entirely defensive," Harry murmured. "I kept trying to place it but I couldn't. I remember now though. When you came home early that Friday night," he gave a look that left no mystery about which Friday night he was talking about, "you didn't just fling Draco across the room, you also <em>burnt</em> him. It was like how Quirrel reacted to skin-to-skin contact back in my first year."</p><p>"That may be, but to my great chagrin and growing irritation, I cannot control it," Severus sighed. "It wants to hurt everything that so much as dares to look at you, and yet, I've been in the Dark Lord's presence several times after we've completed the bond and it hasn't risen in your defense the way it did with Draco."</p><p>"That just means it needs some kind of trigger," Hermione said, undeterred. "Something that will activate its protective powers…" Hermione got that look on her face that Harry recognized as her <em>I have an idea and need to go the library</em> face. "I need to do some research. When can Narcissa be back?"</p><p>"I shall let Narcissa know to come this weekend," Severus said. "The more we know about the Aegis, the better. Still," he glanced at the crystal orb before putting it back in the box with disdain. "I would like to know, Harry, as a concerned <em>partner</em> what the Dark Lord has said to you. The Aegis has retreated momentarily, so I am not asking out of misguided jealousy, as you have rightly pointed out. I am asking as one who knows that the Dark Lord's gifts are often not what they appear. This may mean he is keeping a close watch on us, or that he suspects, if not knows, that we are doing things against his wishes…or it may mean something entirely different."</p><p>Harry fought to keep his face neutral. He could understand from a strategic point of view why Severus would want to know what the letter said. But it was his birthday, an emotionally taxing one, and he knew he wouldn't be able to handle anything more that day…if ever. "If I tell you what he wants it to mean, will you promise not to ask me any more questions tonight?"</p><p>Severus thought it over and nodded. It was better to be aware, than not at all. "I promise."</p><p>Harry took a deep breath. "He said it was the gift of Justice."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Legilimency</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus dives into Harry's mind.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Extra long chapter for you. Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Severus had not broached the subject of Moody's eyeball for several weeks. Harry was obstinately tight-lipped on the subject and evaded all of Severus' attempts to get him to talk. He had even approached Granger out of pure desperation, but the girl didn't know anything more than he did, and wouldn't tell him even if she did. She had simply reminded him, quite pointedly, of all the work she was doing for them, gesturing to the piles of archival literature cluttering the bedroom. It was true. Granger <em>was</em> working diligently on the problem at hand.</p><p>She and Narcissa were often engaged in deep discussion, and it was fortuitous that Narcissa had the pureblood background to answer all of Granger's incessant questions about various types of esoteric bonds. Bonds which held together the fabric of pureblood society for decades: forced marriage bonds between two enemies, feud-ending sacrificial bonds like having the first-born child of one family being raised in the other, arranged marriage bonds to ensure fidelity, etc.</p><p>Granger had also gone through Harry's translation of Salazar's own book, but nowhere else could she find a reference to the Aegis in all of Narcissa's library, nor could she find another bond which had a description that mentioned time travel, which had led to a separate avenue of research. Now, she had Narcissa pulling every book from the Malfoy library that had to do with time travel, most of them purely theoretical.</p><p>It made Severus wonder how the Healer had known about the Aegis at all…</p><p>And thus, with Granger otherwise occupied, and Harry refusing to talk about it, Severus was left to come up with a solution of his own.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Harry stood opposite him in the laboratory, thinly slicing the ginger root with precise movements of his knife. There were eight miniature cauldrons simmering in the background, each one of sixty-four potential intermediate solutions that he wanted to test.</p><p>"I think I should legilimize you," Severus said suddenly, startling Harry into dropping his knife with a clatter. Harry whipped his head up to look at him, his emerald eyes searching Severus' face.</p><p>"You can't," Harry immediately said.</p><p>"Not if you <em>let</em> me in," Severus countered, still not meeting Harry's eyes.</p><p>Harry studied Severus' hands, trying to calm his thoughts that tumbled out a mile a minute. Surely, even with his inconsistent occlumency shields, Severus could have just tried to rip whatever it was from his mind. Why warn him at all? He had to know Harry might say no. <em>How do you know he hasn't tried to legilimize you before without your knowledge?</em></p><p>"Why are you telling me this?" Harry asked slowly. "Is this about Moody again? Because you know that I, that I can't—"</p><p>"Shhh. I understand that, Harry. I even understand that the memory is most likely traumatic because of your reluctance to share it with me. That is why I am willing to offer you this alternative…."</p><p><em>He must be desperate</em>, Harry thought and he wanted to give in, he did. But could he allow Severus to see what had happened to him? What if there were more memories locked away that he didn't even know about yet? Would he be willing to allow Severus to access them even before Harry himself knew they existed?</p><p>"I think I should say yes," Harry said softly. "But I just don't know if I can handle it. Dumbledore locked those memories away when he invoked the Aegis…what if I can't relive them again? What if it breaks me?"</p><p>Severus walked around the workstation and gathered Harry into his arms, breathing in the scent of his hair. "You are very far from broken, Harry. And if you think you cannot relive them for whatever reason, then we will stop."</p><p>"Wouldn't a pensieve be better?"</p><p>Severus shook his head. "I had considered it, but no. It is risky to mess with those particular memories after having them concealed from you for so long. Reintroducing them to your mind might have…unpleasant consequences, and I dare not keep them from you forever when the Dark Lord is acting on them."</p><p>Harry nodded against Severus' warm chest. His hugs were nothing like Hermione's. There was an undercurrent of possessiveness—of protectiveness. He swallowed.</p><p>They added the ginger root and some dragon blood to each of the eight potions in varying amounts. All but two turned a sickly green. The other two shimmered gold and silver.</p><p>"Does that mean it worked?" Harry asked. "We can move on to the next phase?"</p><p>Severus was slow to react, stirring the golden potion and sniffing the top of the silver one. With the right instruction and proper motivation, Harry was becoming a veritable potions master. He was all but Severus' own apprentice, driving them towards progress at a speed he had not anticipated. <em>Too fast. </em>Harry couldn't see the storm brewing in his eyes.</p><p>"Yes, it means we are one step closer."</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>"<em>Legilimens!"</em></p><p>Severus' obsidian eyes bored into Harry's own. They were nearly nose to nose in the study, Severus' wand held out in front of him, brandished like a knife. Harry blinked innocently when the room didn't spin. He opened his mouth.</p><p>"Severus, I don't think it's working."</p><p>"You need to let me in, Harry. You're fighting it, fighting <em>me</em>." He tried not to sound so personally offended, but he was failing miserably.</p><p>"Hey, I agreed to let you in," Harry reminded him. "I'm not blocking you out on purpose!" The irony of the situation did not escape him. "Maybe I just need to be <em>distracted</em>?"</p><p>"And how, pray tell, shall I distract you?" Severus asked. His voice had gone smooth as honey and he allowed his gaze to travel up and down Harry's body, making the boy blush despite himself. "Shall I kiss you—steal the breath from your lungs—make you forget your name?" He took a predatory step forward and Harry felt himself leaning in excitedly, his heart racing.</p><p>"Oh yes…"</p><p>"Or shall I shove my cock down your pretty little throat until you can't think of anything else but me?"</p><p>"Hmmm, even better…" Harry purred in challenge.</p><p>"Well let's start with the one and see how it goes," Severus smirked and then he crossed the distance between them, capturing Harry's mouth in a gentle kiss. Harry moaned low in his throat, his hands coming tentatively up to clutch at Severus' arms. He almost didn't hear the whisper: "<em>Legilimens!"</em></p><p>Memories rushed passed, all at once now. Days filled with nothing but brewing and reading and laughing alongside Severus, talking with Hermione and occasionally Narcissa, making dinner, having sex…He could feel emotions pouring off each one of his memories, ranging from warm and full to faintly mistrustful and jealous when he thought of Narcissa. That was enough to make Severus laugh faintly to himself. The boy had nothing to worry about. Severus was all <em>his</em>.</p><p>Then a memory floated up to the surface with foggy edges, of a room surrounded by sky and a large table surrounded by chairs, not all of them empty…</p><p><em>Fifth year, </em>Harry's voice echoed loudly in his mind. <em>It began during the summer of my fourth year, but didn't start becoming bad until fifth year.</em></p><p>Severus abruptly turned away from the fuzzy memory and dove headlong into the sea. He passed the memory of Umbridge <em>marking</em> Harry with her bloodquill, the very thought making his blood boil, and knew he was in the right place. He slowed down, carefully wading through the pool of Harry's fifth year memories. There were memories of Harry training the Defense Association, a brief memory of Cho Chang of all people crying as she tried to kiss Harry. <em>Pitiful</em>. Then he saw them—memories that were agitated and red, bound together by an invisible thread. Some memories had shaken loose from their hold, those that were able to plague Harry's sleep, but there were a mountain of others, each struggling to break free. <em>But which one?</em></p><p>In answer, Harry's mind shuffled the memories so that he was staring at a single one, one that was nearly free from the rest, but which hadn't separated fully yet. <em>I think this one is near the end, </em>Harry said, <em>But I don't think I've seen it yet…view it with me?</em> It seemed that his voice trembled, even in his mind.</p><p>Severus nodded firmly. He meant what he said. He would help Harry process whatever trauma lay buried, if only so the Dark Lord couldn't twist it and use it against them. But it was more than that. He <em>cared</em>. The memory floated towards him and then the world became white.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Severus was dumped into the memory as it was taking place. He looked around him with the practiced eyes of a spy, immediately realizing they were no longer at Hogwarts. The walls were made of polished black marble so that the torchlight bounced off of them.</p><p>Harry was on the ground, kneeling without clothes, his hands chained behind him. In front of him were three battle-hardened aurors, Moody seeming to be the leader. His magical eye whizzed around in his head as he stalked towards the boy. Severus had never seen him quite like this before. He had never liked Moody, particularly because he had never quite given up on the idea that Severus was a loyal Death Eater and would repeatedly bring it up during Order meetings, setting Black off to foam at the mouth…but this was another thing entirely.</p><p>"Something's different about you, Potter," Moody said gruffly, his voice clear and loud in the emptiness of the abandoned corridor. He snapped his fingers, signaling to the others to position Harry on his hands and knees. "What did you <em>do</em>?"</p><p>"N-nothing," Harry said, his eyes watering with unshed tears.</p><p>"<em>Crucio!</em>"</p><p>Harry writhed on the ground as the two other aurors laughed.</p><p>"He won't speak, isn't that noble? McCalister, Jaggers!" Moody barked, "You know what to do."</p><p>Severus watched in horror as the two aurors began to strip off their auror robes, before taking up their positions on either side of Harry's body. It was clear that Harry knew what was coming because he shut his eyes, the trembling not yet gone from his limbs.</p><p>"Oh, yes, Potter, I know how much you fight against your nature, how much you love it when you're used," Moody taunted. "I can see the magic in you. It's changed. A new scheme of yours to get rid of me, perhaps? I have not forgotten when you tried to run away…but you paid for that, didn't you?"</p><p>Harry whimpered and then screamed as the two aurors breeched him at once, having no care in the world for Harry's comfort, or whether he needed to breathe at all.</p><p>"Take it, Potter!" one of them groaned.</p><p>"What a perfect slut…"</p><p>Moody squatted down beside the boy, wiping a tear that had rolled down Harry's cheek. He smiled viciously and brandished his wand. "<em>Legilimens</em>."</p><p>For a moment, nothing happened. Moody continued to glare daggers at the boy. "What is this?" he growled. "Have you gone crawling to a protector, Potter? Someone who is able to shield your mind from afar? Do you hear that, lads? Potter has entered into a protection bond! What did it cost, Potter? Was it the bond of the Styx? Have you promised them your undying love? Or was it the bond of the Lethe? Perhaps you have decided to be nothing but a fucktoy after all." He laughed, filling the cavernous halls with the sound.</p><p>The aurors' breathing grew labored. Their cheeks were flushed as they sped up their movements, nearly to the precipice…and then they were spilling their seed inside of him with simultaneous groans of pleasure. But their high was short-lived.</p><p>From the shadows, a clear, calm voice answered, "It is the Aegis bond, Alastor."</p><p>Severus had been so engrossed in what was happening, his own rage and need to protect swelling inside of him like the ocean's tide, that he hadn't noticed Albus Dumbledore arriving and moving just now into the light. His face was full of thunder.</p><p>"Albus," Alastor said confidently, his eye twitching. "We were just practicing what might happen if he were captured. It isn't real, Albus."</p><p>Harry was staring at Dumbledore like he couldn't believe that he was really here. Hadn't he begged and begged and begged for him to be saved? And he couldn't for the life of him remember anything about an Aegis or a protection bond…</p><p>Albus raised his wand, pointing it straight at Moody. "You have betrayed my trust, Alastor. You were to train him as I had hoped you would if Barty Crouch Jr. had not captured you. Perhaps your time in captivity has truly driven you over the edge, into madness and cruelty. I cannot allow you to leave."</p><p>"P-please sir!" one of the aurors said, "We were just following orders, sir!"</p><p>"Tell them, Potter! Tell the headmaster that you love it."</p><p>Brokenly, Harry whispered, "I love it."</p><p>A dam seemed to break then, and Albus brought his wand slashing down with a series of sparks. Moody screeched as his bones began to crack, his body dissolving as if left in a vat of acid. His magical eye, tumbled from the skull to roll across the floor, where Albus picked it up and slipped it into his robes. Then Albus raised his hand and pointed it towards the two aurors. They flinched back before they knew what was happening to them.</p><p>"This ends now!" His voice was full of authority as the Aegis' power snapped into existence, burning the skins of the aurors, giant blisters forming red and angry, the Aegis appearing as several twining silver snakes of pure magic, squeezing them tighter and tighter…Their screams were silenced by a swish of Dumbledore's wand. There was no mercy in his clear, blue eyes.</p><p>Only when all that remained of their bodies was a pile of ash did Albus move towards Harry, enveloping him in a hug, hiding his body within the folds of his purple robes.</p><p>"I am so sorry, my boy. So so sorry."</p><p>Harry couldn't see through his tears. He knew he was shaking, knew that he was numb and tired and wasn't able to fully accept the help that Albus was giving him. He could feel the ejaculate slipping out of his arse, from a man he had just watched die before his eyes. Albus stood up, pulling Harry to his chest.</p><p>"This should never have happened, my boy. They have broken you and for that, I can never forgive myself." Harry stared back with dull green eyes as Albus sent his will down the bond. "But I will protect you. I promise you that. Please…just <em>fall asleep</em>."</p><p>Harry slumped down into his arms, fast asleep and the headmaster walked briskly out, out into the atrium. And only then did Severus realize that they had been in the Department of Mysteries all along.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Severus emerged from Harry's memory, to find himself on the floor, cradling the present day Harry to his chest.</p><p>"I don't remember that at all," Harry said in wonder. "That was…I <em>killed</em> them. They died because of me! The bond would have killed Draco too if we had let it!"</p><p>Severus too was shaking. He had felt the power of the bond rise inside himself, rearing to strike, memory or not. And who knew what kind of damage that could cause if he were to unleash that power in Harry's mind? "They hurt you," Severus hissed. "How could I not have known? How could I not have seen the signs?"</p><p>"But, Severus, It wasn't your fault."</p><p>"I would kill them all over again!" Severus growled. "I see now why the Dark Lord gave you that gift. Moody deserved far worse than the curse that Albus gave him. I would bet anything that the Dark Lord had tortured what remained of Moody before encasing him in that crystal…But you must not believe him. <em>I </em>can protect you. <em>I</em> will be the one to protect you! Not <em>him</em>. ME."</p><p>Harry hugged him tighter. "I know that."</p><p>"What I don't understand," Severus cried, "Is why Albus allowed them to <em>finish</em> inside of you when it was clear he was watching from the very beginning."</p><p>"Maybe it has to do with the bond," Harry offered. He had wondered much the same, scared to entertain the thought that Albus had even enjoyed it, even though all signs were to the contrary. "You defended me from Draco, but it only burnt him. R-raping me is a much greater offense. I think the bond acted accordingly to the level of threat…Even a kiss might be enough if the possessive nature of the bond felt threatened."</p><p>Severus frowned deeply in thought. Those aurors must have had files at the Ministry. He wondered what story Albus had spun to keep the entire thing quiet or explain away the disappearances of three senior aurors. He already knew that Moody has been "killed" in an accident. He had of yet heard about the other two…Which made it seem all the more intriguing.</p><p>Albus liked to leave hints like it was an Easter Egg hunt, unable or unwilling to be transparent for once about any one of his grand plans. It would be just like Albus to leave something at the Ministry, in a file no one would have any reason to look at, except for someone with Harry's memories. Memories, Albus knew, that would eventually return when he died.</p><p>He knew immediately <em>who</em> could get him those files…but not without a price.</p><p>"As loath as I am to share you with anyone, I fear that we should <em>practice</em> triggering the Aegis before going before the Dark Lord. I still believe the potion is our first course of action, but eventually you will have to face him. I would rather not leave him alive after a failed assassination attempt."</p><p>"You already have someone in mind," Harry said lowly.</p><p>"I do."</p><p>"I'm not going to like who it is, will I?"</p><p>"Not likely, no. However, it cannot be anyone else because I plan to use this opportunity to ask him for a favor. I need him to access some files for me without rousing suspicion."</p><p>Harry sighed. "You won't let Lucius actually hurt me, will you?" he asked. "I don't mind, really, being used to gather information…but you won't just leave me to him, will you?"</p><p>Severus clutched the boy tighter to his chest. The boy knew it would be Lucius and instead of protesting, simply asked for it not to be terrible. His heart clenched. "No. It would be unwise for anyone to find out that we are testing the limits of the bond. That means I cannot kill him or injure him grievously, which in turn means he cannot hurt you grievously…but it is still a risk, if you are willing to take it."</p><p>Harry pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Of course."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Limits</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Lucius is indulged...for a little while.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Whew, sorry it took awhile. I got distracted with a bunch of other plot bunnies. Recalcitrant little things. Here's an extra-long chapter to make it up to you. :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I have a proposition," Severus said without preamble.</p><p>It was another alcohol laden Friday night at Malfoy Manor. The weather was getting colder, snappier, and so each and every fireplace was roaring to a full blaze. It made Severus feel entirely too warm, wrapped up in his black cloak, but he refused to remove it.</p><p>Lucius' interest was piqued right away. Negotiations were his bread and butter. "Oh, do tell, Severus."</p><p>"I need you to access the full files of two aurors."</p><p>"Names?"</p><p>"Jaggers and McCalister."</p><p>Lucius took a sip of dark red liquor, the color of blood. "Ah…there's no one in rotation with those names. <em>Deceased</em> aurors, I presume?"</p><p>Severus managed to hold back a snort. "Obviously."</p><p>"Then I shall take a look." Lucius studied the flames as they danced beyond the grate, looking for all the world like he was in dire need of a rest. "However, I feel that being Minister of Magic is such a taxing job. Of course, I am happy to please my lord, but time is so very precious these days for much else."</p><p>Severus was surprised at his luck. It was not an outright refusal, although, he had not expected it to be. Either way, he knew what he offered would be irresistible. "Not so busy that you wouldn't be able to visit, Lucius?"</p><p>Lucius tore his eyes from the fire to look at Severus in surprise. "I was under the impression that you didn't take well to visitors."</p><p>In an equally light tone, Severus replied, "Not those who trespass without my permission."</p><p>"Oh?" Lucius raised a delicate eyebrow. "So I will have your permission then? How perfectly generous of you, Severus…One must wonder what is contained in these files that you would want them at all."</p><p>"I wouldn't know," Severus snapped. "That's why I'm asking you to get them for me."</p><p>"Of course, of course…" Lucius pretended to mull it over, when it was perfectly clear he was going to accept. "Tomorrow at three?" Lucius held out his hand, his smile entirely too smug. Severus shook it.</p><p>
  <em>I will enjoy setting the Aegis on you.</em>
</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Hermione had worked with Harry and Severus on the set-up of the experiment. Lucius Malfoy, Test Subject Number One. Hermione had it written down on a notepad that Severus had spelled to only reveal itself to their eyes only. She read the plan aloud now, right before Lucius Malfoy was set to arrive.</p><p>"Alright, Snape, as I won't be in the room with you, I am relying on you to remember as much detail as possible. How you feel, what you see, and if the Aegis is telling you anything. Harry? If you sense the bond is too strong and will tear Lucius apart, you need to tell Severus to pull it back. We need those files and we don't want to tip You-Know-Who off that you could be dangerous."</p><p>Both men nodded. Hermione continued. "Stage one. Harry you said that you could convince the Aegis that submitting to someone else temporarily, if it was in Snape's best interest would be possible. I'd like you to test that with Lucius, verbally committing that you will be able to obey him. And Snape, please try to remember not to kill him. You're practically growling at me right now!"</p><p>"I'm sorry, I will endeavor to do my best," Severus sighed, placing a hand on Harry's shoulder to steady him.</p><p>"Right. Stage two, we want to see if you can achieve a medium level of protection like the kind that came to Harry's defense against Draco. Nothing major. It is important that you get a feel for what different levels of power feel like, or if it really is all or nothing and Draco surviving was just a fluke. And lastly, I think that we should try to test the limits of this bond and get as close as you can to killing him without killing him."</p><p>"Just get close to it, got it Hermione," Harry beamed, but she could tell that he was still nervous about going ahead with the plan. That was part of the reason why Hermione would be locked in the trunk, which doubled as her hidden office, so that Harry wouldn't be too embarrassed to do what he needed to do. It also helped to hide her, as Lucius was convinced she was dead. Severus didn't want to have to explain that the Dark Lord did in fact know Hermione was alive or how he had convinced him to let her into his care, so to speak…and so he allowed Harry to do the work for him, convincing Hermione to stay out of sight.</p><p>"Alright then," Hermione said. "Just don't forget to confound him and make him believe he actually enjoyed himself. I'm dying to know if Dumbledore left something in those files and you know he won't actually get them if he remembers even a millisecond of torture."</p><p>"Do you doubt my abilities, Miss Granger?" Severus challenged.</p><p>"No, but I think you might very well be distracted," Hermione quipped. "I'm just reminding you. That's all."</p><p>"Thanks, Hermione," Harry grinned. "We'll see you later then, yeah?"</p><p>"Of course," Hermione said. "Good luck."</p><p>Severus had tried to reassure Harry as best he could that everything was going to be alright, but Harry was cautious by nature. Harry acutely remembered the last time Lucius had come over to the house and it wasn't pretty. Now, Severus and Harry would be the ones in charge, not that Lucius would ever know it…but it didn't stop the trembling in his limbs. Surely, Lucius would expect more of him now, now that Severus had offered.</p><p>"Do not be ashamed," Severus whispered to him. "Do whatever you need to do. Even if I get angry and you can feel it down the bond, don't stop. That's the whole point, after all."</p><p>"I know," Harry said. His face was determined. "I can do this."</p><p>What layers and levels of mental gymnastics had led him to this point? Practicing sexual acts with Draco had been the height of betrayal for Severus. Yet, Lucius' assault had hurt them both. Now, they would allow Lucius to believe he was having his fun, all with Severus' permission, while Severus allowed his envy and anger to stew to be unleashed…for their own benefit.</p><p>It wasn't quite shame that gripped him, nor embarrassment. Harry had lost all sense of modesty long ago. It was something akin to fear. He didn't like when the bond took over Severus, because part of him was terrified that Severus was never coming back…</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Lucius Malfoy was punctual. His long blond hair was tied in a bow at his nape, his snake-head cane by his side. He had apparated and knocked on their front door precisely at three in the afternoon. Harry got into position, kneeling in the center of the mostly empty room, save for a chair, a table, and a freshly scourgified carpet.</p><p>"Ah, Lucius, come in." Severus restrained himself from making a comment about Lucius' eagerness, but only because he didn't want to goad the man too soon. He was supposed to be reluctantly agreeing to this, not rejoicing in Lucius' eagerness.</p><p>"I was planning on staying an hour," Lucius commented mildly as Severus led him through the house. "That won't be a problem, I hope?"</p><p>"Not at all," Severus replied. "I just hope you are not averse to me watching. The Dark Lord has entrusted me with his safety and care. You understand, of course."</p><p>"Of course."</p><p>Lucius entered the room, his eyes pinning Harry in place as if he would bolt, whatever Severus had promised him. "<em>Harry</em>, long time, no see…"</p><p>The aristocrat draped his outer robes on the table as Severus took a seat on the chair, crossing his legs elegantly as if to relax and enjoy the show. Only Harry noticed that he kept his wand held subtly between his fingers, hidden mostly by his sleeve.</p><p>Harry looked up quickly into Lucius' eyes, then quickly back down. "Much more submissive than last time," he commented, turning his head to look at Severus. "Quite an achievement. I commend you."</p><p>"Harry, Lucius has just complimented you. What do you say?"</p><p>"Thank you," Harry murmured, concealing his surprise by dipping his head even lower. He trusted Severus to maneuver them into each of the three stages of Hermione's plan. He just hadn't expected those onyx black eyes to be glittering quite so much.</p><p>"And—?" That was Severus' voice again, expectant, impatient. "Do you agree to obey Lucius for the next hour?"</p><p>Lucius laughed softly. "Why not simply command him, Severus?"</p><p>"Because," Severus said, in a tone that implied that Lucius was an idiot. "When he is to bow before the Dark Lord, no amount of commanding will make him bend his head. He must <em>on some level</em> agree."</p><p>Harry looked up, his green eyes catching the light. Despite Severus' words, he could feel the Aegis beginning to stir between them, as if sniffing the air and wondering if a battle was near. He met Lucius' silver eyes, speaking slowly, drawing each word out carefully as if that would allow them to come out. "I will submit," Harry said, wondering if adding <em>for the hour</em> was necessary, but the glare Severus sent him certainly implied so. "For the hour." He bowed his head.</p><p>"Charming," Lucius was drawling, "Perhaps if I had also been given as many months as you, my friend, our roles would have been reversed.</p><p>"Yes, what a pity."</p><p>But Lucius had stopped listening and was gazing down at Harry hungrily. He flicked his wand, banishing his fine clothes and leaving him standing naked, like a marble sculpture, before him. Harry couldn't help but look appreciatively at him. There was no denying that he was beautiful, more beautiful objectively than Severus, though Harry couldn't help but wish it were he who stood before him.</p><p>"Rise," Lucius hissed, embracing Harry as he stood, so that Harry's head could fit comfortably in the crook of his neck. "A kiss," he stated, knowing that such an action was more personal and could only be viewed as a challenge thrown in Severus' direction.</p><p>Yet Severus made no sound of protest, even as Harry could feel the Aegis thrumming in his veins, making his heart pound faster and faster. He pressed his lips softly to Lucius' mouth, when the blond deepened the kiss, placing a hand on the back of Harry's neck to keep him from moving away. Lucius' tongue slid in and out, moving against Harry's own, in the cavern of his mouth and along his teeth. He bit down on Harry's lips, drawing blood and lapping at that too. There was nothing romantic about the kiss. It was made of pure passion, the kind of poisoned apples. Harry's cock began to harden and he tried to angle away so that Lucius couldn't feel it. But of course, the bastard did.</p><p>Harry looked away, his face flushed. The Aegis was gaining in power, swelling with untold punishment. When Harry chanced a glance at Severus, his eyes were blazing. <em>Stage two, stage two!</em> Harry wanted to remind him, getting the distinct impression that Severus wanted to hurl the full might of the Aegis at Lucius at once. <em>Stage two, Severus!</em></p><p>Severus' head suddenly jolted back. He stared at Harry with slightly widened eyes, such that Lucius wouldn't have been able to tell. <em>Stage two!</em> Harry continued to think at the man, willing the message down the bond. Then Severus gave the slightest of nods and the blond hissed beside him, looking down at his hand in wonder, the hand that had held Harry's neck, and which was now rapidly turning red, painful blisters breaking out along his alabaster skin.</p><p>Before Lucius could even say a word, Severus had risen out of his chair, holding up a potion's vial. "It looks like a delayed burn effect from cursed parchment," Severus said with an air of authority. "Dolores Umbridge was known to use just that kind at Hogwarts. You haven't seen her lately, have you?"</p><p>Lucius looked up with unbridled anger. Umbridge had been made the Head of the Auror Department and he dealt with her on an almost daily basis, tallying up the number of wanted and captured rebels, much to his utmost displeasure. "Indeed I have," he said with disdain. He took the vial and downed the liquid after giving it a sniff, the swelling in his hand going down almost immediately. "I shall have to have a talk with her…" he said, more to himself than anyone else. "Thank you."</p><p>"What other use is there for a potions master?" Severus remarked flippantly, taking back the empty vial and slipping into his seat again.</p><p>"You're lucky, Potter," Lucius murmured. "That Severus can heal whatever marks I might leave upon your skin. Are you up for a little pain today?"</p><p><em>Are you? </em>Harry thought. "If you wish it," Harry said instead. He could feel that only a little of the Aegis' power had been used in that one attack, most of it still broiling around as an invisible force. So Severus was able to control it, then, Harry thought. That was good to know.</p><p>Lucius summoned his cane to him with an outstretched hand. "Over the table, Potter. You remember this game don't you?"</p><p>Harry refused to meet Severus' eyes as he braced himself on the table. Severus was so very near with a front row seat, just as Lucius intended it. The first blow came as a surprise.</p><p>"O-one! Thank you, sir," Harry stuttered out. He had forgotten how much it stung, how expertly Lucius wielded the cane. "T-t-two! Thank you, sir!"</p><p>Lucius smirked, rubbing his hands soothingly over Harry's buttocks. "Perhaps we should start where we left off? Count fifty-three this time, <em>Harry</em>."</p><p>Another blow. Harry distantly heard himself counting and thanking the man, his soul curling up into himself like a turtle shell. The Aegis was gaining power, but how much more power could it hold? He had thought they had reached their limitations a while ago…</p><p><em>Harry?</em> Severus' voice was suddenly in his head, flowing through the bond. Harry almost slipped up and lost count. "S-seventy-nine," Harry cried, before hastily adding, "Thank you, sir!"</p><p><em>When? </em>Harry asked desperately, <em>When?</em></p><p>
  <em>It is only half full.</em>
</p><p>That made Harry's legs completely give out beneath him. Only half?</p><p>Lucius chuckled darkly, catching Harry as he crumbled to the ground. "An overestimation," Lucius sneered, "No matter. Slytherins can be so <em>flexible</em> when they need to be. Whatever plans we may have had may suddenly change," he continued. Harry had closed his eyes as he was arranged on the table so that his legs hung over the edge. He was unable to witness the silent communication between the two men, taking place as flashes between their eyes. "We Slytherins win in the end, Potter. But the definition of winning may not be what you think."</p><p>"I didn't know you were a philosopher, Lucius," Severus sneered.</p><p>"The boy brings it out in me," Lucius said, lazily stroking his own erection. "Remember, Potter, our talk on currency? Perhaps you should enlighten Severus as he's much more willing to listen to you."</p><p>Harry opened his eyes in time to see Severus stiffen. He opened his mouth obediently. "The price of something is not what it costs, but what you're willing to pay. Is-is that right, Lucius?"</p><p>"Simply perfect," Lucius drawled, petting Harry mockingly in praise. "And what do you think it means, Potter?"</p><p>"That sometimes we see value where there is none," Harry said absently, knowing Lucius was hinting at something either for Severus or for him, or for both, but couldn't focus properly with the man's hands fondling his balls. He knew his cock was hard and leaking, but Hermione had lectured him for days on the body's reactions and that just because one orgasmed during rape, didn't make it any less of a rape.</p><p>"And you said that boy was lacking brains, Severus."</p><p>"Perhaps he just needed the proper motivation," Severus said tightly. The Aegis was coiled, ready to strike, but Severus held it back. He felt that he could control it now, after having gotten a feel for it twice. He knew he could stop it from murdering Lucius, but he would come close. He just had to know…why had Dumbledore allowed those two disgusting aurors to ejaculate inside his Harry? There had to be a reason, likely to do with sex magic and sacrifice, and this might be their only chance of finding out. He would not ask this of Harry again. He could not stand to have another touch him like this, have him like this.</p><p><em>Severus</em>, Harry whined softly, knowing what was next, begging for Severus to make it stop. But Severus did not answer.</p><p>Lucius used a lubrication charm and slicked it over his cock. He parted Harry's cheeks, lining himself up, and thrust in fully. Harry sucked in a harsh breath, trying to stay in the present as Lucius pounded in and out with smooth, powerful thrusts, hitting his prostrate once or twice, but not out of any consideration.</p><p><em>Why? </em>Harry asked through the bond. <em>Save me, Severus. Please</em>. He knew what the man was likely thinking, knew that Severus had to have been inspired by the memory and wanted to see it for himself. But didn't he realize that Harry couldn't take it? <em>Stop! We don't need to reach stage three! Hermione will understand!</em></p><p>Silence.</p><p>Eventually, he stopped pleading.</p><p>Lucius gripped his hips hard enough to bruise, his mouth latching onto Harry's right nipple, biting down on it as he continued to thrust. Harry clenched down around him, hoping he could get him off sooner and be done. Lucius' only reaction was to smirk down at him as if he knew what Harry was thinking, but could appreciate it none-the-less. His movements sped up and Harry could tell he was close. He braced himself, knowing on some level that the Aegis would not harm him, but couldn't bring himself to believe it. One knew to run if there was an explosion.</p><p>Lucius groaned as he spilled himself inside of Harry. His face was triumphant for all of three seconds.</p><p><em>Now</em>, Severus commanded.</p><p><em>With pleasure</em>, the Aegis purred, and swept up in a wave of silver snakes, fangs barred and hissing towards their victim. Lucius' eyes widened, springing back from Harry, but it was too late.</p><p>The snakes tore into his flesh, squeezing his chest, stinging his eyes. They moved <em>through </em>him, made of pure magic. <em>Protect, protect, protect. </em>Harry could only watch in amazement, as if the Aegis were but the physical manifestation of his suffering. It was a kind of sacrificial magic, Harry realized, the kind his mother's death had given him, the kind that allowed the dementor to escape, the kind which demanded a sacrifice and twisted it and sharpened it until it became a weapon.</p><p>It was only when he blinked did he realize that Severus was smiling down at the tortured man, his eyes alight with glee. Lucius was looking paler by the second, his blood spilling out of him, his skin literally burning.</p><p>"Stop, Severus, you're killing him!" Harry screamed out loud, "You have to pull it back!" He couldn't have cared one whit about Lucius' life, even for the files. But he needed Severus right now, not the Aegis. He wanted the man who cuddled him and rocked him to sleep at night, and kissed him and brought him to completion in a haze of sweet satisfaction. When he looked at Severus now, all he saw was malice, a man made into a living shield for him.</p><p>"I am protecting you, Harry," Severus stated, as if it were natural to watch as a man lay dying.</p><p>"No, we need the files," Harry said, "We need him alive. Please, don't do this! Severus!"</p><p>Severus frowned, as if not comprehending why his bondmate was so distraught. He slowly pulled back on the bond, allow the winds to settle. Harry touched him lightly on the arm, "Don't leave me, Severus. I need you here with me, more than protection, more than anything."</p><p>Finally, finally, Severus shut his eyes and nodded. The silver snakes faded into mist and it was only the pitiful gurgling of blood in Lucius' throat that brought their attention back to the issue at hand.</p><p>"It is fixable," Severus sighed, casting obliviate and a stunning spell in quick succession. "I already made the potions we'd need…and Narcissa would kill me if I murdered her husband, no matter how different their politics may be."</p><p>Harry nodded. He wanted to know if there were potions for him, for his bruised backside and abused arse. Or if there was anything that would make him forget the way Severus heard his pleas and did nothing. <em>No mercy</em>…</p><p>"Here," Severus said, "Yours. I shall attend to Lucius."</p><p>Harry stared down at the potions in his hands, recognizing them as pain potions for different aches. He downed them, one after another, and then collapsed in the chair, watching through half lidded eyes as Lucius was healed, good as new, and sent on his way…</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. The Hint</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Dumbledore leaves a hint.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The files had arrived without ceremony a month later, attached to the leg of a giant horned owl with the official Ministry seal. Hermione had reached the owl first, untying the package and gasping at the weight of it. It seemed that Lucius hadn't <em>just</em> sent the files the Auror Department had on Jaggers and McCalister, but the top secret files from the Department of Mysteries as well. She had spent all day pouring over the documents, telling Harry and Severus that she would enlighten them that evening when Narcissa was scheduled to arrive.</p><p><em>Do you really think Dumbledore left us a hint?</em> Harry asked down the bond. It was as natural as speaking, and Harry found pleasure in the daily reminder that Severus was just as tied to him as he was to Severus.</p><p>Severus stopped in his dinner preparations, having decided that they would have lasagna for their strategy meeting. <em>It's likely.</em> He shut the over door and set the temperature with a flick of his wand. <em>However, that doesn't necessarily mean we'll understand it</em>.</p><p>Harry nodded. It would be just like Dumbledore to hide riddles within riddles, as if Harry had all the time in the world to decipher every minute detail—even less so if he had no help at all, as had almost been the case. Then again, Lucius probably read whatever he had sent along before sending it, so maybe being vague was simply a necessary precaution in times of war.</p><p><em>The package was fairly thick,</em> Severus continued. <em>I had asked Lucius only for the Auror files…it will be the Department of Mysteries records that will matter to us. Although, by your memory, you had no inkling that they were Unspeakables?</em></p><p>"No," Harry said aloud, but he wasn't entirely sure. Unspeakables didn't exactly go around and make themselves known, and Harry had been kept in the Department of Mysteries for days on end, and then for shorter stretches of time over the school year. How else would they have gotten access to that floor if not for being allowed? And then, there had been all those ritual rooms, where Harry's beaten body had been dragged…He couldn't remember half of them, but the wail of the dementor was loud in his ears. He shivered and pulled his cloak tighter around himself.</p><p>It was autumn now. The leaves had changed into their beautiful rustic gold and ruby shades, on time as far as seasons went, inching them ever closer to December. Harry was startled from his thoughts as Severus sat beside him at the kitchen table, and then reached over to pull Harry onto his lap. Harry happily allowed himself to be maneuvered, basking in the older man's warmth and apparent calm.</p><p>"Sickle for your thoughts?" Severus asked lowly, wrapping his arms securely around the younger man.</p><p>Harry sighed and shuffled a little bit closer. "It's almost winter and…I'm worried. Isn't the potion nearly finished?"</p><p>Severus stared out the window as the last rays of the sun were dipping below the horizon, casting the earth in goldenrod and reds. He leaned down and pressed a quick kiss to Harry's forehead, right above the infamous scar. His voice was soothing when he answered. "Nearly…"</p><p>His heart plummeted as the Aegis whispered in his ear, <em>He lies</em>. Did they truly stand no chance? Were they even now, taking on an impossible task? Harry bit his lip, wondering if he should bring up the lie. Severus was just trying to calm him, he was sure, but then, Severus had asked for his thoughts and he was still nervous, still concerned. Harry turned to look Severus in the eye, his voice devoid of any accusation. "The Aegis says you're lying. What's wrong, Severus? Is it…is it not even close?"</p><p>Severus' eyes were as calm as a still ocean, black and fathomless. Harry would have thought he were occluding, but Severus had to know that Harry was unable to use legilimency…</p><p>"I think it is time you learned that I have been creating two potions simultaneously." The Aegis pulsed that he was telling the truth. "One is for the removal of the Dark Mark. The other is for the removal of the horcrux."</p><p>Harry's breath caught in his throat at the confession, especially since Severus actually looked quite contrite. Harry wanted to say, <em>I know</em> in that way that said all was forgiven, but then he would leave himself vulnerable to such questions as, <em>How did you know?</em> And as much as Harry was unsettled by how many secrets Severus was keeping from him, Harry knew he had secrets of his own. Namely, one called Tom Riddle.</p><p>Was this how Dumbledore felt? So full of secrets he thought he might burst?</p><p>"The horcrux can be removed?" Harry asked as if he had never heard of such a thing before. "But how?"</p><p>"If you take the potion within the hour, then it will allow the soul to be transferred to the main body the way souls are usually transferred…with a kiss."</p><p>Harry stared at him hard. He wouldn't be able to get that close to Voldemort until their presumed bonding day, which was scheduled for Yule. Severus wasn't just pushing up against the deadline, he was relying on him to still be here until that day. Which meant that if Severus failed…that would be the end.</p><p>"The Dark Lord knows about the potion?" Harry asked slowly, using the term for Voldemort because it pleased Severus.</p><p>"It is the only one he knows about."</p><p>"So why tell me now? Why hide it?"</p><p>"Because," Severus looked away again, his fingers ghosting over the back of Harry's neck. "I didn't want to promise you life if I could not guarantee it…Albus once thought that the only way to remove a horcrux was to kill the host. I promised the Dark Lord an alternative, anything to save you, and yet, I didn't know if it was possible…I could not stand the thought of giving you hope, only to rip it away."</p><p>Harry bit his lip, moved by the admission. Life, hope, safety…Severus <em>cared</em>.</p><p>"Would you have killed me?" Harry asked softly, playing with the hem of Severus' robes. "If that was the only way to kill the Dark Lord?" He yearned to know. "If you hadn't learned about the bond, if you thought that the only way to be free yourself was to kill me, would you have?"</p><p>"It wouldn't have come done to that," Severus said, shaking his head.</p><p>"Why not?"</p><p>"Because," Severus cupped Harry's face with his hands and looked directly into his emerald eyes. "There is no victory if you are dead. Whether the Dark Lord lives or dies does not matter as much as knowing that <em>you</em> are alive."</p><p>Harry's eyelashes fluttered closed, dark against his skin. It felt so nice to be loved and prized. He could feel the possessiveness rolling off of Severus in dark waves and it made him feel safe, as no one ever had before. Albus had been willing to sacrifice him, no more than a pawn, knowing what he was and what he contained…Albus hadn't even told the truth about the Aegis or the fact that it could be transferred…But here, now, wrapped in Severus' warmth, he knew that Severus was telling the truth. He would keep Harry alive no matter the cost.</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Harry opened the door when Narcissa knocked. Hermione and Severus had set the table and were waiting in the dining room, Hermione's notes laid out in front of her.</p><p>"You look well, Harry," Narcissa said, her blue eyes flickering around the house as Harry led her further inside. It wasn't like she hadn't been here before, Harry thought with an internal roll of his eyes. No matter how helpful Severus thought she was, Harry would never be fully at ease with the beautiful witch in <em>his</em> territory.</p><p>"Severus takes good care of me," Harry returned, perhaps childishly, wanting to stake his claim.</p><p>She replied with a twinkling laugh that did not quite meet her eyes. "I imagine so."</p><p>Hermione beamed as Narcissa strode into the room. Harry couldn't quite comprehend how the two had become friends so easily after Hermione had been held prisoner at Malfoy Manor for so long, but then again, he imagined Hermione could say much the same about him.</p><p>"Ah," Narcissa said with a pointed look at the Ministry seals adorning the papers, "I thought I saw Lucius sneaking off to the owlry this morning."</p><p>"How<em> ever</em> does your marriage work, Narcissa, when you lead such separate lives?" Severus teased, serving Harry and himself some salad, roasted carrots, and lasagna.</p><p>"A healthy dose of secrecy," Narcissa said with a conspiratorial look at Harry. "And a healthy dose of trust…though, not necessarily in equal amounts."</p><p>"I'm just thankful you were able to obtain as many books as you have without arousing suspicion," Hermione sighed. "I wouldn't have been able to make a dent in anything if I didn't have those!"</p><p>"Think nothing of it," Narcissa smiled.</p><p>Throughout the dinner, Harry was aware of those icy blue eyes on him and Severus, taking in the way that Severus tilted his head to listen to him or give him a slight reassuring smile. He knew that Narcissa was an asset to their cause and wanted Voldemort gone as much as the rest of them, but she was a different kind of ally. Harry had no doubt in his mind that had Dumbledore asked her to kill him to destroy the horcrux, she would—if only to free Draco from Voldemort's clutches.</p><p>"So, what did the files say, Hermione?" Harry asked presently.</p><p>"They said a lot of things. Nonsense mostly," Hermione replied in her teacher voice. "However, there was a file placed in here about their being discharged from service, and then—" she riffled through her papers again, "—there was a record of whatever dangerous research they were working on without any sanction from the Ministry."</p><p>"You are saying that they weren't really Unspeakables?" Severus confirmed.</p><p>"That's right. It is only the nature of their discharge that falls under the Department of Mysteries' jurisdiction. You see…it says that Jaggers and McCalister were charged with using the Room of Sacrifice, a place of magical instability that had been closed off due to <em>accidents</em>."</p><p>No one noticed that Harry had gone rigid, his pulse rising with phantom fears.</p><p>"They were trying to open a portal to another world," Hermione continued, "According to Graham's Great Hypothesis, the combination of blood, sex, and soul magic could tear a hole in the fabric of time and space, with the help of a conduit. However, there was never any evidence that this could actually happen outside of theory, and the work was abandoned when each person chosen to hold open the portal died. It seems that these two aurors picked it up without anyone's knowledge."</p><p>"A pity Dumbledore has given us a series of failed experiments," Narcissa couldn't help but sneer. Even while helping defeat the Dark Lord, it was clear she was still not a big fan of Dumbledore's.</p><p>Hermione shook her head. "I thought so too, at first, but think about it. Harry, in that book you gave me, Salazar mentioned a component of the Aegis that could affect time, but didn't explain how. And then from the books Narcissa was able to get for me, I've been able to ascertain that <em>theoretically</em>, it is possible to manipulate space-time with an extremely strong bond. In Louis' Theory of Compression, bonds are ways that the universe can segment stretches of time together, so it is possible to travel to that point in time when the bond was first created, or right around there, but not too far away from that."</p><p>"But why would we want to do that, Hermione?" Harry asked. "Let's say, for the sake of argument, that the Aegis can send Severus and me back to my fifth year, when Dumbledore first invoked the Aegis, we'd have to go hunting all the horcruxes again. And who's to say we won't end up right back here without our memories?"</p><p>"Harry raises a fair point," Narcissa said.</p><p>"Right, well to address your first concern, this ritual involves soul magic, so although you're traveling to a different universe, the state of people's souls will remain the same because it sprouted from this one. You-Know-Who will have whatever soul pieces he absorbed in this world intact. Your second point is rather more difficult to answer…"</p><p>"What do you mean, Granger?" Severus snapped. "Will Harry and I remember our lives or not?"</p><p>Hermione looked like she wanted to refuse to answer, avoiding meeting Snape's eyes as she stared down at her papers. "You'll both remember…" Hermione said slowly, "But there is a slight chance that you won't end up in the same universe, and so the Harry you meet might be Harry from fifth year, not the Harry we know now."</p><p>"You're saying we could be separated," Harry breathed, his heart dropping. He immediately tried to catch Severus' eyes, but the man was avoiding his gaze, looking stricken.</p><p>Hermione nodded somberly. "In theory," she whispered. "Of course, we could choose to ignore this information all together. There's a chance that even if you thought it worth the risk and followed the steps outlined in their discontinued research, that it wouldn't work anyway."</p><p>"But you think it will?" Narcissa asked, her eyes gaining a sparkle of hope in them.</p><p>"Honestly? I do. Dumbledore left this here for a reason. I just…I have a feeling that the Aegis will be strong enough to pull you through…"</p><p>"But not together," Severus hissed.</p><p>"What does it matter, Severus, as long as you'll be with <em>a Harry Potter</em>, in whatever world you'll be in? You've despised him for longer," Narcissa said flippantly.</p><p>"It matters because <em>I will not lose him!</em>" Severus shouted. Why could they not understand that?</p><p>"Severus…" Harry gently touched the man's arm. "I won't leave you. There's a chance we'll be in the same world."</p><p>"Yes," Hermione said, nodding rapidly up and down. "There's a theory in here called the Rule of Two that suggests that it's easier to send two souls together through a portal than just one. But honestly, this entire thing might not even work. After all, there's no evidence that portals can be created. No one has ever seen one and no conduit has lived to tell the tale."</p><p>Harry stared down at his half-eaten lasagna, poking it with his fork. His stomach flip-flopped on him and he swallowed, gathering his Gryffindor courage. "Actually, there has," Harry whispered, but he might as well have shouted. All eyes snapped to his.</p><p>"Harry, what do you mean?" Hermione asked, her head cocked to the side. "I'm sure Dumbledore would have mentioned it if he had known…"</p><p>"But he didn't know," Harry said. "Didn't you ever wonder why we chose to look into <em>those</em> aurors?"</p><p>"Well, I just assumed Dumbledore had told you something."</p><p>"No," Harry shook his head and laughed bitterly. "No. It was because I was there when they opened the portal. It worked."</p><p>Narcissa sucked in a gasp as Hermione froze, stunned.</p><p>"Dumbledore invoked the Aegis in my fifth year because he needed to hide traumatic memories from me. He found out that the aurors he entrusted me to were abusing me, despite the fact I <em>begged </em>him to make it stop. One of the aurors held me down in the Room of Sacrifice and-and then the other one brought in this dementor, except it had been tortured and it was awful, I had never seen anything like it, and they had me cast the patronus charm on the dementor when it couldn't even <em>move</em>."</p><p>Tears were falling freely down Harry's cheeks now. He couldn't stop them as his grief overflowed with hate and anger and sadness. Severus' face was set in stone, Narcissa's thoughtful. "They didn't see anything, but I did. It felt like I was being ripped apart, but I was holding the portal open, and the dementor just went through it and then vanished. They thought the experiment had failed because it happened when time stood still, but I knew the truth…It's real. It can work."</p><p>Hermione wanted to hug Harry close to her chest, but Severus had sent her a death glare as he hugged the boy instead. It struck her then that Harry had never even told Severus this and that he had been intending to keep it locked up inside forever.</p><p>"I am so sorry," Hermione said. "I had no idea…"</p><p>Even Narcissa's eyes had gone less sharp as she gazed at him with something like kindness and pity, the way, Harry imagined, she might look at Draco.</p><p>"It will work," Harry repeated softly. "I know the power that's contained in the Aegis and I know how it feels to open a portal…I-I would be willing to do it again."</p><p>"You don't need to," Severus said forcefull, placing a finger to Harry's lips. "It is a sacrifice. No one can ask more of you."</p><p>"But what's the point of killing the Dark Lord now, in this world?" Harry asked. "The war has been lost. He controls Hogwarts and the Ministry…even if we were to win, what would be left for us?"</p><p><em>Me, you'd have me,</em> Severus thought to himself.</p><p>"And we've lost so many," Harry continued. "Ron and Dumbledore and S-Sirius and Remus and Hedwig and Dobby, and so many more…"</p><p>Narcissa couldn't help but think of her own life. Just last year, she had been able to exist as she pleased, taking care of Draco and throwing extravagant balls…now, she had to run a school. She hardly even saw Lucius anymore. He was always busy as the Minister, and even then, he was no more than the Dark Lord's puppet. He would spend the rest of his life hunting down each of the Dark Lord's political dissenters. And Draco…How much longer could he take at the Dark Lord's side? If she could do it all again…</p><p>"Of course I miss Ron," Hermione said, ignoring the way Severus glared at her, "But the choice is yours, Harry…and yours too Snape. You both need to be in complete agreement to call upon the bond's gift. If one of you doesn't fully want this to happen," and she tried not to let her gaze linger too long on Severus, "then it simply will not work."</p><p>Severus shut his eyes against the well of emotion threatening to overflow. He knew that Hermione and Narcissa wanted to reverse the way things had happened. They had loved ones and lost years they wanted to regain. But Severus? He could lose the one thing that had ever made him happy. He could end up in a universe where Harry might look at him with loathing, where the Aegis could exist between them, he and a perfect stranger, no more than a fifth-year boy, and of course, <em>that</em> Harry would resist every step of the way. He wanted the Harry who was beside him <em>now</em>.</p><p>How could they ask him to give that up?</p><p>"Severus?" Harry whispered, as if anything louder would shatter the man. "We can think on it. We don't need to decide right now."</p><p>But Severus could only nod. He didn't trust himself to speak.</p><p>"I should get going," Narcissa said finally, "You'll be visiting soon, I hope." Her question was addressed to Severus. The man nodded once, curtly. "Thank you Hermione, for your hard work. Thank you, Severus, Harry, for the meal."</p><p>Hermione saw her out. It was no secret what they were discussing before the wards rippled to indicate Narcissa had finally left and apparated away. If they didn't pursue the portal, what alternative options did they have?</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>"I won't lose you," Severus murmured into Harry's hair that night, when it was clear that Harry had fallen asleep. He was curled around Harry's side, knowing it always made Harry smile and snuggle closer. He was the protector and Harry his protected, just the way it was always meant to be.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0026"><h2>26. Persephone</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Severus speaks with Albus again.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Severus watched as Harry played with tiny white owl, allowing it to nip at his fingers affectionately. Unlike with Moody's eyeball, which Severus had been able to sequester away, Harry wouldn't allow Severus anywhere near <em>Persephone</em>, as the Dark Lord has named her, and guarded her fiercely whenever Severus was around.</p><p>"She's just an innocent bird," Harry had said when he read through the letter and gazed wonderingly at the little owl which had delivered it. "You can't hurt her!"</p><p>Severus had reluctantly conceded that point, after performing several spells upon the creature to make sure it wasn't an animagus in disguise. Apparently, the Dark Lord felt a little remorseful that Hedwig had died, though how he had even <em>known</em> that fact was beyond Severus. Attached to the bird's leg was a small scroll.</p><p>
  <strong>With the presentation of this second courting gift, I formally present my proposal of marriage to Harry James Potter. By Yule, I expect a reply by your owl, Persephone.</strong>
</p><p>The amount of adoration the boy showed to the owl was a little baffling. It was just an owl. If he wanted one so badly, he might have told Severus. Perhaps then, Harry might have gotten to name the creature. <em>Persephone</em>. Did Harry even understand the message the Dark Lord was sending him? Or was that pleasure just for Severus? A taunt. A challenge. The Dark Lord was claiming Harry as his.</p><p><em>But what's so wrong about that?</em> the Aegis asked him. <em>Once you kill the Dark Lord, I will dissolve, leaving but a scar upon your skin. Don't you want to stay with Harry forever?</em></p><p>And Severus did. He sipped his coffee and continued to watch Harry play with the owl, his face one of pure delight. He would do anything to be with Harry. He would even jump across space and time for him, if there was such a guarantee that they wouldn't be separated, torn into different dimensions. He would do anything to keep him safe, loved, and protected…but did that have to mean the Dark Lord had to die for that to be true?</p><p>The Dark Lord wanted to make Harry his co-ruler, his <em>equal</em>. He didn't desire the boy's death, horcrux or no horcrux. He had exacted justice for Harry, had gifted him an owl…</p><p>
  <em>"Why run when you could be safe and cherished for your talents beside the co-ruler of the new world? I would much rather you put your devotion to good use. Become my Harry's bodyguard, his shadow, his companion. I shall not interfere. He will know by that time that he is mine."</em>
</p><p>It was a second before Severus realized that someone was watching him, but it wasn't Harry.</p><p>"Sir?" Hermione asked, holding out a letter to him. "Narcissa just sent this. The owl's still waiting in the kitchen for a reply."</p><p>Severus took the letter from her and frowned. "I wasn't planning on visiting Hogwarts until the end of the month."</p><p>Hermione glanced at Harry, her features softening just a bit, before turning back around. "I know, Snape, but Narcissa has to meet with the parents of the boy the Carrows murdered and she can't ask them to reschedule for a second time."</p><p>With a sigh, Severus summoned his parchment and quill and scribbled out a quick reply. "Thank you, Granger."</p><p>Hermione looked down at the parchment and gave a quick nod. It said that he would meet with her at the end of the week. The girl disappeared into the kitchen, no doubt feeding the Malfoy's owl some of the owl biscuits Harry had badgered him into making with him, before returning.</p><p>"Cease your staring, Granger," Severus snapped when he couldn't ignore her any longer. "Do I look any different to you?"</p><p>"For a second, your eyes…" Hermione shook her head, as if to clear it, "Trick of the light, I suppose."</p><p>"Or extreme stress," Severus sighed, then gestured to the couch next to his chair. "You might as well sit if you're just going to watch me watch Harry."</p><p>That made Hermione break out into a smile. "I can't believe You-Know-Who got Harry an owl," Hermione said. They were far enough away that Harry couldn't hear them, but they could clearly see the delight on his face as owl hopped around on the floor. "You know, he never did get over Hedwig. Hagrid had bought her for him on his first trip to Diagon Alley, his first friend, really."</p><p>"You would think then, that the Dark Lord would have the sense to not remind Harry why Harry should hate him so much. It is, after all, why the bird is dead now."</p><p>Hermione shook her head softly. "Did you ask Harry what the meaning was?"</p><p>"It's perfectly obvious," Severus said with disdain, "Harry has been captured by the Underworld and will now rule it if he so chooses. <em>Persephone</em>."</p><p>"I'm aware of the myth, Snape," Hermione cut in. "But the eye could have been obvious too, right? You would have thought it meant that You-Know-Who was watching you, but in reality, it had a much more personal meaning."</p><p><em>Always the know-it-all</em>. "Fine," Severus said, crossing his arms. "Enlighten me."</p><p>"The Dark Lord is promising Harry <em>family</em>."</p><p>"He what?" Severus jolted back. "It's just a blasted bird."</p><p>"Yes," Hermione nodded patiently, a much kinder teacher than Snape had ever been. "But remember, Hedwig was like Harry's family, and while You-Know-Who didn't directly kill Hedwig the way he did Harry's parents, it was because of him that she died."</p><p>"You can't replace family," Severus scoffed.</p><p>"No, but you can build a new one," Hermione said. "It's a powerful lure. Harry's always wanted a family."</p><p><em>And why should he not have one?</em> the Aegis whispered. <em>You and the Dark Lord would be his family. He would be protected and loved above all others…You could keep the Aegis bond between you, never broken, tied together forever…</em></p><p>"Snape?" Hermione asked, "Did that make any sense? Snape?"</p><p>"Ah, yes," Severus said, shutting his eyes for a second. "I understand now."</p><p>"So you see that you would be playing right into You-Know-Who's hands if you were to kill that owl, right?" Hermione said slowly. "Because you look like you're jealous of the poor thing."</p><p>Granger was right. Severus felt foolish. If that bird had an accident or flew out the window one morning, Severus would be responsible for taking away Harry's <em>family</em>, one the Dark Lord so graciously offered the boy.</p><p>"Ten points to Gryffindor."</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>It was the end of the week.</p><p>Severus glanced around his laboratory, making sure all of his potions were in order, neatly labeled, and put away. Only two were in unlabeled crystal vials, shimmering like the depths of the ocean and the dawn above a lake…One to remove the Dark Mark, the other to remove the horcrux, enough that they would be able to run, if need be, abandoning the plan to jump worlds altogether…but why run? Why hide?</p><p><em>Why indeed?</em> the Aegis hissed. <em>The boy is safer here than in any safe house.</em></p><p>Severus found himself agreeing. He locked up the cabinets with the strongest wards he knew and walked up the stairs.</p><p>"You're leaving now?" Harry asked him, looking up from his game of chess with Hermione. "I thought you weren't visiting Hogwarts for another month?"</p><p>"Narcissa had to reschedule," Hermione said gently, before Severus could interject. She gave Harry a soft, reassuring smile.</p><p>"Indeed," Severus said with a dip of his head. "I'll be back soon. Do try to keep your blasted owl away from my laboratory. The last thing we need is for an owl feather to drop into my potions." It had been Granger who had rushed into his lab to grab the little owl earlier in the week, Harry hot at her heels, snatching the little bird like a snitch out of the air.</p><p>"She'll be very well-behaved, I promised," Harry said with a grin, getting up from the table to bestow a hug on the man, dressed head-to-toe in black. His emerald eyes shone as he gazed up at him, then he pressed a kiss to his cheek.</p><p>"Are you going to let me leave?" Severus asked with exaggerated exasperation, "Or are you going to paw at me all day?"</p><p>Harry laughed a bit. "The Aegis just feels a little different," he admitted shyly. "I don't know what's wrong with it. Usually, it's so quiet the morning after we—erm, um, sorry Hermione."</p><p>"It's probably nothing to worry about," Hermione said, not lifting her eyes from the chess board.</p><p>"Everything will be alright," Severus said, pressing one last kiss of his own against Harry's soft lips. "<em>Trust me</em>."</p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>The door to the headmistress's office clicked shut behind Narcissa, leaving Severus and the portrait alone again. He could still hear the quiet click of Narcissa's heels upon the stone floors, echoing away and down the stairs.</p><p>Albus' blue eyes were sharp as he regarded Severus, devoid of their usual twinkle. It made Severus wonder if Narcissa had perhaps <em>said something</em> to the headmaster about his relationship with Harry, but then, whose fault was that? It had not been Severus who had invoked the Aegis with a mere schoolboy.</p><p>"Narcissa tells me that you and Harry are now bonded," Albus said, and his voice was cold. "I expected better of you, Severus. Was I not clear enough?"</p><p>"Perfectly," Severus said, his own fury making his words tight and cutting. "But now we are bonded. There is no use bemoaning the past, Albus." He held out his arm, pulling up his sleeve so that the silver mark caught the light.</p><p>"But Severus, what of the future?"</p><p>"What of the future?" Severus snapped, raising an eyebrow. "You wanted me to keep the boy safe. I am. He will be far safer now with me than anyone else in this world. Do you object?"</p><p>"That depends," Albus said slowly. "Are you planning on telling Harry that you've completed the potions necessary to leave Lord Voldemort?"</p><p><em>How? </em>Severus bit his tongue to keep from cursing. It must have been Granger. It had to be. She had been in the lab that day, chasing that owl. Harry wouldn't have known what a finished potion looked like, the faint sheen across the surface, the way it moved…Who knew what else Granger had told Narcissa? "If we pursue the plan that we have developed, where we defeat the Dark Lord in a prior time, then of course Albus. I must explain the potions are finished."</p><p>"And are you planning on pursuing that plan, Severus?" Albus asked, peering at him over his half-moon spectacles, his entire body, painted though it was, radiating the tension of a coming storm. "Because Lord Voldemort can be very tempting when he wants to be, and you have fallen for his promises once before."</p><p><em>He knew</em>. In self-defense, the Aegis coiled around him, making his eyes flash silver. Who was Albus to tell him the proper way to take care of his bonded one? He would protect Harry. He had a plan to keep them both safe, forever.</p><p>"I plan to keep Harry safe," Severus snarled.</p><p>Albus sighed heavily, bringing the full weight of his disappointment upon him. "I showed you mercy, Severus."</p><p>"And sent me back to a madman!"</p><p>"Which you seem now all too happy to do!" Albus thundered, standing up from his chair, as if he could walk out of the frame altogether. But of course, he couldn't.</p><p>Severus' lip curled. "Things changed."</p><p>"Tell me what he has promised you, Severus," Albus asked, shaking his head as if he could not believe how naïve Severus could be after all these years. "Tell me, what empty promises has he spoken to you?"</p><p>"He has promised to keep Harry safe," Severus said, and delighted in the shock that came over Albus' features. "He has proposed to Harry and intends to make him his <em>equal</em>, and I? I shall be by Harry's side, <em>always</em>."</p><p>"No," Albus gasped. "You don't really want this, Severus! Listen to me! I forbid you! You must place Harry's safety above your own!"</p><p>"Actually headmaster," Severus drawled, "I have! Everything I've ever done since he's been entrusted to my care was to keep him safe. I didn't even take him until he begged me for it! You wouldn't have gone that far to protect the boy!"</p><p>"I died for him!" Albus protested.</p><p>"After neglecting him for years after subjecting him to torture!" Severus yelled, and sparks shot out the end of his wand. "Did you know, headmaster," Severus began in low, dangerous voice, "that the Dark Lord gave the eye of Mad-Eye Moody to Harry as a courting gift? <em>Oh yes,</em> we both know what you did! You were the one who broke him Albus! Not I! Not any of the Dark Lord's most trusted inner circle! But you! You allowed him to be tortured by those men, and then what did you do? You bind him to you and obliviate him!"</p><p>Albus sat back down into his chair, his face falling. "I thought my death would set him free…" he said.</p><p>"And so it did! He's never been freer in <em>my</em> care. You only died for him, Albus. But I? I am able to <em>love</em> him. That's the greatest power in the world after all, isn't it Albus?" Severus mocked. His head was spinning. Finally, the great Albus Dumbledore had to look a failure in its ugly face and see the truth. Severus was swept up in the emotion, and did not notice exactly when Albus had stopped looking quite so contrite.</p><p>"And when he realizes you lied?" Albus said in a soft voice. "When Harry realizes that you had finished the potions all along and could have escaped Voldemort's hold, what then? Will Harry still love you?" His words were poison in Severus' ears. Of course, Harry would love him and forgive him. But Albus continued, "Harry is a very damaged individual, Severus. He doesn't know the meaning of love and doesn't fully understand that love isn't possession."</p><p>"He loves me," Severus said adamantly, "He told me so."</p><p>Albus nodded with a pitying look in his gaze as if that proved his point. After all, who could ever love Severus?</p><p>"Don't you ever wonder when Voldemort will dispose of you?" Albus asked, sowing more doubt in Severus' mind. He couldn't believe that he had ever regarded this man as his mentor. The words were biting and cruel, as if everything he said was designed to incite, to keep him distracted, to hold him here…</p><p>"He would never dispose of me!" Severus found himself protesting. "Not when I delivered him Harry Potter!"</p><p>"But if Harry Potter escaped?" Albus asked, and the twinkle was back in his eye with full force.</p><p>"He wouldn't," Severus sneered. "He loves me."</p><p>"Ah, but we had already discussed he doesn't understand the meaning of love…And I suspect you never did either. Where did I go wrong, Severus, that you feel only by caging him that you will keep him?"</p><p>It was at that moment, that Severus heard a siren in the back of his mind. <em>The wards</em>. His eyes widened and he stumbled back. Impossible! He looked up at Albus with fear for the first time and was met with that damnable twinkle.</p><p>"WHAT DID YOU DO?" Severus screamed, his magic exploding erratically, blasting apart the vase full of daffodils, the water spilling to the floor.</p><p>"What I had to," Albus said gravely, just as the Dark Mark began to burn, becoming as hot as the day it had been branded into his skin. "For the Greater Good."</p><p>He tried reaching for Harry across the bond, but the warm, loving presence was gone, the bond stretching out into darkness. And then the Dark Mark was pulling him away…</p><p>.oOo.</p><p>Severus hurried into the throne room of Riddle Manor, his black robes billowing behind him. The inner circle was in attendance today, so that they made a semicircle around the front of the room. They allowed him to pass, revealing a body upon a ground, but Severus didn't have time to spare it more than a glance before he was kneeling.</p><p>"My lord," Severus fell to the ground before the Dark Lord, keeping his head lowered as his heart hammered in his chest.</p><p>"Am I, Severus?" Voldemort asked. "Am I truly your lord and master?"</p><p>Severus raised his head then, quickly taking in the scene. There, in a lifeless heap, was Narcissa Malfoy, her radiant blonde hair splayed out, covering her face from view. Lucius stood as still as a statue beside her, his face unreadable, even as he gazed upon Severus, perhaps thinking that Snape would soon join her.</p><p>"I serve no other but you," Severus heard himself saying. His voice was not as steady as he wished it to be. "Please, my lord, I serve no one else but you!" He had to stay alive to find Harry again…Where could Narcissa have taken him? Grimmauld Place? Shell Cottage? The manor in Ireland? Surely the Order had retreated to one of the safe houses by now.</p><p>"<em>Crucio!"</em></p><p>The pain tore through him, rivaling the burn of the Dark Mark that had yet to cease its assault. Severus' nails dug into the palm of his hand, willing himself to stay silent.</p><p>"I do not regret the loss of Narcissa, but I did not intend to kill her," Voldemort said softly. "Her mind broke under the power of my legilimency as she tried to hide your treachery from me. She was driven by <em>love</em>, of course, to rescue her only child. But what use have you for the boy, Severus? I have promised him to you, have I not? You could have been beside him until the day you drew your last breath, and yet, you have helped him to <em>escape</em>."</p><p>"No, my lord!" Severus gasped. But what could he say? That this was outdated news? That he had <em>changed his plans</em>?</p><p>The Dark Lord regarded him with nothing but fury in his red eyes. "I will enjoy picking you apart bone by bone, my alchemist. It is fortunate, is it not, that you have finished the potion to join my last horcrux to me? I no longer require your services, how <em>considerate</em> of you." He raised his wand high above his head, the power clear in the air—</p><p>"Stop!" Severus screamed, and he was ashamed to feel that there were tears in his eyes. "I can get him back! Please, my lord!"</p><p>"<em>LIES!"</em> Voldemort hissed. "When will you realize, Severus, that you have been lying to everyone, including yourself? <em>Avada K-</em>"</p><p>There was no time to think, no time to plan. All Severus knew was that he could not allow himself to be killed, not without seeing Harry's emerald eyes for the last time.</p><p>"I hold Harry Potter's Aegis, my lord!" Severus shouted, stunning the Dark Lord into silence. He wasn't even sure if the Dark Lord knew what the Aegis was, but by the narrowing of his eyes, it seemed that he did. "I can—I can bring him back! Please, my lord, I promise you, I can find him! I can find him! I can find him!"</p><p>He knew he was babbling, knew that Lucius was watching from the crowd with eyes as cold as ice, knew that he resembled every hapless victim before the Dark Lord begging for their lives, despite the number of times he had promised himself he would not look like them in the last moments of his own. "<em>Please</em>…" Severus begged, his tears covering his face, knowing the last time he had truly begged was in the headmaster's office, several years ago.</p><p>"If you are truly the boy's bonded," Voldemort hissed, "Then perhaps I have one last use for you after all…"</p>
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<a name="section0027"><h2>27. Narcissa in Bloom</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Harry is rescued.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry watched Severus reach the apparation point before popping away. It was only for a little while, he knew, and yet, his heart was heavy. "I miss him already," he sighed, turning back to the room. "I know I sound pathetic, Hermione, but whenever he's gone, I just can't stop worrying until he comes back."</p><p>Hermione gave him an unreadable look. "That's natural for someone in your position," she said, "Someone who's been made to rely on someone else. But you're your own person, Harry. You don't <em>need</em> Snape."</p><p>Harry looked at her sharply. Beneath her calm demeaner, he caught just a hint of bitterness in her tone, like a flash of a knife. He blinked in surprise. "I thought you two were getting on better now," he said slowly.</p><p>"We are," Hermione said, not lifting her eyes from the chessboard and moving her bishop to take his pawn. "It's just, well Harry, you shouldn't <em>like</em> being in captivity."</p><p>"I'm hardly in captivity," Harry said.</p><p>"When's the last time you've been outside the house? And no, Harry, the garden doesn't count."</p><p>Harry frowned. "But I'm happy here. Severus cares for me. You've seen how he treats me, right Hermione? He never forces me to do anything."</p><p>"Exactly, you're both <em>too happy</em> here."</p><p>"Hermione, I know you think Severus isn't on board with opening up the portal, but he is! We talked about it last night. He promised me he'd do it. As soon as the potions are ready, he'll be able to summon the Dark Lord, I'll transfer the horcrux, and we'll go back in time, just like that."</p><p>"But the potions <em>are</em> done, Harry."</p><p>"No, they're not," Harry said with a shake of his head. "Severus would have said so."</p><p>"They were finished days ago. Perhaps even before that."</p><p>"But he would have said something," Harry insisted, but he sounded unconvincing even to his own ears.</p><p>"Would he have?"</p><p>"You don't know Severus like I do," Harry retorted, growing frustrated. "Yeah, he may be manipulative at times and bend the truth a bit, but he's only doing it for my own good. It's not like I haven't kept secrets from him!"</p><p>Hermione looked up, alarmed. "Harry, calm down! I'm not saying he's, that he's being cruel on purpose or anything. I think it's the Aegis, Harry. You have to admit, he acts differently sometimes. You said that Snape refused to touch you for months when you first got here, right? No matter how much you bothered him, he refused to give in. By the time I arrived, he couldn't keep his hands off you. Harry, you can't ignore that!"</p><p>"Yeah, the Aegis changed him. I <em>know </em>that. But that's Dumbledore's fault, not ours! I have to trust that Severus has a plan to keep us both alive. I've trusted him this far, and I'm still alive, aren't I?"</p><p>"Yes, but—" Hermione's indignant rebuttal was cut off by an elegant voice from the doorway.</p><p>"Ah, Harry, Hermione! I hope I'm not interrupting?" Narcissa smiled at them both, dressed in fine blue robes that matched her eyes. The eyes that were sharp and calculating, taking in the scene.</p><p>"Where's Severus?" Harry asked cautiously. "I thought he was supposed to be at Hogwarts with you?"</p><p>"He wanted to talk with the headmaster in private," Narcissa sighed, flicking some invisible dandruff from her robes. "He said that I should bring you to Malfoy Manor in the meantime for our strategy meeting."</p><p>Hermione stood up, reaching over to tug Harry up by his arm. "Come on, Harry."</p><p>But Harry didn't move. "I'm not supposed to leave the house," Harry said slowly. "I thought you would know that, Narcissa."</p><p>"Not normally, no, but I'm escorting you," Narcissa returned.</p><p>Their eyes locked.</p><p>"<em>Harry</em>," Hermione said, tugging on Harry's hands plaintively. "We should go."</p><p>"No." Harry shook his head and started backing away from the two women. "I'm not leaving." He reached for the bond in the back of his mind, its power weakened by distance.</p><p>Hermione gasped. "He's calling through the bond!"</p><p>"<em>Stupefy!" </em>Narcissa cried.</p><p>But Harry was ready. He ducked behind the couch, and then made a mad dash for the stairs.</p><p>"<em>Stupefy! Stupefy!" </em>Narcissa was fast behind him. "I will not lose Draco because of you!" she screamed.</p><p>Harry ran into his and Severus' bedroom and found Persephone locked in her cage. He thrust open the window and all but dumped her out. He knew that Narcissa would probably kill her, not wanting to take any chances that the owl would be able to track them to their new location. Persephone didn't deserve that… "Find Severus, girl!" he whispered.</p><p>"<em>Alohomora!" </em>Narcissa burst into the room, Hermione beside her. "<em>Stupefy!"</em></p><p>The stunning spell hit its target and Harry went toppling to the floor. "Good, we don't have much tim—" Narcissa said, just as they felt the wards shudder and groan. "Take the portkey," Narcissa ordered, thrusting a small pocket watch into Hermione's hands.</p><p>"What, no! You have to come with us!"</p><p>"Take it!" Narcissa hissed, whirling around, wand aimed at the door.</p><p>Hermione ran to Harry's side, wrapping her arms around his waist so that she wouldn't lose him when the portkey activated. "What's the password?" Hermione shouted, above the roaring wind that threatened to tear the house apart.</p><p>"<em>Dragon</em>."</p><p>And then Hermione and Harry were <em>gone</em>.</p><p>"My lord," Narcissa said, her eyes full of malice. "You're too late."</p><p>The Dark Lord stood before her, his magic suffocating her, pressing in on all sides. His red eyes flashed. "<em>Legilimens!"</em></p><p>-o-o-o-</p><p>Harry was pulled out of his vision with a pounding headache, the voices in the room growing louder…oppressively loud. He tried to focus on the voices now…anything to forget the way that Narcissa had bled out onto the stone floor, defiant till her very last breath.</p><p>"Why was he stunned, Hermione?"</p><p>"Were you attacked? Was it You-Know-Who?"</p><p>"Where was he being held?"</p><p>"Did Snape try to stop you?"</p><p>
  <em>"Where's my mother, Granger?"</em>
</p><p>It was this last question that made Harry open his emerald green eyes and look around the room. Draco Malfoy sat on a plain black kitchen chair, wrapped in a towel for modesty, surrounded by the last vestiges of the Order of the Phoenix. From left to right, Harry spotted Arthur, Molly, Fred, George, Bill, Fleur, Tonks, Remus, Minerva, and Kingsley. He wondered if the missing Weasleys were simply elsewhere, rather than dead, and with a pang, thought briefly of Ginny.</p><p>Tonks, Bill, and Shacklebolt had blood on their clothes, leaving no room to doubt who exactly had gone into Riddle Manor to fish out Draco. Harry shut his eyes again. Voldemort had made a misstep in trying to use the Malfoys against one another and this was the result. Narcissa had bargained with the Order to save her son, using him as the bargaining chip. She had to have known the risks.</p><p>Hermione's voice trembled as she answered beside Harry. "She gave us the portkey and…someone had crossed the wards. I don't know who, but she stayed to make sure we could escape."</p><p>Draco let out an inhumane growl and his hand shot out, "Well, you heard her. Go and get her then!"</p><p>"Mr. Malfoy," Minerva said gravely, "I understand that you're distraught, but even if we knew where exactly the house was, I'm afraid the risk is too high."</p><p>"But not too high for Potter," Draco spat.</p><p>"Again, Narcissa insisted in keeping the location of the house to herself," Minerva said, still a little angry at how the witch had held that information over their heads.</p><p>"So what? You're just going to let her die? She gave you Potter!"</p><p>"In return for you," Kingsley said, and his voice filled the house with its authority. "Otherwise, make no mistake, we would have left you there."</p><p>Draco's silver eyes blazed, but then he caught sight of something that made him go still. "Harry," he pleaded, and the entire room shifted to look at Harry, still propped up on the couch. Before then, no one had noticed that he was awake. "Please, you must know where it is. After everything I've done for you…" Everyone stiffened at that, wondering if Harry did indeed owe Malfoy a favor and just how big it would be.</p><p>Harry slowly shook his head. "Draco…she's gone. The Dark Lord killed her."</p><p>"You can't know that!" Draco denied.</p><p>"I can," Harry cut him off, his voice soft and laced with sadness. "I witnessed it." He tapped his scar with his finger, and finally, Draco seemed to understand, slumping forward in his seat. With a cry, Draco ran from the room and up the stairs. They could hear the water running in the bathroom on the second floor, followed by vomiting.</p><p>"I'll look after 'im," Fleur said quietly. She knew all too well the grief of losing someone close. Her sister had been brutally murdered by Greyback in the last raid, and she didn't wish for Draco to go through that grief alone.</p><p>That seemed to break some sort of spell, since now everyone was coming up to Harry, their eyes full of hope and brimming with questions.</p><p>"Harry?" Molly asked, tears in her eyes, "Oh, Harry, dear!" She rushed across the room and wrapped him in her arms. "You look, oh, you look well, dear!"</p><p>"Thanks, Mrs. Weasley," Harry grinned. He hadn't wanted to leave Severus, but he had missed this, this warmth and loving care, this affection that was so far from sexual. "Severus is a surprisingly good cook." He didn't miss the ripple of unease that his statement caused, and wondered just how much Narcissa had told them.</p><p>"It's good to have you back, Harry, and you too, Hermione!" Fred piped up, ignoring the odd atmosphere in the room.</p><p>"Yeah, only took us about a year!" George said. "Of course, it would have been faster if we'd known the greasy git was a traitor twice over!"</p><p>"Or three times? Or four times?" Fred asked. "Hard to keep count!"</p><p>"Boys!" Arthur yelled, batting them away from Harry to give him a hug of his own. "What's done is done. What matters is that Harry and Hermione…and Draco are safe now."</p><p>Harry tried to return the smile, but he found that he couldn't, not fully. "S-Severus knew about this?" he asked shakily, dreading the answer.</p><p>"Well, he did," Arthur said with a frown. "Planned it out actually with Narcissa in the beginning."</p><p><em>Another secret that had been kept from him</em>.</p><p>"That was before we realized he was working with You-Know-Who all along to draw us out into the open," Tonks said bitterly.</p><p>Harry frowned at that. Surely Severus would have been able to do that much earlier by using him as bait if that had been his aim. What Tonks had proposed just didn't sound like him. "Are you sure Narcissa didn't just say that to make you move faster?" Harry asked.</p><p>He watched Tonks eyes flicker with doubt before turning away. <em>Aha</em>.</p><p>"Are you saying you didn't want us to move faster, Harry?" Remus asked with concern.</p><p>Harry met his eyes. "I—"</p><p>"Of course, he's not!" Hermione said quickly. "We're just tired, is all. We're very, very grateful for all of your hard work, everyone."</p><p>That put a smile on everyone's faces again.</p><p>"Well, Mr. Potter, Miss Granger," Minerva stepped forward, "Why don't you two get settled in? I imagine it's been a very exciting day and you could use the rest. We'll reconvene at dinner."</p><p>"That sounds wonderful," Hermione beamed, taking Harry's hand firmly in hers.</p><p>"You can follow me," Remus said mildly, "I was just about to head upstairs myself."</p><p>Harry followed Hermione and Remus in a daze, unsure of his own emotions that were broiling inside of him. Part of him still felt unbelievably angry at Hermione for bringing him here, but he <em>had</em> missed everyone, what left of everyone there was. And it gave him a chance to clear his mind for a little bit, the influence of the Aegis growing weaker with distance. For the first time in a long time, he felt that he could breathe.</p><p>Remus led Hermione to the room that she would share with Fleur and Tonks, indicating which drawer held spare clothes for her to wear. Then Remus and Harry continued down the hallway, the werewolf's back stiff, as if he wasn't entirely comfortable in Harry's presence.</p><p>"We know about the bond," Remus spoke suddenly, turning to lean against the wall and look at him. "Not all of us. Just Minerva, Kingsley, Bill, and me."</p><p>Harry nodded, feeling dazed.</p><p>"I know what a bond feels like, Harry. Werewolves have something similar, tying the pack together. I know that…that the bond probably wants you to return to him, but you cannot allow it to rule your life. Severus made his choice. You need to make yours."</p><p>"Everyone seems ready to condemn him, Remus. Has it occurred to you that maybe Severus had a larger plan?"</p><p>Remus snorted, "Of that, I have no doubt. What worries me is whether it included you or not living a happy, healthy life."</p><p>"I was happy <em>there</em>," Harry said softly.</p><p>"And when your year was up?" Remus asked. "I know Severus. Have known him longer than you've been alive, even. Nothing short of a bond could have made him throw his sacrifices out the window. It had to end, Harry. That pretend world he built for you needed to end before Yule and it seemed he wasn't ready."</p><p>"It wasn't pretend," Harry protested, "Remus, please believe me, whatever it was, was real. Just because it was short-lived doesn't make it any less real."</p><p>"Albus told Minerva what he said, Harry. He was planning on allowing You-Know-Who to wed you. Does that sound like freedom to you?"</p><p>Harry turned his face away. <em>It sounded like family</em>. And his heart ached, because he wished for family dearly, but really only wanted Severus. The thought of actually being with Voldemort that way just made his skin crawl. Perhaps if he were more like Tom...</p><p>"If I wanted to leave, would you let me?" Harry asked instead, his voice steady.</p><p>"What? Harry, we just got you back!" Remus cried, looking like his soul had been crushed. "We can't let you go back to him! It isn't safe!"</p><p>"Does that sound like freedom to you?" he parroted, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms. "You asked me if I really wanted to be rescued before, but you already knew the answer, didn't you? You saw how I came here. Narcissa stunned me because I didn't trust her."</p><p>Remus swallowed, actually looking personally offended. "So you really wish to return to Severus then? Even knowing that it's the bond causing you to feel this way and that it's not really real."</p><p>"It <em>is </em>real," Harry insisted, "And I don't want, I <em>need</em> to return to him, or did you just think that the Dark Lord was going to give him a slap on the wrist?"</p><p>"Severus is clever. He'll think of something," Remus said, waving his hand, but he looked a little ill all the same.</p><p>"And if he doesn't?" Harry pressed. "I think the bond will drive me mad."</p><p>"Enslavement bonds break when someone dies—"</p><p>"It isn't an enslavement bond," Harry interrupted, an odd look coming into his eyes as he regarded the werewolf. "You don't know what kind of bond this is, do you?"</p><p>"I assume You-Know-Who forced you two to bond. That's all I need to know to know this isn't good."</p><p>Harry shook his head. He could feel the maniacal laughter threatening to spill from his lips. "It's a protection bond," he said, "and it thrives on physical contact, <em>sexual intimacy</em>."</p><p>Remus sputtered.</p><p>"And it was first invoked by Dumbledore."</p><p>"What!" Remus nearly jumped. "That's impossible. Dumbledore is dead!"</p><p>"It was invoked in my fifth year," Harry said to Remus' growing horror. "And no, Dumbledore did not consummate the bond with me. He merely left it open so that when the time was right, it found someone else to cling to."</p><p>"Merlin, Harry…but that still doesn't mean Severus wouldn't betray you…" Although now, Remus didn't look so sure. "Has he hurt you?"</p><p>"Never," Harry lied.</p><p>Remus shifted his weight from foot to foot. He hadn't known what kind of bond it was, but now that he did, Remus was beginning to wonder if extracting Harry was such a good idea if they couldn't also extract Severus. He had heard about protection bonds before, and the price of the protection was often steep, too steep. Most required some sort of sacrifice, whether in blood, sex, or life. Separating a bonded pair in such an arrangement could spell disaster if the bond interpreted it as an unwillingness to fulfill the terms of payment.</p><p>"We can try and save Severus, bring him here," Remus offered half-heartedly, already knowing they didn't have the numbers to pull off another rescue mission. "We didn't know. Narcissa didn't tell us what kind of bond it was."</p><p>"And then what?" Harry asked steadily. "Chain him up? Sedate him? And then let us fuck every night?"</p><p>"That often?" Remus balked. "Right, none of my business. I…I think I need to tell Minerva now…about the bond, I mean."</p><p>"Go ask Hermione," Harry said tiredly. "Severus had her looking into it. She's an expert on it by now and she'd be <em>more than happy</em> to tell Minerva everything." The hurt in his voice was clear.</p><p>"She was just looking out for you," Remus said softly. When Harry didn't answer, Remus gestured to the door on the left. "You'll share this room with Fred, George, and Draco. It's a little crowded, but not any more than the Gryffindor dorms." Remus tried to give him a small smile, but Harry wasn't in the mood for a walk down memory lane.</p><p>"Right, thanks," Harry said tiredly. He watched Remus turn away before he walked into the room and fell onto one of the freshly made beds, sinking into the mattress.</p><p>How much betrayal could a soul take? he wondered. Severus had scoffed at him when he had first suggested escaping to the Order, and now, Harry had come to find that this had been his backup plan all along—or one of them at least.</p><p>He wondered if there was any truth to Remus' statement that Severus would really allow him to marry the Dark Lord. He was sure there wouldn't really be a choice involved, but if there were, he knew that Severus' possessive streak would certainly rebel against the idea…that didn't mean he wouldn't do it, especially if he felt cornered by the prospect of opening a portal where they could lose each other to space and time.</p><p>Harry hugged himself tightly around the waist. He needed time. Time to think. It was like chess, but a speed round so that each move was fluid and nearly automatic. He wondered if Severus was alright, but each time he felt for the bond, he could only get a faint impression that Severus was still alive but in pain. He wanted to make sure Severus was safe, but he was reluctant to think about immediate escape from the Order. Because Severus had lied, more than once, about many things.</p><p>
  <em>Would he truly be better off with Severus? With the Dark Lord? With the Order?</em>
</p><p>He would hear what the Order had to say at dinner and think it over. If Severus wasn't dead yet, it was likely he wouldn't be tomorrow morning, and it wasn't like the Order was going anywhere.</p><p>With that small decision made, Harry allowed himself to relax, exhaustion taking him beneath the tide...before his eyes, the image of Narcissa being killed, over and over.</p>
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